It's nice to have finally found somewhere online that I can record my good days - and my bad - without feeling like someone is judging me. I'm hoping that by keepong all my records public it will encourage me to actually do the things that I've said I'm going to do - I made New Year's Resolutions, as you do, but some of them just don't seem to have stuck. Being a Pagan it's a New Moon today and I've just celebrated Imbolc which means 'new beginnings' - it's bascially the time when witches have their spring clean! But it doesn't just mean physically, but can be mentally and emotionally as well, so now is as good a time as any to sit down and start doing something about my life and health. Both for my physical and emotional self.
I haven't touched a cigarette or marajuana since 31st December 2010 so I'm really pleased about that. Every day it seems to have got easier to say no and now I don't even think I want to smoke! My husband is a smoker, only of cigarettes, but he has cut down a lot and refuses to smoke in front of me or in the house which is really good of him. He does plan to give up but is finding it a lot harder than I am. I have gone COMPLETELY cold turkey here - no patches, gum, or any other nicotine/drug assistance. I think it's better that way; I'd rather get the drugs completely out of my system, even if I do feel a bit crappy for it.
No one warned me about the side effects of going cold turkey after you've been a smoker for 10 years.... in the first week without a cigarette I got this awful chest infection and a cough which made me sound like I'd been smoking about 50 Superkings an hour. It lasted for a good couple of weeks, but has since, thankfully, subsided. Now I have really swollen glands in my throat and my tonsils are NOT looking very healthy right now! They have little white spots on them, just like when you get a bad case of tonsilitis, and my throat feels really closed over. I've been drinking lots of water and as of this month have also made the decision to stop drinking alcohol for a while. I'm not addicted to it but I don't think it's helping my throat right now! I've been well informed that these are perfectly normal side effects. In fact, apparently, it's a good thing - the white spots on my tonsils, bad cough and swollen glands are all signs that my body is clearing out all the ganky mucous that smoking causes. I've also been told that my throat hurts because when you smoke your throat produces extra mucous to protect itself, and when you stop the mucous stops being produced so your throat feels really dry, like you're dehydrated all the time. I'm drinking as much fluid as I can. I think I also need to cut down on coffee because that can't be good for me either. I've also been suffering from insomnia, again another common side effect, apparently, which is bringing me down a bit - by 3pm everyday I feel shatttered. I took herbal sleeping pills at first but in the past week have been doing okay without them. I must start having some earlier nights - the lack of sleep seems to be what's causing my grouchiness rather than the lack of smokes!
I've also decided to lose the last few pounds that I need to to get my body down to it's (and mine!) ideal weight. People said I was mad quitting smoking and trying to diet at the same time, and they were absolutely right. I'm finding it quite hard. I haven't lost a thing since the beginning of the year, but I haven't eaten anything that I shouldn't. I think I'm just generally eating too much - even if it is the right thing. I have just over a stone to lose - last year I got down to my lowest weight ever of 8st 3lb - I'm now 9st 7lb, and I'm hoping to get down to 7st 12lb (no less than that though - I'm a short person so that's still a good weight for me even though it sounds low). I used to have a huge food problem but not so much anymore; I know that I really need to stop eating so much and it's due to the fact that I'm substituting the smoking! I'm not sticking to any particular diet, just eating healthier. It's worked before, I'm in no doubt that it can work again. Just need a bit of inspiration, discipline and somewhere to keep track of what's going on!
Anyway, I'm signing off for the day as once again I'm feeling pretty sleepy and I want to get some more stuff done so *maybe* I can get tomorrow off and do some things I want to do - like go for a walk in this lovely early spring sunshine!