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Tell us about your Angel!
My little Angels name is Cooper. He was born on June 6th, 2008. He was born with a heart condition called HLHS. We found out about his condition at his 18 wk ultrasound. Of course our world was shattered but we were prepared to fight!
The day after Cooper was born he was taken to Children's Hospital. It was there that we met the most amazing nurses and doctors. We could not have asked for more loving people. After two weeks in the NICU, Cooper underwent his first open-heart surgery. Sadly things did not go so well so they had to operate a total of three more times. On July 23rd his doctors told us that he was not going to make it and we had to make a decision. I was not prepared for this at all. Thankfully my brave little Angel made this decision for us. He was in my arms the last time he took his last breath. His chest was still open from his surgery and I could see his little heart stop beating. At that point my world had ended. I was ready to leave this world and be with him again.
It has been a little over a year since my little man became an Angel and I know he has never left my side. Through the help of my husband, my family, my counselor and my support group, I can now smile again! Cooper blessed us with so much! He even gave us his little brother! Cruz Cooper was born on August 11th, 2009! This little guy will grow up to know all about the love and hope his brother brought into this world!!!
I have plenty of pictures of Cooper on my profile page, so feel free to look at my beautiful little angel!
Thank you for reading my story and thank you for sharing yours with me!
The day after Cooper was born he was taken to Children's Hospital. It was there that we met the most amazing nurses and doctors. We could not have asked for more loving people. After two weeks in the NICU, Cooper underwent his first open-heart surgery. Sadly things did not go so well so they had to operate a total of three more times. On July 23rd his doctors told us that he was not going to make it and we had to make a decision. I was not prepared for this at all. Thankfully my brave little Angel made this decision for us. He was in my arms the last time he took his last breath. His chest was still open from his surgery and I could see his little heart stop beating. At that point my world had ended. I was ready to leave this world and be with him again.
It has been a little over a year since my little man became an Angel and I know he has never left my side. Through the help of my husband, my family, my counselor and my support group, I can now smile again! Cooper blessed us with so much! He even gave us his little brother! Cruz Cooper was born on August 11th, 2009! This little guy will grow up to know all about the love and hope his brother brought into this world!!!
I have plenty of pictures of Cooper on my profile page, so feel free to look at my beautiful little angel!
Thank you for reading my story and thank you for sharing yours with me!
Oh Tricia, I too pray for you daily. I don't know what to say except I love you my friend and hope that in time you find peace again. XOXO Amanda
Tricia, I pray every night for you. I pray for God to comfort you and to bless you with another baby. It is so heartwarming to hear the others stories of surviving and their angels blessing them again. I pray God and baby Ian can do the same for you. My heart still aches for you.
You are all wonderful women.
You are all wonderful women.
Just wanted to say...I'm not yet ready to share the story of my angel (although some of you already know it). But, I truly hope to one day be happy again like you three seem to be. I, too, want another baby to pour all of this baby love I have into - but I don't think it's going to happen. Unfortunately, I had a tubal when Ian was born in July. I am considering getting it reversed - but that is not 100% successful. Anyway...I will write the whole story about Ian some time - just not tonight. My loss is still very new (three weeks today) and today I am hurting so badly I just want to die. My eyes are stinging and swollen from crying to long today, and I feel like a hollow shell of the person I used to be. Please pray for me, ladies...I need all the help I can get.
Tricia
Tricia
What a beautiful story for a beautiful Angel. Your love for Kayln is strong and it will forever be felt by others..............especially that precious little Adalynn in your belly.
Thank you for sharing!
Thank you for sharing!
My little Angel's name is Kayln. After going through a m/c in Dec. 2005, we were suprised to find out we were pregnant again at our RE's office the first month we went! No medicine even needed, a complete suprise! I went to have a HSG test done to find out why we weren't pregnant yet after almost a year, and to everyone's suprise, during the test, there was a sac in my uterus! My RE rushed me over to his office where a pregnancy test and u/s were done! And there on the screen was my little peanut, with her heart just beating away! I'll never forget that day, it was the happiest day of my life! Although we were told to be cautious b/c of the threat of m/c now (because of the dye) we remained optimistic, and she was a fighter, she held on!
