U look loverly and radiant here!

Thank you. That's the look I was going for. I was sitting next to the man I fell in love with at the ripe old age of 47---the first, and so far only---man I ever loved. We got along marvelously. He was a doctor I worked with. Six years younger than I was, handsome (though I worked with him for 6 months and didn't notice how good looking he was until we became friends and I learned how intelligent and humorous he was). A charming smile. A wicked sense of sarcasm & wit to rival my own. Eclectic interests that made him unendingly interesting. An active outdoorsman. (Desiring to keep up with him on his rock-climbing, biking & hiking adventures is what inspired my last & most successful attempt at weight loss/fitness gain.) Alas, after flirting with me incessantly for months, emailing me 5 times a day and going out to a concert and another event together, he permitted himself to be seduced by a 29 year old we worked with and dropped me like a hot potato. Then, he decided on an impulse to move 2000 miles away. This was at his farewell party and my goal was to leave him with the impression that I was pretty & happy---and he was a fool for loving me back!

Worked with him for 6 months BEFORE I noticed his looks. We worked together for 5 years all together.

I wish I could see him. It says to click to see full pic but when u click it it goes to ur next pic. He sounds like an amazing guy. I'm sorry he broke ur heart like that. Did u work for long with the 29 year old? And did she know u were dating him at the time? I'm sure he has wonderful traits but he also sounds like a real womaniser. Well u look gorgeous and happy here so I'm sure u showed him! :)

I of course meant he was a fool for NOT loving me back! I worked with the 29 year old for 5 years including 2 years after he left. (They continued to date long-distance for a while but have gone separate ways since. He & I weren't dating---just friends, but flirting & seemed to be turning romantic---when they slept together on a mountain climbing trip that a group of work friends took. Yes, she knew that I was interested and that he and I had an easy "back & forth", that he was constantly flirting with me (squeezing up against me even in a wide hallway where he had ample room to pass, resting his hand on my thigh under the nurses' station desk, making "double entendre" remarks, etc.) and knew we had gone out as friends. I don't blame her for "stealing" him---he's a big boy who did what he wanted---but when they returned as a couple, she went out of her way (successfully) to flaunt it in my face and to damage the friendship I had with him. She tried to cause some difficulties for me at work, too. Months after he left, I asked her if she'd share his address so I could send him a Christmas card and a CD with all the photos I'd taken at his farewell parties. (We had 2 parties---one a formal one with our supervisors and a more raucous one with just his friends from work.) She replied that she didn't feel comfortable doing so without his permission. So, I made two copies of the CD---one for him, one for her---and asked her if she'd give it to him when she went out to see him. (She was traveling to the state he'd moved to to run a fundraising marathon for Leukemia & Lymphoma research. I'd given her a $50 donation and a good luck card with scrapbooking cutouts of San Francisco where she'd be running.) Next thing I knew, the boss called me into the office saying that the 29 yo had accused me of creating a hostile work environment for her by writing to her. He was the fool. They had little in common whereas he & I never ran out of things to talk about. He was beginning to age---hairline receding, a bit of a paunch starting; but I'd have been loyal to him old, bald, fat & impotent! I little piece of my heart will always belong to him and losing him hurt to the point that sometimes I thought it would've been better to have never met him. BUT...I'm glad I did. Wanting to keep up with him is what led me to lose nearly 100 lbs. & keep it off for nearly 2 years ('til I hurt myself running a half-marathon a month after he left; the 29 yo was a marathoner (cont)

(continued) the 29-year old was a marathoner and I felt the need to prove "I coulda been a marathoner, too, if I wanted to be..."; how foolish!). But, despite losing him, I try not to regret meeting him. He set me on a path that allowed allowed me to lose enough weight and gain enough muscle & courage to me to travel to Hawaii to do a fundraising half-marathon (even though I had to limp through it due to stress fractures in both legs)...go rock-climbing and mountain climbing and sky-diving...and to go on my first ever real date at age 47 (other than my "as friends" outings with him---though he held my hand & played with my bracelets, rested his hand on my thigh during the concert, lay his head on my shoulder and nuzzled my face on those outings). And they say "being happy is the best revenge", so even though I've had a set-back by regaining 60 of the 100 lbs. I lost, I am determined to get thin & fit enough to once again pursue "active adventures" and, hopefully, to feel confident enough in my appearance to date & maybe meet the RIGHT guy! (I do so hope there IS a right guy out there waiting for me to come along!) As for your wish to see this fellow, I'm staying at my sister's caring for my ill father and I don't have a pic of him; perhaps I'll post one (just long enough for you to see) when I return home in future weeks. ;)

Ur right..he is a big boy. And boys will do what they want to do. But she could have been more civilized about what went on instead of rubbing it in ur face and then causing problems with ur boss! And u were so nice to her! I guess she still saw u as a threat and that's why she did what she did. Deep down she knew u were more of a match for him.

