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Mar 23, 2015 - 47 comments

Came into work and opened up my email to see this gem waiting in my inbox...

"Dear Jessica,
I know how mad you are at me and some days want to talk and some days want nothing more than to just punch me in the throat. I know how much you spilled your heart out to me in that letter you had typed out for me and unfortunately I don't have it here with me but I do have the letter from the last trip and can't get over the fact of how stupid I am and how much I have hurt you and I can't change what I have put you through and for that I am truly sorry. I also know me just saying that isn't going to make thing better. But if you can forgive me and if we could make the attempt to have this child as a family I would truly hands down give you all of my support till the end of my days. I don't want everything to pick up where we left off but to restart and rebuild this amazing thing I am so stupid to have damaged. When I get my *** home I am going to sit down and spill my heart for you and then we can go from there. I am sorry and I will tell you every day. Have a wonderful day and I miss you."

My reply was this;

"I can forgive you.
I already have.
If a relationship doesn’t have trust, then it has nothing.
I never had any doubts at all, we were together – and that was it. Of course I got a bit jealous when we’d be sitting together and there would be constant texts back and forth. And I tried my best to just get over it.
But now, all I have are doubts.
Is this going to happen again?
Why did you change your mind? Was it because she turned you down and you’re afraid of being alone?
Do you actually want to be with ME, or do you just want to be with me because she doesn’t want to be with you?
How can a person that ‘loved’ someone SO deeply, with SO much passion, turn on a dime and without any questions asked… without any chance of persuasion – just say ‘nope. I’m done. I want someone else’.

That was my absolute worst fear. I never thought in a million years that would happen, to us of all people.
The way you use to look at me was reassurance in itself, like you saying ‘I’m not going anywhere because what I want is right here’.

I’m not innocent by any means… But let’s face reality here… it’s impossible to get what we had back.
You can push Amanda out of your life and then change your mind and have her just drop everything (in the past) and attempt to make things work.
But me and her are nothing alike, in any way. And it only takes someone pushing me to the side, especially after months of me continuously breaking my heart by trying to get you to change your mind, for me to learn my lesson.

You just admitted a week ago that you were upset that she was still seeing Luke… You’re pissed that she’s not dropping everything to be with you again… And then all of a sudden you want to work on things? That, to me, doesn’t seem genuine – in my eyes, or anyone else’s for that matter.

If you couldn’t stop the inappropriate talk with her when we were GOOD, who’s to say it’s stopped now, or EVER?
You know how much it hurt to hear that WEEKS before you even told me we were done, that you told your brother you’d rather have a baby with her? That WEEKS before, you were apparently sending pictures of your **** to her? That WEEKS before, you were sitting NEXT to me, texting her, saying **** like ‘I better go. Jess is giving me a look’.

I would love to sit here, and blame it all on her – but the bottom line is, it wasn’t all her fault. Sure, she plays one hell of a game at being a manipulative ***** by saying the things she said.
But you’re just as bad if you were the one leading her on in the first place. I don’t blame her for not dropping the guy she’s seeing because you didn’t know your *** from a hole in the ground. Because I’m in the same ******’ boat.
I’d love to be with you. But I’d be an idiot to a LOT of people if I did.
You know how much **** I’ve gotten in, from legitimately everyone I talk to, because I even text you/reply to you?
I HATE that feeling, because I’m constantly defending you. Even when I was at the angriest, people were like ‘get over it. Find a guy with a real job that doesn’t just get everything handed down to them from mommy and daddy’… And there’s me, telling them to go **** themselves because I KNOW how hard you work, and nothing’s been just ‘handed’ to you from anyone. Having people tell me to ‘ditch the loser – he doesn’t give a **** about you’… and there’s me, saying well, at one point he DID. And I’ll be damned if I can just forget that.

My mind was clear when I talked to you Wednesday. We were split up, I was done trying with you and was content that it was done. I didn’t want this baby with you. End of story.
And now, I’m to the point where again… I have no idea what’s going on in your head because you’ve made it clear for 2 months that someone else was coming to take my spot… *sorry, her ORIGINAL spot… I think were the words you used.

I’m sure I’m going to be kicking myself in the *** for even ******* replying to this, and not just ignoring it like you did to me the last 3 months. But I guess that’s where you and me differ."

