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A Means to an End

Aug 31, 2009 - 3 comments

Tommorrow it will be one week since I had my second look surgery and the placement of my IP port. IVIP chemo starts on the 9th. I am trying so hard to stay positive and focused that this is my decision for the long term benefit of a long remission but I am so scared.

My son is counting down the days to his 12th birthday (the 15th) but I know that by the time that day comes I will be sick from the chemo and out of it. The second look surgery has left me sore and bloated..My anxiety has started in so much that my appitite is already gone and I haven't even started chemo yet..I'm not feeling sorry for myself what is this is...and I know it is a fraction of the pain I'll get with the ipiv. I need the strength and calm to know I am doing this so I can have a life with my children and be with them for many years to come. I want to be strong and enjoy every moment I can yet anticipating and fearing the future I am robbing myself of the present.

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523728 tn?1264621521
by bohan54, Aug 31, 2009
I can so identify with your last sentence.   Boy they aren't giving you much surgical recovery time.  We have to trust the buggers don't we?

785188 tn?1279928405
by babeblue94, Sep 03, 2009
What is teh IVIP and why are they giving that to you? What did the 2nd look surgery show?  I am on this site here and there because my mom is stage 3C and just had her 2nd surgery.  So Im still learning as we go a long.  They were able to do the complete hysterectomy this time around and she still showed microscopic cancer on the abdomen wall/lining so they will start chemo again in a couple weeks.

How sick do you all get from chemo?  My mom had 5 rounds the first time and was bed ridden the entire time, very very sick, throwing up all the time.  The docs keep saying she is one of the few that get that sick from it, but the more I read, I believe that quite a few people get pretty sick from the taxol/carbo.

Let me know your thoughts if you have time.  I am always looking for more information / encouraging things to tell my mom about what other people are dealing with and going through to help give us all hope.

Thanks
Shari

822194 tn?1263689103
by onthemendmomma, Sep 03, 2009
Hi Shari-

I'm on my way out the door but I'll write more later. I had 2nd look surgery after a complete debulking. They found 2 nodules w/ microscopic cells and cells in the lavage (wash). The IVIP is going to be cisplatin and taxocarb. I was really sick w/ chemo until they got Emend in the mix with the phenagrin and zofran.  The insurance fought giving me the Emend but in the end they figured it was cheaper than hospitalizing me each time. Hang in there!

hugs to you and healthy wishes for your mom,
christina

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