Help for 6 yr old son..and us

[alexablue]

We have 2 boys, 4 & 6. My 6 yr old is very very smart, bright and active. He always did everything very early on however we have had behavior issues in school and at times with sitters. In school, gets up out of his seat without persmission, hitting and threatening kids, potty language, repeats everything that he hears from home! With sitters and new people, its almost like he is testing his limits, he will use bad languge, hit his brother very very hard at times, and again repeat family things. He is infatuated with "older" kids and thinks he is on the same level as adults.
He also refuses to sleep in his own bed. During May & June he went back to his bed!!! We were amazed but as soon as school was over, and the new sitter started, the fighting between the boys has gotten worse, and he is back in our bed. Even when we move him to his room, he wakes up and comes back.  He also micmics EVERYTHING he sees and hears on TV or from others. My son loves to try on new personas! We really have to monitor everything that he is exposed to!

In the park, he plays well with others, a few times kids have come over to the sitter and said " he said bad words or he cursed at us". However, we have no problems controlling him, we go out to dinner, the movies, road-plane trips, theater, etc. with no issues. Yes, sometimes he will ask for toys, etc. the normal things but he is controllable.

I am concerned at the amount of anger he displays at this young age and that my younger son is micmicing him.
Last year in Kindergarten his teacher was useless and lacked behavior management skills and the entire class suffered.  

I have taken him to see 3 (THREE) psychologist and they all said that he is fine and just getting bored in school, and regular sibling rivalry.  He participates in activities like ballroom dancing, lego robotics and sports is mostly follows the rules. At times he will go off and do his own things, but I get no complaints.

I wonder if my husband spending more time with him (them) will be the cure as I often see my son seeking out his fathers opionion. My husband was raised by a single mom ( father left the picture when he was 13) and really does not have great parenting skills ( I am sorry to say) He loves them, but I dont know how to make him understand that he has to do more. I really believe that will make a difference. I dont know what else is the problem here.

[binxay]

Okay sometimes, kids have these problems and I've seen it myself when I was younger but all I know is that either something major has to happen in their life to change it, you can try to him but chances are it won't work, he has to have a good enough reason to not act the way he is and he has to choose it himself. Or he'll eventually come to his own conclusions and grow out of it, sometimes kids are just that way at a certain age. Yelling at him is not going to help, you are the adult you need to take control. Sit him down, tell him you love him and ask him about how he acts but do it in a calm way, kids can get overly worked up if they feel like they're in trouble. Tell him it hurts you to see him act this way- I'm sure he'll get the message even if he is only 6.

[alexablue]

No verbal abuse, however, there is yelling because he is pushing us to the limits.

[RockRose]

Twice you mentioned he repeats everything he hears at home.  Is there a lot of verbal abusiveness going on in your home?