Please Help

[doug69]

Hello, im the husband here, my wife 37 and myself 40 are trying to conceive, my wife quit smoking marijuana about three months ago, i do not smoke. Everything was going great and now she thinks it would be no harm to smoke every once in awhile. I know it will be tough enough as it is at our age, and just the fact of that stuff coursing through her system through our child when we conceive! She thinks im just being controlling because ive never liked her pot smoking, its not that ,one i want her healthy regardless and i would love to have a child with the love of my life, please post away and i will have her read this, shes not dumb  or reckless to hurt our chances or child, i think struggling a bit with not smoking, and just needs more answers. Thanks doug  

[nina2249]

Pregnancy. Marijuana. Bad.
Ok, here's some details. Getting pregnant is going to be harder in the first place. Usually, male partners abuse the same substances that their female counterparts do. In men, marijuana decreases testosterone, sperm count, and potency. Needless to say, not a winning combination for conception. Women who smoke marijuana have increased risk of abnormalities in ovulation and therefore more infertility. This risk is enhanced when the use is within one year before attempting conception. This risk did not change with frequency or length of use. So, that means that even occasional use of small amounts of marijuana can decrease women's fertility.

But many women overcome those hurdles. Then, they go on to have higher rates of spontaneous abortion, pregnancy complications, and problems with labor and delivery. Birth defects are associated with marijuana use. Fathers' use lead to higher rates of certain heart abnormalities. Mothers' use is associated with mutant lymphocytes--deranged immune cell factors--which could later lead to higher rates of childhood cancer
But wait--there's more. Their newborns can experience mild withdrawal and some nervous system effects. And the toxic effects of pre-natal marijuana exposure is the gift that keeps on giving. Effects are often not readily apparent in newborns. Still, psychologists who have studied these babies have found neurological delays. Likewise, few negative effects are apparent between the ages of 1 and 3. But a woman shouldn't be fooled if she has heard of a study where the very young kids show no ill effects. Pre-natal marijuana exposure effects what are called "higher cognitive functions" which don't express themselves until later. At four years old, decreases in verbal ability and memory can be found in those kid exposed to pre-natal marijuana use. At ages 5 and 6, more problems with attention span are found. Needless to say, none of this sets the kid up for a great experience in grade school. At ages 9-12, the same problems persist and compound. Pre-natally exposed to marijuana kids have lower impulse control, don't do as well on certain types of analysis and reasoning tasks, and have lower reading and language skills.

So best advice--quit. Ideally, a woman and her partner should quit long before they try for conception. Should a woman find herself pregnant while still using, she should seek out a treatment program immediately. Quitting any substance abused is difficult, but pregnancy is the strongest motivator for women. There are treatment programs geared towards women, and some even geared towards pregnant women.

[PamelaBee]

Hi Doug!  You're a pretty caring guy to seek advice on this forum, I give you alot of credit!  I concur with everything Adgal says.  Any addiction is hard to break.  I think if your wife can just come to the realization that whatever harmful toxins she puts in her body, her developing fetus is gettind a dose of it as well.  Try to imagine an innocent unborn baby, having to breath in pot smoke...or cig smoke or a glass of wine!  Whatever she's ingesting you better believe your little baby is too!  Please try and convince her to speak to a professional, her Doctor is a good person to start with!  They could really help give her some insight as to the potential risk she will be putting your baby in.  Best of luck to you both!!  

[adgal]

There are a couple of reasons she shouldn't smoke pot.  First off, it can actually do damage to the reproductive system, making it more difficult to conceive (google it, true fact)  Secondly, in my opinion its not a good idea to use anything (alchohol or drugs) even while trying to conceive. You are usually at least 2 weeks along before you know its happened.  Is it likely that a little bit of either will harm a developing fetus? Most likely not, but why take the chance.  I have experienced 4 miscarriages (I am 39), and I now even while trying to conceive again, I treat my body as if its pregnant.  No smoking or drinking, I continue to try to eat healthy and have stayed on my pre natal vitamins.  The healthier the mom, the  better the chances of conceiving and the better the chances of carrying a full term healthy baby.  Habits are tough to break  I really struggled with quitting smoking cigarettes when we decided to start trying to conceive, but staying focused on that goal and remembering why I am doing it makes it all worthwhile.

I wish you both luck in tttc and for a healthy pregnancy.