disappointing first prenatal

[deerhunteress]

This is my first pregnancy.  We only tried once and tada I'm 10 weeks.  I am considered obese but isn't anyone over 150lbs anymore seems like... Anyway I went in and they said I'd have an ultrasound (I had one also at 7 weeks at a private office and they did it on my belly no problem but a girlfriend went with me not my husband) so as soon as we walk in the room she tells me to strip... I ask why she says for a vaginal US.. whatttttt... No one warned me so I shut down and told my husband to get out.. I'm a very private person, so I was totally uncomfortable, he stayed mad at me for the rest of the day and I cried the rest of the day.  (Its both our first) yes I was naked when we made the baby but being naked on a table in a drs office is not the same to me while they shove this rod up in me.  So then I don't see much, and she doesn't say anything just hands me a pee cup and gets my vitals then I see the Dr.. She does a pap and basically is done.. Hands me a packet and says I guess you have tried along time?... Nope... And she walks out.  I am in line to see the receptionist and am looking at my file, no right ovary found, due date Feb 20, complications due to obesity, fetal heart rate 171, WHY DID SHE NOT SAY ANYTHING OF THIS TO  ME? Then they tell me oh go down the hall and have blood work and he back at 13 weeks for GD test. Is it just me or shouldn't she have talked to me more, maybe I just thought things would be different.

[lilpianogirl85]

I agree with what everyone says, change doctors if you can. I had a doctor like this during my second pregnancy and the sad truth is that this is pretty common especially in areas where there aren't many on/guns that deliver so you don't have a choice. IF you cannot change doctors you need to make a list each time you visit of all your concerns and insist the doctor sit down and talk to you. Also ask them what you should expect in your next visit. That way you won't be surprised. Because once you get further along they will be regularly checking you which will require you to at least be naked from the waist down. I'm sorry you are having such a terrible experience especially with your first child. Just be insistent and don't be afraid to put your foot down.  

[Retro_Raven]

Definitely change doctors and there is no point being defensive/annoyed about people commenting on the fact you sent your husband out the room as that is unfair on him and you can't be surprised at people mentioning it when you included it in your initial post- people are offering very helpful and nice advice and I think you should appreciate that.

[Shannir]

I am very obese and 12 weeks. My family Doctor calls my baby a miracle. But she supportI've and got me a high risk obgyn. Never anyone treated me with the disrespect you had.

[solaryellow]

Find a better facility. You are going to want a dr (and team) who will make you feel comfortable! This is a long process and you have many doctor appointments ahead of you. Also, have your husband be a part of this as much as possible. He's probably super excited. You are very lucky to have him by your side. Last thing - I'm also overweight. Started my pregnancy at 5'6 and 250. Granted, I've got a lot of muscle mass but I've also got some fluff! ;) I've never had high blood pressure and I passed my glucose test. Stay positive and find that perfect doctor. It will change your entire experience.

[coachsymons]

Wow, I'm so sorry you had such a bad experience! Yes, a lot of times at the beginning, it will be a vaginal ultrasound BUT she should not have treated you the way she did. How absolutely terrible. At my 20 week anatomy scan, the tech was rude as hell! When the doctor asked me at my next appointment, how it went, I told her. She was appalled and did a scan to check the gender for me and also apologized for the tech's behavior. I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes much better for you!! Congratulations! :)

[sabrinaallen]

Yeah I'd change Dr's fast. And don't worry the naked in front of other people thing will change you get use to it and especially during labor there was a time I started yelling at people to look and tell me if it was time.lol

[patty1848]

Vaginal is done early on in pregnancy for more accuracy.  Nurse shouldn't discuss that with you,  but if your doctor didn't discuss that. .. change doctors.
and yeah, if i were your husband I'd be pissed too. I know you're private person, but so unfair for you to deny his right to see his baby. U owe him an apology imo.

[ajrain8386]

Don't just switch doctors. Switch to a different obgyn clinic all together

[deerhunteress]

I had no clue about the "no right ovary found" I've never had any health issues and always been spot on regular with a normal flow.  She never asked if I'd had problems or anything

[Chefswife]

Change doctors for sure. What a nightmare! Missing right ovary? We're you aware of this? I am 5'8 and when I am 150 I wear a size 6. You have to get used to the being exposed part and allow your husband to be there for the whole experience after all in the end he is going to watch you push a baby out.

[Lizzie_Campos]

Wow! That's all just beyond ridiculous! I'm sorry you had to go through all that and worse being your first time. Switching office is the best thing.  You do not need all that bs. Smh

[cecilia_morgan]

No huny don't just change doctor chance office! It is a violation of privacy fur that tech to not v have left the room and for you to not v have been convered up ! Get out of that office and you make sure you tell that ogfice manager what happened! That is inexcusable! And just changing doctor won't fix the rest of the office or the ultrasound tech. You go online and research offices and doctors and then meet a couple doctors before your choose. If I can't meet ob then I move right along to the next. I met three doctors before I picked one. Be selective! This is a very important thing for your care and the birth of your child.

