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Trying to be kind to myself.

Dec 12, 2013 - 0 comments

Ugh.  The arctic front that blew in last week blew in every pollen, mold, and dust particle known to man - all of which I'm allergic to.  That, coupled with a 40 degree sudden drop in temperature in one day, resulted in  the grandaddy of all sinus infections.  Wahoo.  I ended up with an antibiotic and a double shot of steroids.  And steroids can increase anxiety.

On top of that, the holidays are in full swing.  And I'm broker than the Ten Commandments, so I've had to scale way back on my holiday treats.  And by scaling back, I really mean stop.  None.  Zilch.  I know my dear ones I understand, but it's so not fun for me.  So that's been hard.

And, my anxiety journey is still just that - a journey.  I know realistically I'm going to have good days & bad days.  And I'm still working on regulating on meds.

So: we have here an anxiety person.  Who is still kind of working things out on the anxiety.  Who is in an anxiety-inducing time of year.  Who is on medication that can also increase anxiety.  Yahoo.

This morning, I found myself tip-toeing back to being anxious about being anxious.  Ugh!  I started to scold myself, "you should be past this!".  But I need to remember - this is a journey.  I need to be kind to myself.

So - I'm praying my meds kick in soon to defeat the sinus infection.  I'm doing what I need to get done - and what doesn't get done wasn't important.  I'm turning on some Christmas music and going to go make some hot chocolate.  And I'm going to remind myself that right now the deck is stacked a bit against me, and I just need to hang in there....

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