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Not Me To

Aug 05, 2012 - 1 comments

On August 3, I found out what was going on with my huge belly. I have Ovarian Cancer, and a tumor that is as big or bigger than a basketball (30cmx30cmx20cm). It's no wonder I haven't been able to breathe properly, eat much, or have normal bowel movements or menstrual cycles. They found cancer cells in my uterus and rectum, with a more elevated amount in my rectum. They said they could see my left ovary, but not my right ovary and are assuming that the tumor stems from that ovary. I'm so scared that waiting for insurance coverage through work has cost me precious time, that in that time this tumor has grown so fast, and the cancer is spreading. They haven't staged it yet, but I'm going to see a Gynecologist/Oncologist this Tuesday, and he'll most likely perform the surgery. I'm also told that he will have a Rectal specialist with him, just to make absolutely certain that the cancer didn't start in my digestive system or colon. I'm SO NERVOUS! Mom died of cancer two years ago, and Dad is a survivor. Aunt Donna and Uncle Ralph on Mom's side both have Colon Cancer (diagnosed within a year of Mom's Diagnosis and two years of Dad's) Now Dad has to face the cruel reality that his little girl has cancer to. I'm so scared...I'm desperately afraid.

I Took A Spill Today

Jul 29, 2012 - 0 comments
Tags:

falling

,

internal pain

,

Ovarian Cysts

,

excruciating pain

,

lasted 20 minutes

,

hard to breathe



It happened this morning, and all I was trying to do was reach my cellphone to turn off the alarm blaring into the rest of the house. I hurried out of bed, tripped over my area rug and flew forward several feet. I attempted to break my fall by grabbing for some kind of leverage but failed. I fell so hard on my butt, that my entire gut system was shocked, jostled violently, and I promptly experienced the worst pain of my life for the following 20 minutes. I cried so hard, I literally thought I was going to die, that is how much it hurt. I was home alone, dizzy and disoriented, so I just turned off the alarm and tried to go back to bed once the waves and waves of excruciating pain passed.

I only made it through half my shift at work, and couldn't remember driving there. I guess I was driving really slow, because I was 15 minutes late getting in, and my coworkers were so worried they called everyone they could think of to find out if I was okay.

Since the fall, breathing has been more difficult. Getting up from a chair, I feel as if my entire gut system is going to fall out of my birth canal. I can't get a full breath, and BM's are extremely painful. Emptying my bladder is painful, and once empty I feel stabbing, shooting, and burning pain in my groin. I can't wait until my appointment on Friday...

Mood Tracker

Winding Down

Jul 29, 2012 - 0 comments

Or so it seems. I have been on my period now since around July 24th ish...blood flow has lessened to almost nothing, but will see if it starts up again with a vengeance in a few days (like it tends to do when the flow is lengthy and heavy)

Menstrual Cycle Tracker

Oh the PAIN

Jul 28, 2012 - 0 comments
Tags:

Back pain

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cramps

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Period

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groin

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hurts

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clots

,

brown blood

,

blackish blood



This one is way worse than the last.

Last period only lasted two days, with the first day being super heavy (irregular blood color). Second day was practically nothin.

This period is ungodly heavy (going through a pad every two hours), fibrous clots, and stabbing pain on either side of my groin (these aren't normal cramps). Shooting pain down the back of my right thigh, and major lower back pain. Strangely enough, I feel energetic for the first time in a long time. Unfortunately, my back hurts so bad I can't move around no matter how MUCH I want to!!! FRUSTRATIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGUH!!!!!!!

Cyst pain way worse than it has ever been. I'm in HELL!!!

Menstrual Cycle Tracker