He messaged me good morning, and that he read my e-mail.
I said "morning"
He sent some text about how he was still outside Manitoba because he had to stop due to weather, I didn't reply.
He then sent that he wouldn't text me until they stopped again, or possibly when he got home. I said 'sounds good'.
And that has been it for our contact as of today...

I'm all for second chances... But this one needs to be 100% on the worth it scale...

Comments
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Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 23, 2015
lol. it just dawned on me how many 'curse' words are apparently in my reply, lol.
*sigh. sorry I have a potty mouth :(

2020005 tn?1628125976
by KTowne, Mar 23, 2015
Well if he's willing to 100% try, then it will be on the worth it scale, and as bad as he's hurt you, you can't hold on to it and you have to try to forgive, and not so much forget, because obviously that's not possible, but put it on the backburner. By all means, let him know this is serious and he really hurt you, but you also need to reach a point where you can let go of all of those emotions or he may end up retreating again and break your heart again

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 23, 2015
Is this something someone can get over though? like, say your husband did this when you were pregnant with Chloe? And you had your son (who wasn't your husbands) and you moved out, etc...


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by KTowne, Mar 23, 2015
The kind of love you have for him, I have no doubt with some work on both parts, you could get past it, over it? Probably not, but I'm sure it could get to a "safe" place where you can trust him again and be back to being happy. Its hard to say if I could personally get past it, 6 years of marriage, 2 kids and little "real" problems, if my husband did it to me, since he has never given me a reason not to trust him, I would be gone. We both mutually respect that we aren't comfortable with the other talking to the opposite sex besides mutual friends and that is "safe" for us, were both comfortable that way. I think you have a love for him that could get through about anything, its up to him now to prove it. As far as everyone else, whoooo cares who thinks what about you and him. If you try again with him, trust your instincts and the first sign of any talking inappropriate, with anyone, you need to give up on it and move on.

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 23, 2015
I guess we'll see what he has to say whenever we sit down face to face and talk.
I just get the very strong feeling that something happened. And she turned him away. And he's just afraid of being alone.
:(

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by KTowne, Mar 23, 2015
Well that should come out pretty quickly. I can't see how shed turn him down after all she's done, then again, who knows her level of crazy. If that is the case, I bet he's learned his lesson and realized he can't save his first family - and its time to try to fix this one before its too late.

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 23, 2015
But I don't want to be with him if the only reason HE wants to fix us, is because she doesn't want him.
Then what happens when / if she changes her mind...

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by Shannon79, Mar 23, 2015
I'm with you ri. I think that's what it sounds like too. It really seems like you've become "the other woman".

I hate to say that, but I think the writing is on the wall

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by KTowne, Mar 23, 2015
Well that's up to you to decide, if you want to hear him out and decide. If you feel like you can never get past it, your best bet is to stop contact until you're in a better place to handle him and his charming. But what ifs s*ck, and  I think you will know for sure after this one conversation, its either a new beginning or closure.

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 23, 2015
This is true.
I don't want to jump in saying I miss him, and being all lovey dovey until I talk to him. So that's why I've been just essentially giving him what he gave me for months. Telling him I missed him, and him ignoring it.

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by KTowne, Mar 23, 2015
Oh definitely, id be doing the same thing right now. But either way, I think this conversation is necessary for you to either forgive or move on. I think it will help you a lot!

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 23, 2015
I just got flowers delivered to my office.....

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by KTowne, Mar 23, 2015
Awee, from Corey? He's trying pretty hard, lol!

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 23, 2015
.....
yeah, they say "I'm so sorry! Corey"

2020005 tn?1628125976
by KTowne, Mar 23, 2015
He's quite a charmer, I can see where this is a problem, lol, stand your ground woman! Let him know you mean business and since he gave up, he's starting back at square 1, better start sending flowers weekly! ;)

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 23, 2015
RIGHT!? lol.
I'm glad you see what I'm working with here lmao

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by Mrs_teddy_bear, Mar 23, 2015
I will start out saying karma is a *****. He is getting the same thing from her that he did to you. She is staying in touch with her ex and that bothers him. Big shock.

