I'm sorry I really needed to vent. This is the only place I felt safe enough to do it.
You are totally welcome to vent! Can I ask why you feel that it is not okay to cry? Crying is a major part of grieving and healing! People can be so thoughtless but I have come to the realization that they are like that because they feel like they need to say something but are clueless on what to say!
Are you seeing a counselor or attending a support group? These outlets are so healthy and they would give you another place to vent! I needed to talk... To just put my thoughts out in the open! It was then I began to hear my sadness and I learned how to cope and understand.
I am here if you need an ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on!
Go have a good cry and talk to that sweet angel!
I have to be strong for my family. My kids look to me for strength and my fianc'ee has been just a mess since Ryan passed. I haven't seen a counselor I can't afford one. I've looked for a support group in my area I haven't found one. I can't talk to my fianc'ee he acts as if I don't have the right to talk about our son. I talk to my mom but she really doesn't understand but she lets me talk when I need to cause she feels I need to get it out. I really don't like unloading on her because she I see it in her face that I'm hurting her. I know it hurts her cause as a parent it hurts to see your kids in pain and you can't do anything about. When my son died that was the 1st time I eva saw my parents cry. My dad is just now getting to a point where he can look at me without crying. That hurts to so I just keep it in and try to smile when all I really want to do is brake down. I just want to curl up in a ball and never come out some times but that's just not possible.
Crying is healthy and it is one of the most important steps to healing! Let your children know it is okay to cry and that Mommy is hurting.
It sounds like your DF is trying to put on a brave face too! You guys would really benefit in talking with someone. Perhaps, someone at your church.
Your parents sound so kind! Keep talking to your Mom, she may not fully understand but at least she is letting you talk!
Start a journal and get those thoughts out! Releasing the pain is not letting go of our baby, it is actually given us a deeper connection!
Thank you for sharing this with me! I am here to listen!