Aa
Please help
My LMP was 8th-15th September and I had protected sex on the 11-12 September with guy #A I was still on my period and on the 24th September i had unprotected sex with guy #B . On the 6th October I took clearblue pregnancy test which stated I was 1-2 weeks pregnant and on 8th October i had spotting which lasted few hours thinking it was my period I then had another clearblue pregnancy test that showed positive with 1-2 weeks pregnant and on the 14th October Clearblue test was 2-3 weeks. 7nth November 2022 I had my first ultrasound scan at the Dr which showed AUA was 8 weeks 0 days with EDD 19-06-2023, he also wrote on the report "however LMP is 8 weeks 4days" with EDD, because on the ultrasound it stated that my LMP was 12th September instead of 8th September and 12th was the day i had protected sex with guy A and i was still on my period which ended on the 15th September I wanted to know who is likely responsible to my unborn baby,on the 24th I did take Emergency pill and my 2nd due date is 15-06-2023 ,i was around 12 weeks it was December 06th and I had recent ultrasound at 19 weeks 1/2 days on the 22nd January with the due date of 17-06-2023.
Now I understand what you are saying, the clearblue test align with guy#2 and 8 weeks ultrasound , I agree with you. The AUA is on the ultrasound picture with EDD 19-06-2023 at 8 weeks 0 days "with" however LMP 8 weeks 4 days on the 7nth November, I understand it might be error because I remember Asking how far i was and Doctor said Gestational age was 8 weeks 0 days ,though my lmp would've been on the 8th but he is going to go with ultrasound measurement. The dates from ultrasound, just differ slightly and all points Guy #2. And I am also learning alot about conception, it was indeed difficult for me and I really thank you for your explanations ,they very helpful
4 Comments
I was also told by the OB that 8 weeks doesn't mean I got pregnant 8 weeks ago, they've just added 2 weeks from it from the start of lmp, so that's where the confusion started, could've guy#1 sperm lived inside me for that long but how? I dont realize condoms failing, i was on my period, what could've happened, maybe the condoms had faulty i didn't see"thoughts" since I made sure I took plan B after time spent with guy#2 , I was clueless about the possibility of Plan B not being effective by that time
Yes, I think the 8 weeks 0 days had to be your GA, the count from (roughly) when your period began.
Anyway, the second guy is the one with all the evidence. And the first guy, you had protection. Don't stress over which it is, just make plans to get the legal ducks in a row with the proper DNA test when the baby is born. This is not due to any doubt about who the dad is, but if your child ever needs anything from his or her dad, you need to have gotten the documentation correctly and properly from the beginning, that this is the father.
Anyway, the second guy is the one with all the evidence. And the first guy, you had protection. Don't stress over which it is, just make plans to get the legal ducks in a row with the proper DNA test when the baby is born. This is not due to any doubt about who the dad is, but if your child ever needs anything from his or her dad, you need to have gotten the documentation correctly and properly from the beginning, that this is the father.
I'll definitely give you the feedback ,when the baby arrives. I have been stressing, I'm feeling better now, it hasn't been an easy journey, but definitely I'll give you the results, thanks much
Talk to your doctor about getting a DNA test done in the hospital that's acceptable in court. He or she should know the procedure. And go with the guy when he does his swab, and witness him handing it to the lab tech. That way you can be sure there is no fraud on his part.
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The sex with Guy #1 was in the middle of your period (not near ovulation), it was protected, none of the dates (your baby being 8 weeks on November 7, the EDDs, etc.) suggest the sex with him produced the baby, and the dates do point to the sex on the 25th. It's kind of hard to see why you're even asking the question, (unless it's just anxiety, but even so, none of the medical evidence supports the idea that the first guy is the dad). Let me know what information in the list above is bothering you.