Getting to my point. If y'all sit down and talk and he wants to get back together you need to set boundaries. I think with a lot of work the two of you could make it but I think he really needs to have the boundaries spelled out to him. I don't have a child with an ex so I can't give first hand experience but I have friends who do and the ones in relationships only have contact with their ex in regards to the kids.

I hope that he is sincere about this and not flip flopping.

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 23, 2015
Me too Mrs.
I just don't know - and I don't like that feeling.

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by Mrs_teddy_bear, Mar 23, 2015
Just saw the pic of the ring and what not. You need tell that boy that buying you things doesn't fix things. Action speak louder than words.

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 23, 2015
*sigh.
all I keep saying in my head was this could have ALL been avoided.
and now we need to start over. and im not sure I want to do that. what if I say ok, lets work on this... then a few months in, we're back at square 1 - and I wasted more time and emotions. ughk. this is stupid.

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by Hollus, Mar 23, 2015
I am a hopeless romantic and I strongly believe in second chances. My parents divorced when I was 9 and my mom was in and out of relationships, the longest being 20 years. I myself have been in a committed, loving relationship for 13 years. From these perspectives, I have some understanding of what you are going through but it isn't quite the same. I don't know what I would do if my spouse ever cheated on me or decided she didn't want to be in a relationship with me. I know that love is a strong and powerful emotion and I would do anything to get her back or to try to make it work. That said, I completely understand why you would want to believe him and give him another chance. I hope he is genuin and really has seen how wrong he was/is. I believe you can make it work and you may even be stronger together in the end. It is possible to forgive someone completely but don't forget what was done to you. I hope you can rise above it all and be a strong loving family. Definitely put up boundaries and stick by them! Hang in there and be as strong as you possibly can! I really do believe that things will work out for the best!

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 23, 2015
Thanks Hollus.
Obviously no one wants to be made a fool of in their lives. And I've been there 1 too many times in other relationships, where I learned my lesson, and didn't give it a second chance, and I fully believed that when me and Corey started dating, it was all worth it. It felt as if the stars aligned and everything just... made sense.
I'm a hopeless romantic too. But I've been hurt and damaged, and he was supposed to be the one who fixed all that, so it hurts having him be the one who bestowed the most pain on me.
I remember just looking at him and being SO happy... like, *sigh. This is it. Every little thing, was a lead up, to me meeting and being with him.
.... And then someone smacked me in the head with a frying pan, and I woke up. lmao.
My family is a BIG part of my life. So how does one come back from this, family wise? My stepdad always said we'd get back together. My mom never thought it'd get this far, but now that it has, I don't blame her for hating him... But I also would want my daughter to be happy. And if he made me happy once... He can surely do it again, right? :(
Her and my dad split up when I was young, and she was an alcoholic til I was like 13yrs old. She was moving my dad into his new house, and met Tim, my stepdad - and that was it. He like, moved in and they've been together since I was like 5. Mind you, she's been threatening to leave him going on over 10yrs now. She stopped drinking, he didn't. He's a seasonal worker (Shannon and kirchar will know what that is :p) and my mom makes minimum wage. So that puts a strain in itself financially. She said to me last night she's stupid. And made bad decisions in life, and she just doesn't wanna see me do the same thing. My mom and Tim are far from being in love anymore. I don't know if it ever was a time when I saw them look at eachother and just, glow. And I know that fades over time, so maybe I was too young to ever notice it... But I think that if he means it, and that HE was the one who came to his senses about what he lost with us, then... I should at least give him a second chance... ?

2020005 tn?1628125976
by KTowne, Mar 23, 2015
From experience, I can tell you family will come around. Especially with this baby coming and him proving himself. Family will support you no matter what, as long as he's good to you, and you're happy, which I'm sure you will make sure this is happening or he'll be hitting the road!

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by specialmom, Mar 23, 2015
I'm not romantic at all.  :>)  But, I've been married 15 years and together 18 with my husband.  I am practical.  I ruled people in and out with a strong hand when dating.  I read the red flags and didn't romanticize anything.  I don't believe love conquers all.  My friends who believe that and went ahead with men with red flags are either divorced or miserable wishing they were.  

I'm telling you this because don't let your heart rule the day on this.  Use your head.  You're a smart girl.  And if it were not for this pregnancy, I'm not sure there would be any discussion.  I'm just guessing that, of course.  

