4 year old issues

[holster222]

My 4 year old daughter is so fresh.  She talks back and basically does not listen to one thing I say.  I have no idea how to reverse this behavior.  Is this normal behavior, or is this something that we created in the family?  I have to say that I am a person with a short temper and I am afraid that it is because of me that she is like this.  Do you have any ideas on how I can help her?  She is also taking things and hiding them on people.  How can I stop this as well?  Any advice would be great.  

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

You've already figured it out. It is your behavior management skills that are the problem, including your difficulty maintaining your equanimity. See my response to "Help with 4 year old" and folllow the suggestion. You are experiencing precisely the same problem that the other family is experiencing.

[holster222]

You gave me some sound advice regarding my 4 year old.  Now what should I do as a parent with behavior management issues, so that I can help my daughter with her behavioral skills?  Therapy?  Books?   I just want to raise a happy child, and I do not want to create the same issues on to my 2 year old as well.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Apply the strategies you'll find in SOS and you'll be fine. It's sound behavior management that's called for, not therapy.