Nov 30, 2007
I don't feel as strong as yesterday. A lot low and depressed. Tired and crabby. I am not sure I have the will power to do this. Todd seems to be less helpful today. I feel like maybe he doesn't want me to change. I think my mind is over thinking. I use to look at people that did not do drug and wonder how it must feel to be happy and outgoing without drugs and I wanted that. I use to be normal and happy and outgoing before the drug and I cannot see how to get there.
It doesn't seem possible at this point. I am still hanging in there. I do need some strength I pray for God to help me.