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Falling over

Dec 10, 2010 - 4 comments

Is falling over just a maladaptive way to deal with life?

I feel so shut down but was wondering whether this was an excuse not to help myself, or a reason to have others help me.  Or is this just a result of compounded stress, etc and not motivated by anything.

I was just wondering whether it is that I can't or won't help myself.

Is hard to try and explain.  Try running a number of marathons and then turning around and doing another.  It's relentless and severely taxing.

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Avatar universal
by whitecat78, Dec 11, 2010
Sounds like you are stuck in a bad rut. Do you communicate with people outside of the computer? I know when I isolate myself, I start feeling what you are describing.

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by Jaquta, Dec 11, 2010
Very stuck.  I see my doctor once a week (most weeks) but other than that don't have any real social contact.

I feel so tired but then I also feel I should be doing other stuff (like exercising, etc) and then feel so overwhelmed.  So add overwhelmed to tired, apathetic and amotivated.

I wasn't sure whether to keep posting on the mood disorders expert forum.  I like the doctor's input but I'm not sure how appropriate it is to keep asking questions, etc there.

How is one suppose to just snap out of this anyway and start being high functioning?

I was thinking that maybe I should just make another appointment to see my doctor next week, or call if there are no appointments available, and ask for help.  I seriously can't do this anymore.  Eat, sleep, watch TV, check my e-mails, eat some more, sleep some more.  I can't deal with it.  It's excruciating.  Reminds me of when I was depressed and would mark off the hours to my next psych appointment (usually months away).  I'm not counting the seconds again just yet but it still feels really painful.

I have tried to be skillful in asking for help but I keep being told to wait.  I've been waiting for what feels like forever.  And it has been months and years.  Do I sound like one of those kids in the back seat?  How much longer?  The response isn't all that different to what parents give either.  We're nearly there.  (Several hours later...)

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by SonOfSun, Dec 13, 2010
Aurora swims through the ether, and the fire in our throat will beckon our perpetual existence. Who we are on the outside not always complements who we are on the inside.. We continue weary and tired.. but even the stars look brighter tonight, nothing is impossible.. sometimes this world feels like just an illusion, manifested from some unknown apparition...

Everyone has hopes, you're human after all...

Avatar universal
by Jaquta, Dec 13, 2010
And maybe it is just an illusion?  There seem way too many dimensions to this world at times.

Very poetic and thought provoking.

Some dreams just burn a little less brightly sometimes.

Thanks for your comment.

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