Aa
Do I tell?
Basic information
I was just diagnosed with Herpes type 2 in June of 2009. I have put myself in an awful situation. I have fallen in love with a man and not told him of my diagnosis. I think this happen because I am so scared of loosing him. I should have told him but I knew he would run. He constantly makes jokes about "herpes" and how he would NEVER date a women with any disease such as Herpes. We have been out and he has made comments like "Just shoot me and give me Herpes" as if it he would rather die than get this. He works with this disease on almost a daily basis and still holds the stigma that everyone else has~~~. I thought we were fine bc we had used condoms and I was on a antiviral suggested medication. Well ..............we have had unprotected sex many times in the last month. Before we had sex he asked me if I had anything. I lied and said no, as I had just been tested and on paper and everything was negative [because they do not routinely test for Herpes type 2]. What I did not tell him is mo earlier I tested + to a culture d/t a severe breakout.I feel like a terrible person and I am sure I am one bc I should tell him but he is the most loving, giving person I have ever met. I know without a doubt he WILL leave me if I tell him. He said once having a life long sexually disease is unacceptable.
Questions:
1. Am I in the minority for not wanting to tell? 80% of people who have Herpes type 2 don't even know they have it so although not moral why can't I pretend I am one of them. I know I can get sued; I know this is REALLY bad but I am scared. I love this man and don't want to loose him. I know I will from his past comments he has extreme fear.
2. Before I had herpes I was ALWAYS was irritated in the vagina area after sex and shaving. Now I ALWAYS have irritation and itching~ So how the heck do I know when to avoid sex!!!!! I currently am red and itching with read bumps. No blisters or sores. HELP
I was just diagnosed with Herpes type 2 in June of 2009. I have put myself in an awful situation. I have fallen in love with a man and not told him of my diagnosis. I think this happen because I am so scared of loosing him. I should have told him but I knew he would run. He constantly makes jokes about "herpes" and how he would NEVER date a women with any disease such as Herpes. We have been out and he has made comments like "Just shoot me and give me Herpes" as if it he would rather die than get this. He works with this disease on almost a daily basis and still holds the stigma that everyone else has~~~. I thought we were fine bc we had used condoms and I was on a antiviral suggested medication. Well ..............we have had unprotected sex many times in the last month. Before we had sex he asked me if I had anything. I lied and said no, as I had just been tested and on paper and everything was negative [because they do not routinely test for Herpes type 2]. What I did not tell him is mo earlier I tested + to a culture d/t a severe breakout.I feel like a terrible person and I am sure I am one bc I should tell him but he is the most loving, giving person I have ever met. I know without a doubt he WILL leave me if I tell him. He said once having a life long sexually disease is unacceptable.
Questions:
1. Am I in the minority for not wanting to tell? 80% of people who have Herpes type 2 don't even know they have it so although not moral why can't I pretend I am one of them. I know I can get sued; I know this is REALLY bad but I am scared. I love this man and don't want to loose him. I know I will from his past comments he has extreme fear.
2. Before I had herpes I was ALWAYS was irritated in the vagina area after sex and shaving. Now I ALWAYS have irritation and itching~ So how the heck do I know when to avoid sex!!!!! I currently am red and itching with read bumps. No blisters or sores. HELP
Does this mean that there is no hope for me? Does that number mean that I am more infectious to others than someone that has a greater than 4.5 for example?
I don't understand these numbers... As far as I know, I have never infected anyone except for my boyfriend many years ago when I did not know I had this. I rarely have outbreaks....so are you saying that no matter what....anytime I have sex the risk is very high for the person with whom I have sex regardless of any symptoms of an outbreak? This is dire news. I thought that I had a healthy perspective on living with herpes all of these years. I have been responsible all of these years and have dealt with it really well without it ruining my life or someone else's. Now I feel really tainted and think that maybe I should divorce and join a nunnery.
I'd appreciate your thoughts so that I may put this all back in the appropriate perspective where it should be.
I don't understand these numbers... As far as I know, I have never infected anyone except for my boyfriend many years ago when I did not know I had this. I rarely have outbreaks....so are you saying that no matter what....anytime I have sex the risk is very high for the person with whom I have sex regardless of any symptoms of an outbreak? This is dire news. I thought that I had a healthy perspective on living with herpes all of these years. I have been responsible all of these years and have dealt with it really well without it ruining my life or someone else's. Now I feel really tainted and think that maybe I should divorce and join a nunnery.
I'd appreciate your thoughts so that I may put this all back in the appropriate perspective where it should be.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
If your HSV 2 tests value is greater than 5, the that most certainly is a positive, you are both infected with HSV 2 and are able to infect others. Her interpretation of being "exposed sometime in the past" is true, but in complete. She makes it sounds as though that exposure may or may not have results in infection. She is incorrect. The exposure that you had in the past resulted in you being infected and you are infectious to others. I think she should revise her terms for accuracy.
Terri
Terri
Hi Terry, When I sent my post with the greater than, less than symbols only a portion of the message was sent. I am negative on hsv 1 with less than .9. hsv 2 is greater than 5.00. I know that I am positive but am wondering what the nurse meant when she said that this test just shows that I was exposed sometime in the past.
Thanks,
Thanks,
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
OK, so now I'm confused. Your one post says your HSV 1 was greater than 5, and your next post says your HSV 2 was greater than 5. Which of the results is greater than 5?
Terri
Terri
The results are not appearing. Maybe it is because of the less than greater than symbol. So I will spell it out. hsv1 is less than .9 and hsv 2 is greater then 5
Hi Terry, This is so strange, I sent it and it erased the vital part again when I sent. Let's try this one more time: HSV 1 5.00
You are reading content posted in the Herpes Forum
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
