around 2007 and it wasnt the worst YET
around 2007 and it wasnt the worst YET
Comments (10)
495284 tn?1333894042
dominosarah, Dec 08, 2011
Is this you?
242912 tn?1660619837
Jade59, Dec 08, 2011
Oh, J34.  I don't mind saying, this photo shocked me.  I am SO glad you're with us today! ♥
498385 tn?1362449404
j34, Dec 08, 2011
Yes it is me.Or rather an empty shell at that time
498385 tn?1362449404
j34, Dec 08, 2011
For sure it shocked me as well, and like I said I was still looking not bad , soon after this I had open sores all over my face back feet and body eating out of garbage cans, no sock, underware , food,I was near death and my higher power lifted me up , Am forever grateful!
242912 tn?1660619837
Jade59, Dec 08, 2011
I also don't mind telling you, I am in tears for the person in this photo - what you must of gone through.  
495284 tn?1333894042
dominosarah, Dec 08, 2011
I am grateful too that you made it out alive.  We became friends in April-May of 2008 and you had told me about some of this but i had no idea how bad it was.  You are beautiful now, both inside and out~~~
498385 tn?1362449404
j34, Dec 08, 2011
yes it has been awhile Sara thanks for still being here. And to Jade whew I feel for that woman too. am trying to break down the walls that woman imprisioned me in, it is taking a long time but have made leaps and bounds ,thanks for reminding me !
242912 tn?1660619837
Jade59, Dec 08, 2011
Hi, J. I'm telling you, no matter how many times I've clicked on your photos since yesterday, I will Never get used to seeing you like that.  And I can't get out of my mind, you saying you weren't *looking bad yet.*  I know your photos well - I've had the pleasure of looking through them many times in the last 3yrs and you haven't left my mind since I first commented last night.  Yes, by the Grace of God, for sure.  You are one strong lady, J.  God touches many, but they don't always listen.  You were listening and from the sounds of it, just in time.  

I met a woman in rehab in 88.  She ended up looking only something like your photo at the end of our relationship.  I did not have one single clue about slamming speedballs or anything like that.  I asked her about the scab on the back of her hand upon seeing her out of jail for the first time..."oh, I just hit it on something."  Um, yeah.  I thought I could help that woman.  I had to give up on her after a year - I couldn't take the stress and worry anymore.  She wasn't ready and I've always wondered if she is still alive.  

I think you were hugely brave to post this picture.  It's made me think a lot.  You are also a prime example of the benefits and reason for "Aftercare." :)  Big congrats to you on all your clean days!!!!!! ♥
498385 tn?1362449404
j34, Dec 08, 2011
Yes it was either  keep on the way I was or find a new way of life,I had to admit to my innermost self, that I WAS an addict and I could not ingest one! It helped with the doctors opinion in the BIg Book of aa , when it explains the disease we have and the na book stated that I had a disease not a moral delemia what a relief,I had always thought there was something horribly wrong with me but there wasnt I was just sick and the Bill and bob some 70 yrs ago found a solution, trust god , clean house , and help others !
Yes it is hard to imagine , if you have never gone through it before!
Thanks for the messge , have a great night !
242912 tn?1660619837
Jade59, May 13, 2014
Hi J.  Just wanted to let you know, a few months after my post here I found my friend when I googled 'Find a Grave'.  She had passed away in 1997 in Northern CA...in the city I last knew her to be in.  She was only 37yrs old.  It was an odd feeling to wonder how she was for so many yrs only to find out she'd been dead all along.  It was sobering and difficult seeing her name on that grave.  I cried long and hard.  

I hope you're doing well, honey.  You look Great in your profile pic.  xo
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