I am not sure about blaming his ex at all.  SHE's wasn't with you.  SHE wasn't supposed to be faithful to you.  She was just making plans with a man that she may love who is the father of her child. (which you have in common with her, right?).  HE did this to you.  Not her.  

I'd tell my best girlfriend this very thing so hope you don't mind.  With men, I think you get what you settle for in life.  And Corey has shown you who he is.  You can accept it with understanding that his character is weak and he could do it again.  Or you can start over to find someone who will love you fully and would never consider doing this to you.  I left a man that I deeply loved.  But I knew from his actions that we would not make it forever.  I am practical and married a man that I loved and trusted completely (still do).  

At the very least, do a lot of serious thinking about this.  You and your daughter deserve a happy, stable home.  I think you have a lot of loving friends here who want you to be happy.  Wishing you the best of luck and a level head when it comes to sorting this out and what is best for you.  peace and hugs

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by AnnieBrooke, Mar 23, 2015
If you think he is only being lovey dovey because she tossed him out, there is an easy enough way to find out.  Ask her.  
She might not have any particular reason to tell you the truth, but if that is all you want to know and you don't go into any other topic (like, recriminations and anger), she might tell you.

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 24, 2015
I've already emailed her.
I reactivated my facebook, and messaged her saying I know she hates me, but I just want the truth and said he was apologizing and asked her if she had turned him down. Also stated that although SHE may have wanted to live in a fantasy world and just believe HIS word when we split up, by blocking me from texting her, etc... I would like her to be honest with me.
She read it, and didn't reply. And then blocked me by the end of the night.
Only for me to wake up and have like 10+ notifications of my 'photo's' being reported for nudity. LOL. Like, pictures of me and Riley and stuff.
She's obviously VERY mature :)
So, whatever. I deactivated my Facebook again... And I told Corey that I'd hope if he has any brain, that if he thinks this will work at all, he will be blocking/deleting her from his facebook as well.
They didn't become FB friends until a week after we split, and are still currently friends because she tagged him in a comment on something last night.

1580318 tn?1550254481
by Shannon79, Mar 24, 2015
The writing is still on the wall in big black marker my dear.

I know you want to try and give it a shot. People like him are experts at deception, telling lies etc...That may be painful to hear, but deep down I think you already know that

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 24, 2015
I get not wanting to start 'drama' or whatever her logic is...
But for me, all I see it as, is that she has 0 respect for anyone but herself and what she gains out of this.
If SHE were coming to me asking what was happening, I'd tell her. Because she has a child, and I don't want her to be lied to. Regardless of how I feel about her as a person. I am not with Corey, so it's like, what do I have to lose telling her the truth, you know?
Which makes me think she's got sh*t she's hiding in regards to them two, and she doesn't want to get him in trouble, because then he'll get ticked at HER for telling me the truth, etc. Just like when he got ticked about when I told her that we were still being intimate.
I didn't tell her to hurt her, I told her because she was being naïve to think he was being honest.

1580318 tn?1550254481
by Shannon79, Mar 24, 2015
I totally agree. I'd wanna know too! Obviously she doesn't care

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 24, 2015
I knew this was going to happen though.
lol.
As sad as it is. I was like, i'm gunna message her, shes gunna block me, and then im gunna get a text from corey saying wtf.
BUT, he did tell me to call her when I was talking to him trying to figure out why she was at his hotel. And he then said she wasn't, he was at her house because they were talking and that she was never invited to his hotel, ever. and was never there. So, whatever.

