Please Help!

[atonya28]

Hi,my name is Tony I am a soon to be RN and a mother to two sons ages 7 and 9. The problem we are experiencing is with my seven year old (Cody).Cody has a terrible temper, he has sudden outbursts of anger if things don't go his way, he also does this yelling noise over and over whenever he is upset,thething I am most concerned about is that recently he has began saying things like, I hate God, I want to kill you (to his brother), I am going to get a knife and stab myself, him, you etc, I wish I had a different mother. I am beside myself and deeply concerned! He is very manipulative, I don'tunderstand how that is possible in a 7 yr old, but he is! We are a Cristian family and have always strived to make our home balanced and happy. We have a struggle from sun u to sun down and I don't know how or what to do. Cody can be a very loving child,but lately it seems he is only loving when he wants something from us, and when we say NO a nightmare unfolds, this happens daily. He keeps everyone on eggshells, he starts talking like a baby when he wants to be loving or wants something, will go into an outburst of anger a few minutes later. Cody has recently taken to punching, kicking, hrowing things at his brother and at his Dad when he is angry with them. I am seeking any advice on how to handle this situation. I find myself lately not being able to even enjoy being around my child! I Love my son and I want to get help for him, us. I just need some guidance on what the problem may be. I have cried, prayed,and placed the guilt upon myself, for spoiling him, I worked a lotwhen he was an infant and toddler, and I feel quilty for being gone, during his informative years.Please help, any advice you can offer will be greatly appreciated.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

The one thing you have not done is arrange professional intervention. You should have your son evaluated by a pediatric menatl health professional for the purpose(s) of (a) considering the presence of emotional disturbance, and (b) obtaining consultation re: parenting/behavior management. Re: the latter, while you are arranging the evaluation, take a look at Lynn Clark's book SOS Help for Parents (see www.sosprograms.com).

[atonya28]

Thank you so much for the advice!