8 Comments
Thank you so much for your kind respond, well I have just been confused my whole pregnancy and stressing out, because I thought maybe with Guy#1 there might have had faulty with condoms that I didn't realize and the confusing part I took plan B with guy #2 afterwards, I have been on the numerous apps like Flo trying to figure out my fertile window, and cycle length because I never track my period cycle before ,and everything was just confusing since they said sperm can live inside for long plus yes the anxiety
And it was on the 23rd/24th when I had sex with guy #1. And I tried to find out with the conceptions of the due dates I was given and counting 7 days backwards, it still doesn't make sense with guy 1 for example with due date 15-06-2023 my conception was around 22nd September which counting back 7 days backwards it shows 16th of September, so I wasn't just sure
"They" said sperm can live inside for long -- don't know who "they" is, but sperm can live for a few days in the woman's body, that is true. But in your scenario it would have all been dead, dead, dead by the time you ovulated and got pregnant. At most sperm lives 4-6 days in your body (if you even had some there, but with protection you likely didn't). And regarding your Plan B, it only works something like 7 out of 8 times (check the FAQ's, I think it's a 1 in 8 chance that it's not going to have the desired effect.)
Anxiety can come with pregnancy especially if you're not married and are worried about survival in its various guises. But in your case you don't need to add who-the-daddy anxiety to general stress. Go with your head held high to the lab for the paternity test with the guy when baby comes, you don't have to doubt. Also, be sure you witness him doing his swab and handing it to the lab technician. You don't want there to be any fraud. Call the family court in your area of jurisdiction and ask the judge's clerk what to do to get a paternity test that the court will accept as legally binding on the dad. (Don't just do some at-home drugstore test.) This is for your baby's sake. You need to have the evidence of paternity in the baby's legal record. You don't have claims on the guy, but your child does, and your job as mom is to protect your child's rights.
Good luck!
Anxiety can come with pregnancy especially if you're not married and are worried about survival in its various guises. But in your case you don't need to add who-the-daddy anxiety to general stress. Go with your head held high to the lab for the paternity test with the guy when baby comes, you don't have to doubt. Also, be sure you witness him doing his swab and handing it to the lab technician. You don't want there to be any fraud. Call the family court in your area of jurisdiction and ask the judge's clerk what to do to get a paternity test that the court will accept as legally binding on the dad. (Don't just do some at-home drugstore test.) This is for your baby's sake. You need to have the evidence of paternity in the baby's legal record. You don't have claims on the guy, but your child does, and your job as mom is to protect your child's rights.
Good luck!
Thanks for this, I was just curious and I'll let you know for sure after paternity
Okay. At the top of the thread, you said, "I had protected sex on the 11-12 September with guy #A I was still on my period and on the 24th September i had unprotected sex with guy #B." And just above, you said "And it was on the 23rd/24th when I had sex with guy #1." Did you mean guy #2?
Guy #2 on the 23rd/24th i meant. Sorry ,just typing error
Your ultrasound on the 7th of November gave you a due date of June 19, correct? The most likely conception date for a baby due on June 19, 2023 is September 25, 2022.
In trying to guess where the error might lie in the data you wrote out above, it sounds like what you're calling the AUA is in fact the GA. Don't know if the use of the term "AUA" came from you, or the ultrasound tech, or the doctor, but mistakes do happen. If it was in fact the AUA and not the GA, you would not have been given due dates of June 19, June 15, and June 17 from three different ultrasounds. (They would have given you a due date no later than June 4, and they simply haven't.) Also, your pregnancy tests were all in the very low weeks when you took them, and if that had really been an AUA, your pregnancy tests would have showed higher numbers of weeks. Even your doctor noted that your period had been 8 weeks 4 days ago, meaning he didn't think the 8-week figure really showed when conception was. All your evidence lines up for the second guy, "AUA" 8 weeks doesn't make sense because it conflicts with the EDD they gave you on that very same day. So I suggest that's where the mistake is.
In trying to guess where the error might lie in the data you wrote out above, it sounds like what you're calling the AUA is in fact the GA. Don't know if the use of the term "AUA" came from you, or the ultrasound tech, or the doctor, but mistakes do happen. If it was in fact the AUA and not the GA, you would not have been given due dates of June 19, June 15, and June 17 from three different ultrasounds. (They would have given you a due date no later than June 4, and they simply haven't.) Also, your pregnancy tests were all in the very low weeks when you took them, and if that had really been an AUA, your pregnancy tests would have showed higher numbers of weeks. Even your doctor noted that your period had been 8 weeks 4 days ago, meaning he didn't think the 8-week figure really showed when conception was. All your evidence lines up for the second guy, "AUA" 8 weeks doesn't make sense because it conflicts with the EDD they gave you on that very same day. So I suggest that's where the mistake is.
