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I can't stop thinking about my older cousin; what should i do?

I am a 16 year old boy and my cousin; she's 20. This started last year where we used to hangout in their balcony alot. We live in different cities and I often go visit with my family. Sometimes I would stare at her as* and boobs and now I would often think and dream about her ( having sex together). She would hug me when I visit and I normally get hard. I don't know if that's normal or not. How can I stop thinking about her? Should I be forward with her and tell her? Please, I need advice.
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134578 tn?1693250592
Take care of yourself, by not making a major social, family and societal error, you just sidestepped a big problem. Girls your own age are lovely, too.
Helpful - 0
2 Comments
Well I took your advice and I've been hanging out with a girl. She's sweet, pretty, funny, and smart. Thanks :)
Enjoy yourself and enjoy learning about real relationships. Hormones start things but hearts keep things sweet.
Avatar universal
AnnieBrook and specialmom, thank you really. I think I get it now thanks to you and some others. I understand now and completely agree with you both. It's just a stage and it will pass. All I have to do is focus on life and my tasks and probably forget about it. Maybe I'll try and find some girl my age as you recommended. Thanks from the bottom of my heart and I truly appreciate it.
Helpful - 0
973741 tn?1342342773
COMMUNITY LEADER
Yes, I agree. Keep the fantasy to yourself.  These things usually pass.  You are at the raging hormone stage of life without a lot of outlets.  This usually gets better.  In many parts of the world, it is quite taboo to have romantic relationships with your family.  And it would be very odd for a 20 year old young woman to be overly interested in a 16 year old boy.  :>)  So, get really busy with life, school and kids your own age.  That's my best recommendation to you.  I have a 16 year old son. I'm here to tell you that the next few years begin the shaping of your future.  Your school work and extracurricular activities are important!  So, try to keep your focus.  I know, that is very mom like of me.   But realistically speaking, it's fine to have thoughts in your head.  But telling her or trying to act on them can create a lot of either difficulty or awkwardness for you in your family.  
Helpful - 0
134578 tn?1693250592
No, do not tell her.  Just about all a 16-year-old consists of, is hormones. Your attraction is pretty much just biological, focusing as it does on her body parts. Telling her would be no compliment, she would probably be very appalled. Word might even get around the family, and they would REALLY be appalled.

Men and women are different about sex. To put it in an exaggerated way, pretty much any men would be glad to have sex all the time, and hardly cares who it's with. But because of this constant level of demand, women are disinterested in being treated as only bodies who are supposed to be happy to satisfy men's lust. If a woman were to say to a man "I like your as* and think about having sex with you," he would be delighted. If a man said it to a woman, she would be irritated, because that is what every man says.  Finding someone who would love and care for her (whether or not she has a caboose and boobs) and would be pleased to be able to stick around and help her raise their children, is her problem. The last thing your cousin needs is yet another horndog in her life who thinks it is a compliment to tell her that he is lusting after her, especially if that horndog is her teenage cousin.

Fantasize if you must, or even better, find a real girlfriend you can care about. Good luck!
Helpful - 0
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It’s jut not her body that I think about; I mean mostly I do but I like her. I know it’s wrong and yeah I understand that men and women are different. I do care about her feelings and I think I like her ( not just her body). I know that observing her body is just perving but what if I like her?
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