Baby tempers?

[Clysta]

I'm not too sure how to really word this, but I'll try. Kylie is now 9 and a half months, and has been acting crazy lately. She says mama, dada and when she's hungry also says nanana. (It only happens when she wants a bottle, so I guess that's what it means?) She also knows who mama and dada is, and will point/crawl to the one she wants while saying it. She seems as well to understand what the word No means, and will have different reactions. Sometimes when she's in the cat food and I tell her no, she'll sit down, push out her bottom lip and cry while crawling to me. Then she'll pull on my pant legs and lay her head on my shoulder. Other times she'll scream and throw her head back and kick her arms and legs. She also has done this when I don't give her something she wants. She'll bite me (or Phil) stick out her tongue, scream at the top of her lungs, flail, hit and throw things and generally just be rotten. If she's given what she wants, it stops. Is this typical 9 month old behavior?

[nola0805]

Yes, it is very typical.  Babies have no way to know that some things they cannot do and some things they cannot have - it does not occur to them at all (and why would it) - so this is naturally a very painful and hard lesson to learn.  She is mad and rightfully so and is expressing her feelings - like the rest of us, how she expresses these feelings changes from moment to moment, but like a baby, some of her reactions are extreme (because she also has to learn eventually that it is not okay to bite when you are mad) - it is hard work being a baby.  In my mind our job is to be gentle leaders to our kids - be firm but kind with rules and limits - What I find works best is a matter of fact "no I'm sorry, but you can't have that or I know you want that, it is so much fun, but it is dangerous."  When she reacts emotionally, let her, and acknowledge her feelings - I know you are sad, mad, etc but do not give in to her.  In this way she learns a healthy way to express her feelings but also learns that these reactions do not work to get her what she wants.  Same goes for the biting, simply state "I won't let you bit me" and put her down for a few moments.  If you yell a loud "no" or give her an big reaction, then this can sometimes encourage the behavior because babies like the big reaction and often do not even process that you are mad.  In fact, many babies will laugh when told no loudly. I know Finn did - and the gentle but firm and consistent approach has worked much better.

She has lots of vim and vigor, which is a wonderful thing.

[MrsPincince]

Girl it's normal. She at the stage where she knows she can get a reaction form you when she reacts...JJ's thing was biting(yes even with his few teeth) and hitting his head on things on purpose when he doesn't get his way... What I learned was to stay firm with when I say "NO" and I used to make my "NO" stern. As for him hitting his head on things, at first I'd run to him and see if he was ok which would give him more balls then he'd either hit his head on me, cry hysterically (no tears mind you) or just completely spaz out..When I stopped running to him and reacting to him going that, it subsided..Kids are kids, and really at 9mos she's just starting to figure you and Phil out..Hang in there:) My mom always said to me "If he didn't cry in the hospital, they would've never let you bring him home. So let him cry, it's good for his lungs"..Best advice she could've given me!!!

[waitn838]

i agree, i think every child goes through this....its just important that you work on stopping it now and quite honestly i think it would be easier to stop now than at 2....my son had these issues at 2 and i seriously thought he was going to hurt himself

he was kicked out of daycare for hitting a teacher that told him not to do something....he would hit his head on the wall any time he didnt get his way and finally one night he was so mad i wouldnt let him do something he threw himself down the stairs....

i found that i had to occupy his mind at all times and even til this day....he's not violent anymore but he needs stimulation or he's in trouble

Em cries when i tell her no but i have learned to let her cry and not console her after she does something wrong....she is into EVERYTHING.....it is crazy.....she is not quite crawling yet but she rolls wherever she wants to go and if it has lights its going in her mouth....everything is going in her mouth.....its so hard keeping up with her some days

[superchoc]

honestly, i couldnt tell you. cleo never hit that until she was 2, a little cousin of mine got to that stage when he was one. i think every child goes through this, most people with no kids call it the 'terrible twos'. i would maybe talk to kylie's health visitor/doctor. its best to nip this behaviour in the bud before it gets out of hand. i hope you get sorted, its frustrating for you, your husband and for your daughter.