Post Traumatic Stress Disorder/Anxiety?

[olivmorgan]

I am 28/female.  Never had any major health problems, just the occasional cold/flu.  

I live approximately 2400 miles from my parents so I only get to see them maybe 2-3 times/year.  On December 9th, my parents were supposed to come see me for the holidays.  Instead, I received a phone call informing me that my mom had been in a horrible car crash and was air lifted to the hospital.  I went through a couple days of not knowing if she would live or die, calling my dad ever few minutes to get updates.  I felt so helpless.  She went through numerous surgeries, one being due to an aneurysm that they found.  I flew down to see her 2 days after the accident and at that time she was in ICU in a drug induced coma.  She was in the hospital for 2 months, but finally pulled through and just recently made it back home.

The reason I am giving these details is because since this accident, I constantly have had thoughts that something is wrong with me.  I always feel sick and CONSTANTLY looking up symptoms and causes for every little pain/abnormality I have and worrying myself sick over what I find.  Bumps I've had my whole life I suddenly think are cancer.  I found a tiny (and I mean tiny) freckle/mole on my back that I never noticed before and suddenly think I have skin cancer.  
I don't know what is wrong with me.  I am driving myself and my husband crazy because I am constantly poking at myself and feeling for lumps/bumps and telling him to look as well.  I feel like it's taking over my life.  I can't concentrate on anything because I'm always thinking I'm sick.  Why am I feeling this way?  Is it PTSD?  What can I do to make myself stop these thoughts that something is wrong and start enjoying my life with my 2 beautiful baby girls?

[Roger Gould, M.D.]

I am sure I know what happened to you since I wrote a book on the subject of safety as distinct from the illusion of safey.  Your mother's accident and near death experience tore a big hole in your illusion of safety net.  You are already at that time of life when you start thinking about the mortality of your parents but that usually occurs gradually and incrementally.  In your case it happened all of a sudden it stimulated to all of your fears which on inspection you will see are irrational other than the base fear that you will lose a parent.  You might get some help from reading my book if you can find it in the library it is called transformations, grow change in adult life.   it would be helpful for you to talk with the professional therapist. you could  get the relief you need in  just a few sessions.

[olivmorgan]

Thank you so much Dr.  I will be looking for your book.

[boogieman]

Helllo. I don't know what specifically you may be experiencing, though it sounds like some kind of anxiety or obsessive-compulsive disorder. I   have ptsd, but my symptoms consist of flashbacks and extreme anxiety when in places that I relate to the initial trauma. It would be best to see a psych professional who may reccomend meds, therapy or both, as well as giving you a specific diagnosis. Take care, GM