VERY ANXIOUS 9 year old girl

[ESinVA]

My 9 year old  granddaughter is normally a very easy going child, always pleasant and well behaved.   Apparently it was noticed in earlier years by caregivers that she lacks self confidence.  Now in third grade, this lack has become a real issue.  She will suddenly say

[Annalise]

I can't add anything to the discussion about her anxiety, but perhaps I CAN help you with the bike-riding.  My eight-year-old son was the same way.  He fell and knocked some teeth out when he was a toddler, and he was deathly afraid of learning to ride a bike without training wheels.  So I bought him a Razor scooter over the summer, figuring it would help him with his balance. By this fall, he was very adept at balancing and turning, and I pointed out to him that if he could handle the scooter, he could ride a bike without training wheels.  He was scared and wobbly the first ten minutes, and I had to help him.  Then he just took off on his own on the bike and is now happily riding all the time.  Since I had also given my five-year-old daughter a scooter, I weaned her off training wheels a few weeks ago as well.  Hopes this helps.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

A clinical psychologist or pediatric clinical social worker would be appropriate choices.

[ESinVA]

Thank you for your advice.  I wondered though if you could recommend a clinician (what specialty) one would consult in cases like this.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

There is no substitute for successful experiences when it comes to a child developing a sense of confidence and positive self regard. Now, even though they are successful, some children have such high (even perfectionistic) standards or expectations, that they create problems for themselves. Ths may be the case with your granddaughter. There's not much that you can do directly about this. It is important to keep exposing her to age-typical experiences, particularly with her peer group. You might consider arranging a bit of counseling so that a clinician can investigate the issue of her internal life (including perfectioninstic tendencies) and see if this aspect of her functioning is in good shape.