Am I tired from being pregnant or depressed?

[momof3boysplus1]

I just learned 2 weeks ago that I am pregnant (and 42 years old). I have no ambition at all. I nap every day (fortunately I am a teacher and I am not working at the moment). Am I being lazy, am I overwhelmed to the point of depression or is being pregnant at 42 really this difficult?

[cup4sale]

I relate.  I'm 37 and 19wks along. The first trimester I was just so tired and barfed all the time.  I was really looking forward to the second trimester when things should get better  and I could make up for the lack of productivity at work. However, at 19wks, the barfing is less, but I'm still sooo tired.  I go to work and sit at my desk wondering if anyone would notice if I just went to sleep right there or I left early.  I have a history of depression and some days I wake up feeling really down, but if I call in sick and just rest all day the next day I feel much better, so I think it is just being tired from the pregnancy.  Plus, all the things I use to do to either calm down or decompress I can't do or they don't feel good anymore (glass of wine, long run, hot bath etc.).  Even a big bowl of ice-cream can't really be enjoyed, since I know in two weeks there will some disapproving medical professional telling me I've gained too much weight.  My body is getting bigger and even though I know its normal and my husband is awesome, I still have days where I just feel...asexual, which makes me feel kind of lonely and empty.  To top if off, when I start feeling bummed out, I end up reading some article about how being sad during pregnancy can mess up your baby too. No wonder we are feeling down!  This pregnancy gig is just hard, with a lot of self judgement and society judgement ( i.e. if I get a small cup of coffee, which is totally safe, I have to hide while I drink it or I get people looking at me like I'm drinking radiation). Anyone, would be a bit down! I think feeling down sometimes during pregnancy is normal and the last thing us pregnant ladies need is to feel like there is something wrong with us emotionally for not being constantly elated. That is just some stupid expectation invented for a commercial with a smiling, fake pregnant lady (who's body only got big in her belly and no where else) looking eternally excited about spending $900 on a new crib.

[jenstam]

I've struggled with fatigue, depression, moodiness, laziness, being overly emotional with this pregnancy as well. I'm 36 and this is my sixth child. Physically, this has been my easiest pregnancy. Emotionally and mentally, the very hardest. I can relate and I hope you feel better soon. I'm 26 weeks and can't wait to be done for GOOD. Hubby will get a vasectomy after I deliver. Wanted one before but our healthcare provider won't do it until after we deliver!

[41Alone]

I am 41 and surprised to find myself pregnant at this age...my youngest is 17 this year..mixed emotions to say the least.  Cried my eye's out for 2 weeks; watching abortion video's thought I couldnt do it..scared of birth defects; my career; daycare; shots and autism...swirling thoughts. And as luck would see it my boyfriend is 50 years old; his vasectomy is tomorrow..and I already know that I will be raising this baby alone..he works all over the world. I am sure I will be in delivery alone.. I am just a mess...scheduled for ultrasound tomorrow at 2:30pm and he wont be able to make it. I am sure he depressed about this...sending prayers and taking prayers.  

[PamelaBee]

Congratulations...I hope? : )   I was 42 when I had my first child, I was very fatigued, and wondered if I was crazy to be pregnant at my age...but I quickly embraced and overcame all the negative emotions and had an uneventful pregnancy, ending in a perfectly healthy beautiful boy.  No matter what age, pregnancy takes a toll on your body and your emotions, due to the crazy hormones...if you find you are depressed for several days straight or up to a week, please talk to your OB about safe antidepressants to take while pregnant, as it is very common. If you're tired, nap...your body is going through major changes right now, try to ride out the symptoms and emotions, as they will come and go.  I wish you a very happy and healthy 9 months!  Pls keep us posted as you start your OB visits on your progress.  Pam

[40smama]

Like everyone said, tiredness unfortunately is part of the deal - drats!  Try not to stress to much - while it could be a little depression in the mix, chances are you're depressed because you're not feeling up to snuff.  I found once I got through that first trimester, things went more smoothly (I was 44). While age has a little to do w/the energy level, I'm positive that you'll get to feeling better soon.  If you continue to feel unduly sad, talk to your doctor and congrats on your pregnancy! - jen

P.S.  When do you start school?  I used to teach music both in public schools and privately.

[BabyBlue07]

It's normal... your body will tell you when you need to take a nap.. I am 17+ weeks pregnant right now and I am sleepy all the time.. I didn't wake up in the morning until 11 and take nap during the day..

Your body is trying to make baby and you will feel tired all the time.. that's why you need to sleep to gain the energy. Don't feel bad if you are like that.. and especially we are not younger anymore...

Just do what you can and hang in there.. You are just like everyone in this forum.. tired, sleepy, no interest of doing anything, etc....

Good luck...

[steph5692]

Im 35 with my third child and i slept the first 3 months away. Unless i was at work. My fiance did most cooking and cleaning cause i was always sleeping. And i was really moody. Not emotional though. I forsure thought i was having a boy cause i was very mean!!!! LOL its a girl. But i think its normal. Its harder having babys in your 30's. Ive had one in my teens and mid 20's and now. And this one has been the most challeging.  Good luck with you pregnancy..

[SoCalTricia]

I remember being EXHAUSTED the first trimester (I was 40). I mean, to the point of wanted to stay awake, but not being able to hold my eyes open. I'd come home from work and take a nap, wake up to eat dinner, then be back in bed by 8 p.m. It was annoying...but, according to my OB, completely normal. So, don't beat yourself up! Sleep when you feel the urge and stop worrying about it! :-)

Tricia

[youme123]

OMG - I just realized I said probably all of the above, and one of the things you asked is if you are being lazy.  YOU ARE NOT BEING LAZY!  You are pregnant.  Laziness is not in the pregnancy vocabulary.  You have a new life taking every ounce of your nutrition away from you during its most critical developmental time.  It's no wonder you're exhausted.  Oh, I do not want you to think you are lazy.

[youme123]

Probably all of the above.  I'm 37 and pg with my 2nd, and I'm just tired all the time.  I'm 18 1/2 wks, but I slept A LOT in the first trimester.  I also was depressed from hormones (and my mom is really sick and has been).  Do whatever you can to rest when you can and take your vitamins.  Find solace in the things you like that are low-key, and maybe that'll help your mood.  Not knowing your situation, I'm sure this will pass over time or at least get better.  Those of us with depression tendancies have a little tougher time in the first trimester than those without depression tendancies.  when I'm not pregnant, I'm on antidepressants that help me sleep.  When I'm pregnant, I'm left to my own devices, and thankfully, nature helps me out around the 2nd trimester, and I start to feel emotionally better.  Take care, hang in there, and use us on this forum for support.  We will be here!