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by jugglin, Mar 24, 2015
I hope you don't mind that I have been following your journals.  I think that Specialmom wrote a wonderful response here. You are a young, beautiful, compassionate woman and mother.  You have so much to offer somebody and deserve to be treated with love and respect.  I know you want C to be that man that you met, fell in love with, and went through the loss of a baby with...sadly, I do not think he is that man.  I think he has shown you who he is.  I spent many years hoping and praying that the guy I met would turn back into that guy I fell in love with....it never happened for any length of time.
I am now happily married for 20 years to a wonderful man...don't get me wrong, he had growing to do as did I.  But, we have a relationship based on mutual respect, give and take, and common goals for our family.  This would have never happened had either one of us played the emotional game of, "I love you...I love somebody else....I love you....I love somebody else".  As painful as it is, his ex is not where your focus needs to be.  I get that you want answers and she overstepped her boundaries and is immature...but you need to focus on you, R, and baby bean.
Should C actually grow, change, mature and show you this, then maybe there is a chance.  But this is an evolution of change, not an overnight "I messed up...or changed my mind".  This would take months and months of his proving himself and his commitment to you and your family.  In the mean time, it would be good for you to continue to live on your own, as a single mom, as much as it is a struggle.  Focus on you and your children.  The stronger you become...the better you will be as a mother, friend, daughter, and eventually a partner.
I wish you nothing but the very best either way...no judgment whatsoever.  Just remember that you and your children deserve the very best in a partner and father...whomever that may be.
Prayers to you for strength, comfort, guidance, and peace n joy in your heart!


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by krichar, Mar 24, 2015
I agree with specialmom... Regardless this woman has nothing to do with it and owes you nothing
.... It is Corey's job to be honest, his job to faithful, and his responsibility.. He accepted her message, he texted back, he called, he left, he told you to move out. It doesn't matter what tools or tricks she may or may not have used it was all his choice, he's a big boy! And if he is that easily manipulated once it can happen again.

Think of it this way. What if no other woman was involved? What if there was no scapegoat for him to blame. What if he just said all the things he said because he didn't want to be with you? What if he just let you move out and went out partying? Would you still be having this conversation.... Right now it's easy to blame her, that she's the reason for all of this. It does complicate things but at the end of the day it is all on him.

Now.. I dont know you that well, and all I inow is what you've typed but from an outsiders view that is what I see. Is my marriage perfect? HELL NO!! All men can be a$$es and do stupid things but this is a deal breaker.... A man should never be confused on who he loves and wants to spend his life with and a real man will stand up for you and defend you


Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 24, 2015
thank you for your reply.
you're absolutely right... but the more I think of it, the more overwhelming things become...
I will need to register Riley schools for this coming September because she's not eligible to go to the school she's in now, based on where we live. But then, pending things go well... do I really want to move BACK to the school district she's in now, and then change her schools AGAIN, next September if me and Corey decide to move back in, etc.? Or possibly pull her out of the school halfway through or have to drive her 40m to school each day, regardless of where we live?
Obviously I'm getting ahead of myself, and I don't want to jump right back into things (that is IF I even decide getting back with him is worth it)
This move was enough on Riley as it is, I don't want to switch her schools and then switch her back again. But I also wont have the money to be driving her 40min there and back (if I keep her in the school she's in now, in september) 5 days a week, with a newborn toting along...
It's just all very stressful for me. I'd like to just go with the flow, but that's how I ended up here :\

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by heather727, Mar 24, 2015
I think you've already made up your mind about what you want and you're just worried about what other people will say about your decision. You love him - regardless of what he's done. You want to try and work things out. There is nothing wrong with this.

Do I believe that people can screw up and do horribly stupid things? Yes. Nobody is perfect. Do I think that because they screwed up once they are doomed to forever make the same mistakes? No. People can learn and people can grow. Do I think you should open your arms and accept his appoligy with no questions asked? H E L L NO!

He says he's sorry - he needs to proove it. He says he's changed - he needs to proove it. He says that you're the most important thing to him - he needs to proove it. I'm not saying you should run the guy through the ringer and treat him like [email protected] - that would just be sinking to his level and you're above that. He needs to show you every day that he loves you and that he's sorry for hurting you. He needs to show you that you can trust him again. He needs to do everything in his power to make you feel safe.

While he's working on that, you need to work on YOU. Keep your appartment. Register R for school near where you live now. Continue to plan your future as if C isn't a part of it. Be happy with yourself - exactly the way you are now. If you're not happy now with you, no one else will ever make you happy.

You need to get to a place where YOU feel comfortable with yourself and your decisions. Then you won't care what other people think. You'll just be happy - in whatever decision you've made.

I also highly recommend counselling for the two of you. Whether you decide to stay together or apart, a counsellor can help with either transition.

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 24, 2015
I told him I assumed he would be deleting her if he is serious about this working. He just texted me saying 'it's done, and good morning'. I checked, and he actually did it.
weird.

