May 31, 2012
Yesterday was a bad day. I did make a doctor appointment though. Sure hope she can tell me whats wrong. I started writing down everything, so i can remember. I did a lot of reading yesterday, and im pretty sure its anxiety making my life hell. Staying busy helps. I kept busy all day yesterday, but when i finally did sit down, it was like i was being smothered. I was consciously breathing. I was afraid to go to sleep because i thought i would quit breathing. Thanks to my husband, i finally fell asleep. He is like my safe house. When im with him, i feel so much better. I wish i could go back to normal. I feel like everyday my life is just passing me by. Like im watching some stupid movie on the lifetime channel. Not actually going through it. Maybe its because of the blurred vision that i feel like that. Its like.... i dont even know... i cant explain it. I dont like it and i want it to go away. Looking forward to movie and wine with my hubby later.