Can i ask a question?
Can i ask a question?
1 Comments
Hi, Aida, you can post your own question or add to someone else's question as you've done here. Is your question for the person who posted this thread, or is it a DNA/Paternity question for yourself? If you're using your real name, you can post the question using an avatar name for confidentiality.
That's how the results are on the scan paper:
AVARAGE ULTRASOUND AGE
AUA: 8w0d EDC( AUA) : 19-06-2023
Gestational Age
+GA (CRL) Hadlock: 1.68 8w0d
AVARAGE ULTRASOUND AGE
AUA: 8w0d EDC( AUA) : 19-06-2023
Gestational Age
+GA (CRL) Hadlock: 1.68 8w0d
9 Comments
Fact is, then, they are using AUA and GA to mean the same thing. Average Ultrasound Age is the same as Gestational Age, and both begin the count with the woman's last period, two weeks or so before conception. [AUA can also be used to mean "Actual" Ultrasound Age, to describe the age of the embryo from conception, but that is obviously not what they were doing here.] Medical science does understand that a woman is not yet pregnant on the first day of her last period! But doctors use this count.
In any case, you can confirm what they meant when you look at the due date they gave you.
Now, get it together for doing the DNA test with Guy #2 when the baby comes, preferably right at the hospital lab. Good luck.
In any case, you can confirm what they meant when you look at the due date they gave you.
Now, get it together for doing the DNA test with Guy #2 when the baby comes, preferably right at the hospital lab. Good luck.
Thank you once more, you know the embarrassing part is, I have been on Guy #1 neck about getting paternity test since I used Plan-B pills with guy #2 ,didn't realize it's not working. But I thank you for clarity
Don't feel bad; if someone has sex with two guys only two weeks apart, it would be easy pick the wrong one to bug about getting a DNA test. And in fact, just in case every medical indicator and test is wrong (ha!), the closeness of the dates makes it perfectly reasonable to ask both men to test. The "no" the first guy gets will not only get him off the hook, but it will also confirm the other guy's "yes," which pair of tests provide a safeguard that the tests are accurate. (Though if you do want the first guy to test, don't withhold from him that all assessment of the medical results says he is not the dad. It wouldn't be fair to keep from him that there's really nothing for him to be scared about.) Is Guy #2 OK on testing?
Well I have never said anything nor communicate with guy #2 about getting paternity But he knows im pregnant, because I was not sure about him, it's just few weeks left though, will figure it out .. Guy #2 was just concerned how did I get pregnant because it was protected and I said because mistakes do happen, though I'm not saying it's him ,we should get paternity, he agreed but recently he has been ignoring me
Guy #1 I meant, was the one who was concerned about pregnancy since it was protected, he agreed to take the test but recently he has been off on me, saying he's not interested in anything
Guy #2 knows I'm pregnant but he doesn't know about the other guy
O.K., well. So, advice:
When talking to Guy #2, make the following points.
Say first that you had taken Plan B and thought that meant the sex with him couldn't have produced the baby, but as the pregnancy has progressed, all the baby's tests and due dates are indicating the date of sex with him [Guy #2]. Say you finally asked your doctor about it, and he told you not only that the date of sex [with Guy #2] was the right date to produce the baby, but that Plan B sometimes fails.
Be sure he understands that this is new news to you, so he won't think you're playing a game. If the topic of another guy comes up, say it had been weeks earlier and protected, so it never really made sense, but you hadn't questioned it because you thought Plan B was foolproof.
Then, say that if the two of you were married, the law assumes a woman's husband is the baby's father. But since you aren't, a DNA test needs to be done to protect the baby's rights.
If you say it like that, he'll probably get scared for a moment that you're hinting you want to get married, and then will be so relieved that you aren't, (and that he doesn't potentially have to insult *you* by demanding a DNA test), that he'll be OK on doing a test. At least, he probably won't demand to know anything more about prior sex with someone else.
