I have an absolutely horrible 11 yr old son. I also have 2 other children as well as 2 stepchildren who have never made me feel like this or done anything like he has.
I left his abusive father when he was just a baby. I've been with my current husband for near 10 yrs. My son has been given every chance, opportunity and consequence imaginable.
First off, before anyone judges- I've tried with him. I've had early intervention, home services, positive reinforcements, reward charts etc. Nothing has helped or come close to working. I've had him in residential treatment and he liked it, looked at it like it was a resort. I've had him in day treatment, he has been in counseling since he was 6. He has even been admitted to the psychiatric hospital for 6 weeks, was there for 30 days and discharged only to be readmitted 10 days later for an additional 2 weeks.
My son basically plays all adults. He gives the answer he thinks people want to hear rather than tell the truth. He has been on several different medications and none have helped. He is a compulsive liar. He is a cleptomaniac, has been banned from multiple stores in our area. I can not take him into a store without him stealing. He has stolen from just about everyone in my family. He stole $80 from a teachers purse. We have contacted police to no avail, due to his age. He has sent my husband to the hospital multiple times with massive panic attacks and caused him to have cardiac problems. He is physically and verbally abusive to me. He has slapped, punched, bitten, kicked, thrown things at me, pushed me down stairs. He has even pulled a knife on me. He also has an unhealthy obsession with me. He thinks I'm his "girlfriend/property". On multiple occasions, he has flashed his penis at me or masturbated while staring at me. He taunts the other children and constantly tries to engage them in fights whether physically or verbally. My 15 year old daughter is so scared that she sleeps with a lock on her bedroom.
He is terribly jealous of my dogs as they were gifts to me from my husband. I have a 5 lb. chihuahua that he has kicked down stairs or across the room. He's also flipped her off the arm of the couch. She has permanent damage to one of her rear legs from his abuse. I also have a husky that was my wedding present from my husband. She's been tortured horribly. He has hit, kicked and pulled her hair. He has stuck his hand down her throats and up her rectum. He has fed her all kinds of things trying to kill her, he's admitted this to us. Most recently, he pretended to take his ADHD medication and walked out of bathroom and fed it to her. This caused her to have a seizure, nearly dying.
He inflicts self injuries and tries to blame everyone else.
He had a 1:1 male aide assigned to him for his IEP. He was so badly behaved the aide quit his job.
He drinks out of toilets, picks through garbage if he sees someone throw away food he wants.
He has been assigned to the school nurses office to use the bathroom because he wiped feces all over the bathroom wall, he then did it at the nurses office as well.
He has flushed banana peels down the school toilet causing the whole system to malfunction and school close down.
He has physically attacked other children and even a pregnant teacher at school.
I've tried to show him nothing but love, however, the more of this stuff happens, I can not stand to be around him.
He's caused rifts in my marriage. He nearly split us up multiple times. He's told my husband he will not stop antagonizing him until he leaves me or dies.
I don't know what to do anymore. Like I've stated we have tried everything every professional has suggested and nothing works.
I've been told we can not put him in foster care voluntarily(we live in NY state).
We have tried residential and been told that the facility we put him in was the only one available in our area for his age.
He has several different diagnosis'. He is on the autism spectrum(highly functioning and very intelligent), ADHD, ODD, cleptomania, bipolar 1. We've even been told he's probably a psychopath but too young to formally diagnose. He's claimed to hear voices and see things, but tells Dr. one day and recants the next.
Anyone have any ideas or similar situations?