At 35 weeks, I started to have contractions at work, so I immediately called my doctor and of course talked to the nurse instead. She told me it was BH, and to go home and lay down, that it was normal. So it being my first delivery, I listened, and they did go away. The next day, I felt fine so I went to work. My vision became very, very blurred and the lights seemed SO bright, like I was staring right at the sun. (Later, I came to learn this was a sign of what happened to our baby.) It only lasted for a few minutes, and then everything returned to normal. I had no idea what to think, and stupidly did not call my doctor...
Two days later, it was our work Christmas party, December 16th. I woke up that morning, on my own, which I immediately thought odd because usually Kayln woke me up. I just assumed she was still sleeping, so I went on about my day and started to clean the house. When I would sit down for mini-breaks, she still was not moving. And then I really thought that was odd, because she always moved when I sat down... But again, didn't call my doctor... By 5:00 that night, I still hadn't felt her move, so I called the ER. They told me to drink some soda to get her moving, which didn't work b/c soda makes me sick so I could only drink a few sips. A couple hours later, we decided it was time to go to the ER, and we recieved the worst news of our lives! They rushed us up to L&D, put the contraction belt and h/b belt on my belly, and there was no h/b! An u/s confirmed that our sweet Kayln was no longer alive. My husband and I were devestated, words can't even describe the feeling you have when a doctor you don't even know looks right at you and tells you your baby has died! I think it took a second for it to really sink in, and then I jumped right up and screamed and begged the doctor to do something!! He said there was nothing they could do. Right then and there, my heart stopped beating. Someone had physically reached into my body, took it out and threw it on the floor, and then stomped it to peices!
They induced me that night, and Kayln was born the next day, Dec 17, 2007 at 4:15, with the cord wrapped around her neck twice and a very, very tight knot in it. I was honestly scared what my reaction would be when I saw her. I think most of all, I was scared to see my husband's reaction. I was scared we wouldn't want to hold her, that it would be too hard... As soon as she came out, they took her over to her little bed and cleaned her off. My doctor looked at me, and asked me if I wanted to hold her but my hands were instinctly already out waiting for her to bring her to me! She was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen! I just couldn't believe how from one look at her, I was SO in love and amazingly, SO happy! I FINALLY was able to hold my baby, who looked like she was just sleeping! She was perfect in every way! We were able to keep her in our room for 8 hours, get lots of pictures and everyone got to hold her. It was definately a bitter-sweet day, and those 8 hours just went by too fast! I'll never forget when the nurse came in at midnight to take her, it was the worst feeling ever because I knew that I would never again be able to hold her! (Even though 2 days later at her funeral, I was able to hold her for an hour. It was the best feeling to be able to see her again, hold her and kiss her again!)
Grieving has of course been the worst part. I will never get over the loss of our baby, never! She is always in my heart! I begged God to bless us again right after we lost her, not to replace HER but to replace this emptiness I felt, but he had other plans! I think Kayln finally convinced him it was time, because we are now 27 1/2 weeks pregnant with her little sister, Adalynn Noelle! Our prayers have finally been answered, and I thank God every day for our new blessing, but am fearful that history will repeat itself. I just continue to put my trust in God, and can only pray that he will comfort me and let us keep this baby here on earth. I know Kayln is watching over us and her little sister! I guess we'll never know why things like this happen, but I know it only happens to the people who are strong enough to go through it... Kayln, mommy and daddy love you so much! We think about you every day! You were the best gift we could've ever recieved! You are truely our miracle! Sleep tight, sweetheart! Love, mommy and daddy
Thank you for letting me share Kayln! This is a wonderful idea! I only wish I could've had a site like this to go to after losing her, but am thankful that there is now for other women who are grieving the loss of their angel, and for women like us who have already gone through it, and still will always feel the heartache of our losses. Even though we are at a different stage in our grieving, it will never truely disappear, so again I'm thankful that I now have somewhere to openly share our sweet Kayln!! I too have pictures of her on my profile. Please feel free to look!
