I went for years trying to deny my condition. In some ways, diabetes is like knowing you are dying, there are periods of grief just realizing we have this. The good news is, we can change our direction, we can take charge of our bodies, and be even better, and help others to be like the rose, and not the thorns... Education, knowledge, and a desire to be the beautiful rose you we're meant to be! The first step is to want to live, face the facts, and be determined. Find a support system, and be your own best friend. Every moment counts, and WE have only to make wise choices, putting one foot in front of the other... I didn't come to this conclusion lightly, believe me. But know, it can be achieved.
Hi,
Welcome to the Diabetes community. I'd recommend (although you mention you really don't want to) speak with a health care professional who will be there to help you overcome your symptoms through treatment and diet/exercise most likely. I'm not a medically trained person, just a member who's mom has diabetes, but sounds like your body has symptoms now which only your doctor can diagnose for you.
J~