Our 4.5 yr old

[towzer]

Folks my wife and I have a beautiful little boy we adopted about 3.5 yrs ago
He was a preemie at only 960 grams
He has caught up a lot on his weight and height and is now in the 30th percentile
He is in school and one of the things that keeps coming up is time outs

He is getting ( usually one daily ) from the teachers

My wife and I have sought help through a Psychologist who has met him a few times
She basically has ruled out any ADD, ADHD etc

My wife and I are seeing her again in 2 weeks but in the meantime is there anything we can do to help
He does get the odd time out at home but otherwise is excellent

I know that the other kids get time outs as well but he just seems to get a lot more than them and the teacher told him today any more time outs he gets taken to the Principals office
Just curious as why he is getting them more than others

He is very bright, can read now, won the spelling bee competition etc etc

Any thoughts???

[tejodouro]

Maybe he is not ready for school and might be better to stay home with mom or grandma. He can be exposed to social events by going to the park and taking small classes such as martial arts or soccer.  After all he was a premi.  4 year old is too young to take to a doctor for ADD.  If he is talking and is social without any symptoms of autism, I am not sure why you are taking him to a psychologist at this age, most of all if he behaves at home and in other social situations.  He probably is not ready for school or needs a school with less restrictions. Not all schools are the same.  Good luck.

[towzer]

Thanks for reply

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

This does not sound like an alarming situation at all, but rather typical four-year-old behavior that invites straightforward limit-setting (e.g., use of time out). I do not see any need for use of the principal's office,as might be appropriate if, e.g., he were being aggressive or defiant.

[towzer]

Hi Kevin
Its a myriad of things

Sometimes its not listening as he can be playing with something in the room that is not related to what the teacher is trying to get all the other kids to do so he gets a time out

It seems to me just typical 4 yr old behavior
Nothing violent

One time it was for talking with another kid while another child was up doing reading class

Just silly stuff but its getting to the point that he is getting a lot more than the other kids
Some days he gets no time outs
Some days he gets 1 or 2

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Having a single time out daily does not really invite alarm. The key issue is the behavior that is prompting the time outs. Time out is the consequence, not the cause. What is he doing that results in the discipline?