At 35 weeks, I started to have contractions at work, so I immediately called my doctor and of course talked to the nurse instead. She told me it was BH, and to go home and lay down, that it was normal. So it being my first delivery, I listened, and they did go away. The next day, I felt fine so I went to work. My vision became very, very blurred and the lights seemed SO bright, like I was staring right at the sun. (Later, I came to learn this was a sign of what happened to our baby.) It only lasted for a few minutes, and then everything returned to normal. I had no idea what to think, and stupidly did not call my doctor...
Two days later, it was our work Christmas party, December 16th. I woke up that morning, on my own, which I immediately thought odd because usually Kayln woke me up. I just assumed she was still sleeping, so I went on about my day and started to clean the house. When I would sit down for mini-breaks, she still was not moving. And then I really thought that was odd, because she always moved when I sat down... But again, didn't call my doctor... By 5:00 that night, I still hadn't felt her move, so I called the ER. They told me to drink some soda to get her moving, which didn't work b/c soda makes me sick so I could only drink a few sips. A couple hours later, we decided it was time to go to the ER, and we recieved the worst news of our lives! They rushed us up to L&D, put the contraction belt and h/b belt on my belly, and there was no h/b! An u/s confirmed that our sweet Kayln was no longer alive. My husband and I were devestated, words can't even describe the feeling you have when a doctor you don't even know looks right at you and tells you your baby has died! I think it took a second for it to really sink in, and then I jumped right up and screamed and begged the doctor to do something!! He said there was nothing they could do. Right then and there, my heart stopped beating. Someone had physically reached into my body, took it out and threw it on the floor, and then stomped it to peices!
They induced me that night, and Kayln was born the next day, Dec 17, 2007 at 4:15, with the cord wrapped around her neck twice and a very, very tight knot in it. I was honestly scared what my reaction would be when I saw her. I think most of all, I was scared to see my husband's reaction. I was scared we wouldn't want to hold her, that it would be too hard... As soon as she came out, they took her over to her little bed and cleaned her off. My doctor looked at me, and asked me if I wanted to hold her but my hands were instinctly already out waiting for her to bring her to me! She was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen! I just couldn't believe how from one look at her, I was SO in love and amazingly, SO happy! I FINALLY was able to hold my baby, who looked like she was just sleeping! She was perfect in every way! We were able to keep her in our room for 8 hours, get lots of pictures and everyone got to hold her. It was definately a bitter-sweet day, and those 8 hours just went by too fast! I'll never forget when the nurse came in at midnight to take her, it was the worst feeling ever because I knew that I would never again be able to hold her! (Even though 2 days later at her funeral, I was able to hold her for an hour. It was the best feeling to be able to see her again, hold her and kiss her again!)
Grieving has of course been the worst part. I will never get over the loss of our baby, never! She is always in my heart! I begged God to bless us again right after we lost her, not to replace HER but to replace this emptiness I felt, but he had other plans! I think Kayln finally convinced him it was time, because we are now 27 1/2 weeks pregnant with her little sister, Adalynn Noelle! Our prayers have finally been answered, and I thank God every day for our new blessing, but am fearful that history will repeat itself. I just continue to put my trust in God, and can only pray that he will comfort me and let us keep this baby here on earth. I know Kayln is watching over us and her little sister! I guess we'll never know why things like this happen, but I know it only happens to the people who are strong enough to go through it... Kayln, mommy and daddy love you so much! We think about you every day! You were the best gift we could've ever recieved! You are truely our miracle! Sleep tight, sweetheart! Love, mommy and daddy
Thank you for letting me share Kayln! This is a wonderful idea! I only wish I could've had a site like this to go to after losing her, but am thankful that there is now for other women who are grieving the loss of their angel, and for women like us who have already gone through it, and still will always feel the heartache of our losses. Even though we are at a different stage in our grieving, it will never truely disappear, so again I'm thankful that I now have somewhere to openly share our sweet Kayln!! I too have pictures of her on my profile. Please feel free to look!
Thank you so much for sharing. Your story made me cry all over again. God Bless Baby Angel Aidyn!
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