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just me

Jun 08, 2009 - 2 comments

I am so depressed, I don't really know what to do anymore. I can't take much more. I think daily almost hourly about ended it all. Just taking what pain meds I have and going to sleep. The husband doesnt want to find a job, he sits and watches t.v or sleeps all day, when he isnt on the pc playing games. I am tired of stuggling to make ends meet. I am so tired of not having anything and counting change. I am tired of my son  and his girlfriend and them thinking calling me in the middle of the night complaining, drunk or high about each other. I am tired of everything. I feel like I don't belong anywhere. I think I am going to leave my husband and find an apartment just for me. I need something good to happen to me. I need to feel alive again and to be happy. I really don't know the last time I was truly happy. My brother fixed my p.c yeah! but I don't know if I can afford internet connection now. Something else to worry about. I guess I am going back to Tennessee today, not sure why. I just feel so alone right now and that life just isnt worth hanging around. The other kids are grown and don't need me and I am so tired of dealing with the youngest. and basically life itself. I just don't know what to do anymore.

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by dominosarah, Jun 08, 2009
I am really sorry to hear about how you are feeling.......We need you and want you here.  Whenever you feel like life isnt worth it you come on here and look around........As for your son i think it is time for some tough love with him again.  Turn your phone off and let him know no more middle of the night calls when you are drunk or high.  You dont need that.  Maybe change would be good for you now......You deserve some happiness.  For whatever it is worth just know i care about you.......sara

Avatar universal
by 10356, Jun 08, 2009
I agree with sara mom.. we are here for you. turning off your phone at night is a very good idea.. I also agree you deserve some Happiness.. As far as Hubby wish I had some good advice for ya.. My sons girl complained of the very thing with the computer games.. This is new as we did not grow up with this problem.. Maybe a drive will get you out and focused.. sometimes we have to push harder for ourselves to get through times like these.. You are not alone.. I hope your other son is doing well.. There are those that love you and still need you.. Big hugs for Mom.. lesa

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