Depression or is it?

[suezsad]

Hi I'm not sure how serious this is, but I am 54 yrs old and recently went through a breakup with a man I lived with for 6yrs. It was wonderful but it ended-he just couldn't commit.  It was such a shock to everyone including me but I decided to carry on and moved out immediately. I have a good job-same one for over 10 years in insurance sales, not wealthy by any means so it's a bit of a struggle but not that bad. I just can't seem to get over this and I am feeling down all the time now, I seemed to be doing okay for awhile but now it's worse. I have some stress from work, my kids whom are older but you know -still create their own problems which become yours.  Because of my job I am not that close in distance to my immediate family-two sisters, and my parents are older and  live a distance away and I don't want to let them know I'm not doing so good lately. I am not a really social person and my best girlfriend has moved far away.  My kids are good kids but they count on me for support, so I guess I don't let them know either how much this is affecting me.  I looked for a support group but this is small town and I couln't find any, also tried volunteer work which I could do when I'm not a work _i work about 45 hrs per week. but I haven't gotten a response from anyone yet. Again it's a smaller town>  Just feeling horribly hopeless and unable to cope with the slightest bit of added stress. I wanted to book an appt with my doctor-who is booked up for 2 months but I don\t know what to say.  I am scared of sinking into a hole I can't climb out of and my life is certainly not that bad at all, if only I could see it that way.  Thanks whoever is reading this, it felt a little better just typing this out. Somewhat.    

[Jaquta]

I know what you mean.  I often feel better for just venting.  The doctor said it did seem to help me especially when at the end of it I came back to reality.  I think talking about issues just makes them that much more manageable.  Maybe because for just a brief moment you can put down your load (before picking it up again).
It does sound as though you may have progressed more towards depression.
Could you contact the doctor's surgery and express your concerns and if they are unable to offer you an earlier appointment ask for alternate options?

I'm from a very small community too so I can understand what that feels like.
Although not ideal, if you are unable to access support in your own area are you able to go a little further afield.
Other options could include being honest about how you're feeling with your relatives.  Maybe looking for support groups on the internet.  Again, probably not ideal but better than nothing (and some are actually pretty good).

The doctor here also has a self-help program you might like to access.  His website is myvirtualshrink.com.  He has mentioned a free 3 day trial so you might also like to take advantage of that.  I think it would still be available but I'm not sure.

The doctor and other members may have other suggestions.

I hope you're able to start getting some answers and start moving forward again.

[Roger Gould, M.D.]

You are describing a normal response to a tough life transition. You seem to be doing all the right things, which is to reestablish your life structure and move forward. But you also have to grieve the loss, which you have probably put off and are now dealing with. Some therapy would be helpful to get you through this, and possibly some antidepressants from your doctor on a temporary basis.  You could also get some additional help at my alternative to therapy site...www. myvirtualshrink.com