Does my son have Aspergers, or something else?

[mummytulip]

My son is 5, and has been struggling abit for awhile now, although only seems to have gotten worse in the last month.  At first I thought it was just the circumstances (I left his father about a year ago now due to domestic violence and he has only seen his dad once since we left).  Then I thought it was just behavioral, but his doctor thought it might be a mild form of aspergers.  Here is abit of run down.
97th percentile in weight and height.
Very social, although loves playing with everyone, tends to be better in a one on one situation, and tends to be a follower, and wanting to be friends with everyone, even those that hurt him.
Emotional - One minute is happy as anything, and will be excessively happy, then the next minute crying, or angry, clingy.
Undecisiveness - Wants something, then doesn't want it, wants it, then doesn't want it.  
Disruptiveness - gets bored very easily and can get very disruptive when at school and doesn't want to sit still and listen.
Inteligent - We have been told by many professionals, doctors, teachers, etc that he is very smart.  Will answer anything you ask, with a lot of description.  
Eye Contact - Will talk to you and answer your questions, but wont ever do eye contact.  If I make him look me in the eyes whilst I talk to him, he can't do it.  
Organised - He likes to have his toys lined up abit, or doing similar things.  He is scared of some of his toys sometimes, and will hide them, although tending to get happier with them over time, he is absolutely petrified of one particular toy, and he dreams about this toy hurting him, and being scary.  

This is all I can put through on a small dot by dot thing.  There is so much more to add.

[Rebecca_L]

A lot of what you describe falls into the autism/asperger's spectrum but the only way to know is to have him evaluated by a professional with experience with autism and asperger's. I think that it would be beneficial for you to take a look at some of the information about and resources for asperger's and autism because they will give you tips that will help regardless of your son's diagnosis. If he is socially inept, regardless of what it ends up being called, programs to teach social awareness will benefit him. If he is very resistant to eye contact then a desensitization program might help. (Have him look you in the eye and count to five using "one, one thousand, two, one thousand and gradually increase the time up to about ten seconds. I actually taught myself eye contact using that method and most people don't realize I have Asperger's through casual contact with me.)

[Rachel Thompson, Ph.D., BCBA]

As you may know, Asperger's Disorder is characterized by social deficits and restricted/repetitive behavior patterns. It is important to recognize that many typically developing children show some behavior that is consistent with autism spectrum disorders (e.g, some children are less social or more interested in an ordered environment). Nevertheless, I recommend that you discuss your concerns with your pediatrician who will be able to evaluate your son based on a fuller picture. It is important to identify all developmental issues early so that the proper intervention can begin.

[TINA723]

Hi everyone, my experience might help you.  My daughter is now diagnosed as having Aspergers, but I can tell you it was a battle from the ages of 5 till 10, until I got someone to listen. Like you all I knew my daughter was struggling, she couldn't talk and was not able to look at me, was clumsy, was extremely quiet and will sit in the corner by herself playing with her toy. She was not responding to any stimuli we would provide. when she attended primary school, she became the opposite, loud, nervy, biting her nails, over familiar with people, did not understand safety issues, interaction with others became more strained, isolation etc, she became obnoxious, rude, no boundaries even though they were taught to her, whats right an wrong. Highly emotional, outbursts etc. eventually I had enough and decided it was going to be a warfare with Authorities to get help and support for a child I knew was struggling, we all knew she had special needs, but what extent. I insisted she spoke to a Child Psychologist, Doctors etc., I asked specifically to get her analyzed for ASD, eventually it all made sense, we did a test I answered questions, and she was finally diagnosed, as soon as this happened what a relief, now she has the support she needs. I think because society is only now waking up to Aspergers, it is slow in offering tests, and support, for now parents have to insist and fight for what is their right which is to have the kids seen be professional, we have to do the leg work, and we have to make sure they listen, find ways for them to listen, do our research well and take to them, unfortunately, these people dont know everything, because they dont know our children, we have to be sure of ourselves before we can assure others of what is going on with our kids.
So keep fighting for what you know and what rightly belongs to you, which is ANSWERS.

[nitsrik]

read about you and your son. I have been going into school knowing that there is a problem with my 8yr old daughter but have always left feeling as though i am a paranoid parent. You know your own child. Dont give up. My daughter was referred to cams for a diagnoses. I was told that they don;t like giving children 'tags' or 'labells' so when my daughter refused to speak and ended up in floods of tears i was told she was suffering high levels of anxiety and play therepy would help. I know my daughter is too anxious for her age. I know there is something not quite right  -  so when is somebody going to help mums like us. Its so infuriating - I will keep going though till i seek the right help.