I am being unreasonable??

[Val_Schoen]

My husband is planning a trip with his friends to Jamaica. I'm 33 weeks pregnant and he's planning on going when I'll be roughly 35-36 weeks.  All I asked him is to make it 5 days trip rather than a full week. Once he returns he has another getaway with his work for the weekend but at least this second trip is a few hours away.

I'm upset because a couple of his friends including my husband told be I was being unreasonable.  I got mad and told that they wouldn't understand unless they were pregnant. I waddle around, i'm tired, I can lift heavy stuff and don't feel the greatest... you know how it is. I want my support person close by... at driving distance! What if something happened?! Please let me know your opinions.

[LeahBear]

Like others have said, you're not being unreasonable. I think the fact that you are only asking he goes for 5 days is great on your part. My fiance said he wasn't even going fishing (30 minutes away from our home) once I'm 35 weeks. I would also be frustrated because as an uncomfortable pregnant person I'd want a getaway too but that's not going to happen any time soon. Good luck and do your best to stay strong!

[lorinewmum]

I think hes being unreasonable and should be made aware of it without it leading to an argument between you two. Try not to worry too much. What about inviting over some ladies (girlfriends,sister or mum) to stay for the week? You can cook, clean and prep baby clothes and room, really do fun stuff like doing each others hair, nails etc. Hes already made plans and probably wont change them, so you try to have fun at home. Let the girls cook for and pamper you, you deserve it! Also let your partner know that when he gets back, he owes you loads of tlc and pampering! Best of luck with it all, not long to go!

[destinymc7]

I must be a little different. I would be worried about my husband going but I would also support him if I could. Pregnancy is hard not just on the woman, dad's are going through an emotional time but may not verbalize it. Let him know that one day you will get an opportunity like this and he will have to stay alone with baby. I would also set up a plan B about who will take you to the hospital and how much it will cost to get a flight back at a moments notice. You haven't mentioned money so if that's not a factor then he may not be worried about that. Ask him what he is getting out of this trip. If it's just to drink and party then he can do that here if it's to celebrate his last few days with no kid then consider it and if you still say no at least you heard him out. Men don't have the connection with the baby as we do they don't get to feel life inside of them but assure you the moment he sees that little one he will melt. Good luck mama and hopefully you are able to talk it out with him.

[specialmom]

I definitely wouldn't love it.  I get where you are coming from.  I guess I'd have an important question for him . . .   what are his intentions after he is a father?  Running off all the time to party with friends?  That wouldn't fly with me.  My husband does get ONE weekend a year and he goes to a cabin with 3 other dads and they play cards and watch football.  Harmless.  And good for him to get some guy time because he is pretty dedicated the rest of the year.  :>)  

so, I'd start having some talks with him about how he views family life and parenthood and if he is IN or just going to continue to do his own thing.

Now, if he is a good man, I'd let him get his guy time out of his system because babies DO change everything.

It is doubtful if this is your first baby and you aren't having any 'things' that look like you might deliver early----  that his being gone in that tine frame wont affect the birth at all.  and if something does happen, he knows he has to catch a plane straight back.  

but I think I'd be more concerned with the big picture of how he is going to be as a coparent--  thinking of you and the kids or himself once the baby gets here.  good luck

[wyattsmom2015]

Your husband should be the one at the hospital when you deliver. I had to go by ambulance the last baby and it is scary and not fun. I would say no way he would go. You are being reasonable, he on the other hand is not.

[Denise2346]

IM A GUY AND I THINK HES AN AS@ like if he doesn't care what u are going thru... He should be their by you all the way. I mean what if something were to happen while he's on his trip!