Also just remember, you have legal authority on your side. Judges don't smile on guys shirking out of taking DNA tests -- in some states, a guy refusing to take one will cause the judge to declare him the father. Guys who drag their feet can be dragged into court.
This is all about the baby's protection. Not just for potential child support in case you need that, but in other undesirable events, such as the death of you or the dad, this information needs to be in the baby's legal record from the beginning. Simply put, sometime down the line, the baby might need his father. It also protects the dad if he decides he wants involvement -- you can't kick him out of the baby's life. It's a lot easier to have that DNA test in the records from the very beginning.
I wish you the best!
When talking to Guy #2, make the following points.
Say first that you had taken Plan B and thought that meant the sex with him couldn't have produced the baby, but as the pregnancy has progressed, all the baby's tests and due dates are indicating the date of sex with him [Guy #2]. Say you finally asked your doctor about it, and he told you not only that the date of sex [with Guy #2] was the right date to produce the baby, but that Plan B sometimes fails.
Be sure he understands that this is new news to you, so he won't think you're playing a game. If the topic of another guy comes up, say it had been weeks earlier and protected, so it never really made sense, but you hadn't questioned it because you thought Plan B was foolproof.
Then, say that if the two of you were married, the law assumes a woman's husband is the baby's father. But since you aren't, a DNA test needs to be done to protect the baby's rights.
If you say it like that, he'll probably get scared for a moment that you're hinting you want to get married, and then will be so relieved that you aren't, (and that he doesn't potentially have to insult *you* by demanding a DNA test), that he'll be OK on doing a test. At least, he probably won't demand to know anything more about prior sex with someone else.
Also just remember, you have legal authority on your side. Judges don't smile on guys shirking out of taking DNA tests -- in some states, a guy refusing to take one will cause the judge to declare him the father. Guys who drag their feet can be dragged into court.
This is all about the baby's protection. Not just for potential child support in case you need that, but in other undesirable events, such as the death of you or the dad, this information needs to be in the baby's legal record from the beginning. Simply put, sometime down the line, the baby might need his father. It also protects the dad if he decides he wants involvement -- you can't kick him out of the baby's life. It's a lot easier to have that DNA test in the records from the very beginning.
I wish you the best!
Thank you!!! Thank you !!! I will do that, and expect me to come back with the answers sooner
You're welcome. It would be nice if you could test with both guys just to remove the one-millionth percent chance there is an error, but the date information is so certain that if the second guy doesn't come up as the dad in the test, I'd suspect fraud or a lab error sooner than that the first guy is the dad. Against the fraud risk, on the important day that you, the baby and the guy are all doing swabs at the lab, be sure you are there to witness him doing his swab and handing it to the technician, so there is never a question of false play. For the same reason, don't do in-home tests. All should be done officially and according to procedures the courts accept. Talk to your doctor about that.
Also, I will say, you are going to be basically removing the guy's mental subscription to "Free As A Bird" magazine and giving him instead a lifetime subscription to GRW (Guilt, Responsibility and Worry) magazine, with this surprising news. It will be as life-altering to him as it is to you. You could take the lead by showing your empathy for what a shock it probably will be. A lot of his future feeling about the baby will ride on your kindness now.
Again, good luck.
Also, I will say, you are going to be basically removing the guy's mental subscription to "Free As A Bird" magazine and giving him instead a lifetime subscription to GRW (Guilt, Responsibility and Worry) magazine, with this surprising news. It will be as life-altering to him as it is to you. You could take the lead by showing your empathy for what a shock it probably will be. A lot of his future feeling about the baby will ride on your kindness now.
Again, good luck.
Maybe there might have been a mistake with using AUA because there's also GA ,wish i could share a picture so that you see
3 Comments
If the doctor in fact said to you that your gestational age was 8 weeks 0 days, that is the GA, not the AUA. Maybe you looked at both acronyms and mixed them up. Anyway, the GA makes sense from all of your information.
Thanks you, the GA on the 22nd January was 19 weeks 1 day with a tape measurement, on ultrasound scan was 19 weeks 3 days with edd 17-06-2023,... so it also go together with the 8 weeks 0 days on 07-11-2022 just few days off
It all goes with Guy B being the father, and Guy A being way too early.
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