[aruth]

I would definitely change DR's... None of that is right. The tech should have left to let you change and given you some kind of cover up, and the Dr should have told you more as well, especially about what you read in the chart. I'm not sure why they want to do the gd test so early. I'm high risk and won't have it until later. Maybe call the hospital you want to deliver at and see what other Dr's deliver there and then call them to see if they take your insurance. Sometimes they do but aren't on the insurance website or in the book. Good luck to you...I hope things get better for you soon!

[cecilia_morgan]

Uhm I barely glanced tHrough everyone replies but consensus served to be what I think. CHANGE DOCTORS wtf what a worthless ***** haha. I'm overweight and have never been treated as such! I am 4ft 10 and weigh 168lbs at 19 weeks. Btw being overweight Doesnt mean you will get gestational diabetes. And to test earlier than 28 weeks is pointless as you don't normally get it till then or after so yea. She's just a *****. Sry you had such a, bad experience :-(

[Schmalzy]

Oh wow that really s ucks! I really hope they let you switch!  

[deerhunteress]

No, no history of diabetes. I thought it was odd that I was having the diabetes test so early since Google has became my new friend.  The only thing I have found is that a lot of drs are testing for general diabetes if you have never been tested or diagnosed with any type before.. I'm assuming that's the reason but everyone I have told it to even my FB friends that are prego for the first time weren't tested till 25+ weeks.... So I just called and asked to change to another dr... I have to wait till Monday for the office manager to get back because typically they don't allow switching.  I'm extremely limited on being able to change offices because of my insurance and this is the only one that takes my insurance that uses the hospital I want.  Now I'm worried they will tell her I don't like her and not let me switch, I never thought they wouldn't allow a switch

[Schmalzy]

And I was around the same weight as you when I started my pregnancy and my doctor never told me I'm obese.  I think that's really rude. My doctor just said to gain in between 15 and 25 pounds whole pregnancy. And I don't get the gd test until 28 weeks. I have heard of people getting it done earlier though. . Is there history of diabetes in your family?  

[Schmalzy]

That's very awkward and not right.  She Should have left for you to get changed.  I would be upset too. I Would have told her to leave lol.

[deerhunteress]

It was an US tech that done it but no she just says strip and stands there. I just stood there in shock at first and looked at her waiting for her to leave but she didn't and was like oh and turned around crap even the Dr left for me to "strip" for the pap! and no cover up, I had a cover for the pap but not the US.

[KoriAnn]

Um,  change doctors!

[Schmalzy]

Well in my case I wasn't trying to be mean at all.  And I'm sorry you felt that way.  Your doctor doesn't seem very nice at all.  My doctor left the room and i changed and wrapped a long white napkin thing around myself.  Did your doctor leave when you got changed? Cuz Yes that would have been awkward if she didn't and did you get a napkin to wrap around yourself. . Cuz If you didn't then having that probably would have made you feel more comfortable.  I'm Sorry you went through that and had such a bad experience. I hope you find a better doctor.  

[Amy1830]

I have similar experiences at my dr every time I go. They are always trying to rush thru the visits and don't give alot of information. And if you're a first time mom I'm sure you have alot to know but don't know exactly what to ask! Unfortunately in my case I can't switch drs and I'm almost ready to have my baby, but if you don't like the way they treat you at your next appt I would consider switching. Because childbirth is such an amazing and complicated thing and you want to feel comfortable and happy with these people who are going to be in charge of keeping you and your baby safe. I think it's strange that they told you to get bloodwork for GD already. I guess because you said you're overweight? 150 doesn't sound overweight to me tho. Usually they don't test for that til around 28 weeks. As far them doing the vaginal ultrasound with your husband in there, that wouldn't bother me but everyone feels differently and if you weren't expecting that it was probably weird. On my first visit they did a vaginal exam with my fiancé in the room but there was a sheet over that area. Wanna hear weird tho? The last two times I went to my dr they did vaginal exams and I had my 9 yr old son with me and they didn't ask him to step out of the room! I didn't have a sitter so I figured he would just step out for a minute but they didn't even care! I made him stand behind this little screen they had in there. THAT was awkward lol anyway, congrats on your pregnancy! And how awesome that it only took you one try! It took me 10 months! Lol

[deerhunteress]

This is the first time I have posted on a forum and with some of the replies will be my last.  I was not asking you to judge me on the fact that I am a private person and my personal choice during a vaginal US.  If I had of known ahead of time that's how it would have been done and not just looked at and said strip I probably would have had him in there. I'm not the type of person you just throw something at, I was asking if others had bad first experience or if the drs actions were normal.  I guess I thought this as a support since I don't really have an experienced support group.  

[camerinj]

as a very modest person, I understand that it's awkward, but your husband would have been staying at the screen to see your baby, not looking at the wand in your vagina. I agree that if you want his support you are going to have to find some way to get past those feelings...
as far as the fetal heart rate, that is normal and not at all worrisome at the stage. all of my pregnancies have been like that and by my next appointment are lower.
your doctor should have stayed to discuss this information with you; you have a right to know about your medical situation! change doctors soon, but have a list of questions to ask and shop around so you don't have to go through this again!