Well its great what the experience has giving u! U turned the negatives into positives by changing the way u wanted to live ur life. How can u regret that! I mean loosing 100 lbs! Getting fit, traveling..running marathons! And like u said "being happy is the best revenge". Its so true!! Ur an amazing girl for accomplishing all of that!
I'm sure u would have been loyal to him impotent and all lol but I believe he was just there to set u on the right path to where u are now and will be in the future. Apart of ur heart will always belong to him because he was ur first love but I doubt he is ur last! U will find ur guy..there's millions waiting for u to come along.

Yes, I am a nurse. I spent most of my 28+  year career in ICU and ER nursing though I've also worked in geriatrics, med-surg and taught in nursing school.

You are right. The 29 year old could've been much nicer. She was pretty: blonde, flawless, "peaches & cream" skin, sky blue eyes, a movie-star white smile. But "pretty is as pretty does" and in general she wasn't very nice. She frequently made demeaning remarks about coworkers, patients & others. One incident I clearly recall was when she made nasty remarks about a patient/her family one day. I'd cared for the patient, a woman from the south who was up here visiting her son. The son & another family member (his wife, if I recall) had accompanied her to the ER. She was very sick and they were very worried but tried not to "bother" anyone despite her bedside monitor alarm ringing constantly and a long delay (unfortunately very typical in the US medical system now) in getting her lab & xray results. You could tell they weren't rich; their clothes were inexpensive & had been patched/mended. You could tell that they weren't that educated; they sometimes used the wrong words or mispronounced things and they had to be given information in very simple terms. Each had a number of teeth visibly missing and it was obvious they hadn't been able to afford dental care; the patient admitted herself that she'd never seen a doctor except when she developed hemorrhaging when delivering one of her children. But the son & his wife were so kind to the patient and they tried not to "bother" the staff with any requests unless their mother urgently needed something. When they did have to make a request on her behalf, they were exceedingly polite in doing so and offered profuse thanks for even the slightest kindness I or other staff members provided. And the mother was more concerned about her visitors being worried & becoming tired from the long weight than she was about herself. And when a baby in the next cubicle was crying from a painful procedure, all of them were worried about it. Good, kind people The 29 year old, however, kept mimicking their slow, drawn-out accent and giggling. And, as they were leaving, she asked the doc, "so, between all three of them, did they have enough teeth to make one full set of teeth?" The doctor (the fellow I loved and that she was dating) laughed. (cont)

(continued) I was FURIOUS! I was standing between the two of them at the time in a very confined space. I swung around, inches from his face and demanded, "And just what are you laughing at? At the fact that they weren't blessed with the priveleges you were? That they didn't get the education and medical care that you got?" He'd told me about his brother who'd never been the same after suffering a head trauma and about his sister who is gay and I asked, "So, they are different from you. That makes it okay to make fun of them? What if it were your brother or sister being ridiculed for things they had no control over?" He was very sheepish and followed me around for the rest of the shift repeatedly saying he was sorry. I just walked away saying "It's not me you owe an apology." In a way, the episode made it more bearable that we hadn't become serious, because I wouldn't want to be with someone who based a person's value so heavily on their appearance. So, I'm not surprised that the 29 year old was not more gracious towards me---it wasn't her style.

Anyway...I'm sorry to have gone on & on and bored you. I shall try to keep future notes shorter! You are right, though. Have you ever seen that email that circulates now & then about "Friends for a Season---Friends for a Reason---and Friends a Lifetime?" It asserts that some friends are just intended to accompany us in life for a limited time---to support us through a shared difficulty, to introduce us to something new, or to set us upon a path---while others are meant to be woven permanently into the fiber of our lives. While I wanted him to be more, I think that Martin was simply a friend for a season/reason.

I'm glad you still think there are "millions" out there who may be my Lifetime companion. Now if I can only find him!

Sorry for the late reply on this one..u didn't bore me I like reading about u. The 29 yr old sounds quite ugly on the inside. I cant stand people like that. Reminds me of school days..where there was always 'the beautiful mean girls' who would always torment the less attractive less privileged kids. Really good you gave him a piece of ur mind lol. At least he felt bad afterwards. Kind of scary to think of a doctor acting in such an immature manner...I think he was more concerned he upset u more than anything else. Oh well I hope he learnt something from it. Did you ever keep in touch with him?

Rings a bell that saying about friends..I agree with u that he was for a season/reason.. if he did base someones value on there appearance so much then I'm sure u can do better. U deserve someone less shallow.

What state are u in? I'm sure there must be some man draught where u are! That or you really have been hiding! :)