Still fighting the beast...

[Hundin]

My daughter turned 15 in August and is now a sophomore in high school, and it is an everyday struggle to get her to do any school work or studying. She always plays the blame game when it comes to poor grades or teacher evauluations. She has got me at my wits end on how to help her get more interseted in school and take it serious. There is nothing I have not done to help her. I am at a loss for what to do next. She just is not motivated. She is not maturing much as she gets older either, she is not keeping up with her peers on all levels. It seems she is just getting worse. She has just got her learners permit, and I am so nervous driving with her, and cannot help, but worry what it is going to be like when she gets her license. Having a child with ADHD is challenging, having a teenager with ADHD is pure hell. Her anger issues have escilated and her social relationships continue to be negative. She is poor at relationship building. If it dosen't have the word"me" in the sentence, she is uninterested in anything. We have always encouraged college and I worry with her failing classes, that she won't get her credits in to graduate. I feel like I am at a loss. I know it may sound like I am a horrible mother, but this disorder has been so difficult to deal with over the years, and it just seems like it is over powering me, and I seem to be the only one at home so concerned, any advice?

[Sandman2]

   Kids with ADHD really struggle in school.  After a while, this constant battle begins to take a toll.  Many times the consequences are what you now are seeing.  Some kids are bright enough that  they are able to make it through elementary school and middle school before the load just gets to much.  Basically, they get tired of banging their head against the wall and getting nothing but a headache in return - so they make a decision to stop doing what hurts - they opt out, give up, and sometimes turn to drugs to further mask their problems.
   You never said if your daughter was on meds.  One of the reasons parents go to meds is so there children can survive in school.  If she is on meds, you need to check the dosage, it doesn't seem to be working.  
   I am curious how she did in school the last two years.  Is it a continuation of the same pattern - then it should be expected to continue and get worse as school gets harder.  If this is something new, then something has changed and that needs to be figured out.  It could be that the curriculum is finally over her head, and she can't deal with it.
   All in all, you need to get proactive.  This situation will not get better unless something is changed.  You daughter (and perhaps you) really needs to understand this ADHD thing and what it is doing to her.  You can't fight something that you don't understand.  
  
You might also search this forum for other parents with the same problems.  You are certainly not alone - and you don't want to do this alone.  You definitely want to talk to the highschool counselors just to alert them.  I would also ask them if they know of any good psychologists who deal with teenagers.
   Good Luck!!!

[Stphmy6]

Hi, I donot have teenagers yet but I will. I was diagnosed with ADD when I was younger and I believe they misdiagnosed me. I have Bi Polar. The symptoms of ADD and Bi polar are similar and the diagnosis can be misdiagnosed. I have taken meds for ADD and I like them but they are not good for me. I would be concerned about her anger and social issues. I had that for so long and then they diagnosed me correctly and were able to put me on medication that actually works. I am now a full time student, enjoying school. My thoughts are orginized, I donot have the rage I felt before and it feels good. I like my new life. As for your daughter I hope you can figure out how to help her. You might want to get second opinions and work on getting her better. Does she want to get better?