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:) He finally said it. (:

Aug 23, 2010 - 3 comments



parenting a toddler



My two year old is so wonderful! He doesnt talk much unless he really has something important to say. He keeps to himself and loves to hand out muah kisses and hugs with pats. Since the day he was born I have told him I loved him no less than 10 times a day. I drill it into his head that he is the most important thing to me and that I  care for him more than anything or anyone in the world. His father does the same. I have never asked him to say it or anything of the sort but this morning he caught me by surprise. I use my name so he knows who I am talking about and his so he knows who it is I am talking too. So I said " Mom-mom loves her Dally-Doo" and he said "yesss". I smiled and held him closer repeating myself " I love you very much" and he said " I love you mom-mom too.". My heart filled with love as my eyes filled with tears of joy. I am so happy!!! He finally said it! :)

Ill be glad when my body gets back to normal!

Aug 20, 2010 - 0 comments


I have these abnormal sensations going on inside my uterus and to be honest i dont understand them. My guess would be that it might be shrinking. I think my problem is im too intune with my body, I can feel every one of my heart beats, every twinge of my digestive track, and any and all uterus activity and it drives me insane!!!!!! If i could be numb to all that goes on just for a day to save my sanity that would be awesome. I wonder if anyone else has this problem?  Maybe im insane, maybe i think too much, maybe its something i cant help...its just irritating. One thing i would love to feel is the tiny movements of a baby tickling the inside of  the womb at twenty weeks to go on and pound my ribs and  stomach at 36 weeks, to eventually feel a healthy baby in my arms at exactly 40. Only then would i actually hear my heart sing. :)

wow what now

Aug 19, 2010 - 4 comments

I am def tired of being told what is wrong with me and "god" doesnt want me to have a child and thats why i keep miscarrying. They ask me why im not so sad about said situation. Well its like this: i wake up everyone morning looking forward. Yes im sad on the inside but i cant just  sit around feeling sorry for myself. It will not do my body any good. I am a realist when it comes to life. I have my son to live for. I have a wonderful husband and a  mission i must accomplish. I want to have another baby therefore i must use all my extra time and energy preparing my body for the big event. If I allow myself to live in the past, that is exactly where i will stay. Depression and sadness affects everyone around you. Now why in the world would i want to put that burden on my family??? If i should come across more problems down the line , i can atleast look myself in the mirror and say i tried. Plus i know there are lots of babies in this world that need a loving caring home to call their own. Either way i will be a mother of two one day, and knowing that little detail puts a big smile on my face that will stay there forever. I think therefore I am. :)