2020005 tn?1628125976
by KTowne, Mar 24, 2015
I agree with heather 100%, its clear you haveunfinished business with him, who cares what anyone else says, he's trying to prove himself and if he can do that, then you will go back to being happy.

2006473 tn?1422033301
by Mrs_teddy_bear, Mar 24, 2015
I think Heather hit the nail on the head.

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 24, 2015
LOL.
Amanda is texting me.
Just got a picture of a nice bouquet of flowers and an apology for everything that's happened before and that she thinks we both need to talk.
apparently, last time THEY talked, he still wanted to try for him and her... I sent her a few screen shots, and we were both in hysterics laughing about how big of idiots we are.

1742167 tn?1436471720
by heather727, Mar 24, 2015
Well, I think that's your answer right there. I'm all for second chances but definitely NOT thirds!

2020005 tn?1628125976
by KTowne, Mar 24, 2015
definitely answer right there, ridiculous!!!

Avatar universal
by ribaby15, Mar 24, 2015
I just called BirthRight and they're going to have someone contact me after 6pm tomorrow in regards to putting the baby up for adoption.
I feel seemingly calm, considering.
I knew it was too good to be true lol.

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by mhv, Mar 24, 2015
Just make sure he is the one playing you, and not Amanda.  I can't believe I just typed that...but woman can be conniving too.. Just saying!  Those flowers could have been from a while ago....I just know I don't trust him right now, but I sure as heck don't trust her!  
I would seriously tell you to run from both as them as fast as your legs could carry you, but there is a tiny being inside you that make ths whose situation a cluster.  
I really don't think Corey is ever going to you permission to give your baby up for adoption.  #1, it's his leverage with you, #2 it's his son.
I hope you are able to find closure in all of this.  It's hard knowing there are children involved.  

I was adopted, and am thankful everyday my birthmom gave me up.  You have hard decisions to make in the coming days and months.  

Avatar universal
by azndoraemon, Mar 25, 2015
It doesn't matter whether he got turned down by his ex or what other excuses. I would not go back. Even if ge gets me flower, diamonds d kneel down.  I consider this is an extreme case where I can forgive him for his action but nothing more. If you guys had normal gf/bc fight and break up then is a different story. I would not take a person back for cheating or tearing up my heart like that. I have quality and I have a limit.

I can go on with a few more paragraphs but I don't think is going to help because I feel like for you to post this question - meaning you are want a second chance. What ever you decide on, good luck

Avatar universal
by azndoraemon, Mar 25, 2015
I wrote my above comment before reading all the comments here.

And I just want to say - it really doesn't matter why he wanted to go back to you. If Amanda didn't reject him and he decided to go back to you - my answer still a no. For you to reach out to Amanda - that tells me you want a second chance.

I'm very strict with my love life and I don't allow a men to break my heart like that. You can say I play hard to get. I always know what I want in a relationship. I found a super great husband and I know you can do it. Don't rush into it. Focus in raising your daughter, that's the best gift in your life. I would put my kids as the most important thing in life over relationship.



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by melimeli, Mar 31, 2015
Just seeing this.  It is easy for us to armchair quarterback.  We don't have the feelings that you have wrapped up in everything or the child you are carrying.  We will support you either way.  We will understand either way.  Just because you go back now doesn't mean you can't leave if you need to later.  MANY of us have given second chances and are in no position to judge.  Good luck and prayers be with you

296076 tn?1371334474
by melimeli, Mar 31, 2015
Just read the rest.  I put a link on another journal of a couple that would like to adopt a second.  Not that you at all have to go with them ahha.  Just to let you see that there are great people out there.  They have an open adoption with their first and send pic, letters etc.  If that is the choice you make it is a very selfless one.  It will hurt your heart but it is selfless.  If you change your mind a hundred times between now and birth we will all understand and support you!  You are strong girl!  Stronger than a lot of us at your age.  I pray for peace of mind for you and wisdom with your decisions.

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by ribaby15, Mar 31, 2015
Thank you melimeli.
Adoption is still in the back of my mind... So far so good... although it's not even been really a week yet :S
I'm not getting my hopes up, but I'm having this baby regardless... The question if I'm going to keep it or not is still up in the air.

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