Depression has changed

[Mommak5677]

Hello,
I have suffered from depression since I can remember (age 6, I am now 45).  I have been on every med out there.  I have a history of servere major depression  and 10 yrs past was diag w/ mania.  I have had many (unsuccessful) suicide attempts.  As of late I am getting anxious and afraid of most things. I know my body/mind very well.  I know when drugs are starting to "wear out".  I have been under Dr.'s care since I was 12.  I am fatigued, depressed , awake suicidal and lacking enjoyment.  I do not work due to mania hitting when I try to.  I care for my granddaughter 3-4 days a week.  Something is different, my head feels fuzzy... my memory is is not so hot (that's if I remember correctly-he-he) I have no desire to eat.
my meds right now are... klonopin, trazadone 300 mgs (down from 600 a year ago) lithium 300 2x a day, ambien ( i do not take all the time as I feel it does not work well). What is your opinion?? I am not menopausal.

[Zeid]

Hi Mommak5677,

Everyone has fears from bad things cos they lead to death as a maximum result. Let's think about it, we are all going to die one day. This is life. Some people believe that there is another life after this life, others believe not so it's like some day we are all going to discover this but some of us are enjoying life till that moment others are afraid of life till that moment and if you ask me which one I choose I'll tell you to enjoy life till that time which is easier to kill the time not your self. Do something that you like even if you don't finish what you are doing, do another thing and so on. It's all in your hands to make it better for you and for people who love you.

Take care,

Zeid

[Mommak5677]

Thank you for taking the time to get back to me.
I have spoken to my Dr. and he put me on the wellbutrin last week.  I know it may take several weeks to work.  I also speak to someone on a daily basis.  The constant pani and fear that something bad is going to happen is what the biggest change is happening.  I feel like I am headed for a nervous breakdown.

[Roger Gould, M.D.]

I am sure you know your own mind/body well, and you should respond to that accordinly. That means you have to tell your doctor that you are sure you need a medication adjustment, and also ask about some life counseling so that you are not entirely reliant on medication to control your depression.