I hear you. Hopefully, we can find something a bit more productive in the long run then crying :)
One thing that I noticed when I was at the elementary school level was that many times kids with ADHD (undiagnosed and unmedicated) tended to attract attention with their hyperactivity. Kids just thought them to be kind of weird and reacted to them inappropriately. This really did change once the child started medication and the hyperactivity and impulsiveness slowed down.
I remember Specialmom's son who has sensory processing disorder had a horrible time in 2nd grade and a miserable time making friends because he did many unappropriated things. Once he was diagnosed with SPD and began to get help from the OT, Specialmom began to work on the friends thing. If I remember correctly she would set up playdates and closely monitor them to help her son learn how to interact. Since he tended to get up close to people she would work with him on spacing etc. You might want to post on her forum-
http://www.medhelp.org/forums/Sensory-Integration-Disorder-SID/show/1396 and ask her for some suggestions on setting up playdates etc.
Point being that your son probably has some behaviors that he has learned that might need to be (and can be) changed. His school teacher might be helpful here in suggesting things that can be worked on at home.
And yes, I do think the adderall xr is worth trying. It really is the same (does the same) thing as a regular adderall- it just lasts longer. What is it that makes you want to go to the regular adderall? Do you think he was being over medicated?
If you would like to start a new post and maybe tell me something about your son (age, grade, etc). I also might be able to suggest ways to help him. I have some very good "link" resources.