Looking for some encouragement...

[eesscott]

My husband suffers from anxiety and panic attacks surrounding health and "medical stuff".  Months ago, I talked to him about how he would handle my labor and delivery. He swore up and down that his anxiety was solely around HIS health and that he is fine around other people's medical issues, so he should have no problem with me.  I must say, I didn't believe him but decided to drop it.

Now, 30 days before my due date, he is having panic attacks several times a week (that I know of) and is basically a mess any time I talk about anything baby or any aches and pains I'm having.   He confessed to me the other night that he's terrified that something will go horribly wrong during delivery.

Thankfully, he did go see his doctor a few days ago and was prescribed two different anxiety meds and a sleeping pill (since he wasn't sleeping either).   But we won't know if the anxiety meds are working for several weeks...

His biggest fear has almost no chance of happening... My biggest fear is that  he'll be unable to function and provide no support for me during labor/delivery... and has a pretty good chance of happening from what I can see.  He still says he'll be ok when the time comes.  

Unfortunately, we've had long discussions about not wanting other people in the delivery room.  For me to suddenly say that I want someone else there... and honestly, I don't want anyone else there. I want my husband.

Sorry for the supper long post, but I guess I'm just looking for some encouragement that I can do it on my own if I have to.  Other than not going to the doctor sooner, it's not his fault and I know he'll try his hardest... but I don't think he'll be able to handle it in his current state.  

[eesscott]

I hope I can convince him to get some therapy.  I brought it up about a month ago but he said it wouldn't be helpful because all they want to do is talk.  Seems to me like that would be the helpful part...  I'm just worried that we've waited too long (plus he'll probably drag his feet even if he does agree to therapy) and that there isn't enough time left for anything to be effective.

[Diamond365]

Definitely have someone on standby just incase your husband can't be the support you need due to his anxiety and before you know it you will be holding your baby in your arms and all his anxietis will most probably melt away in that moment when he lays his eyes on your new baby for the first time. Good luck

[Drixya]

My husband isn't sure he will be ok with labor and delivery. I will have my mother as a backup. I'm just worry because my mother won't be at our prenatal course. I still have hope because my brother is really inconfortable in medical setting and fainted often but he went throught my niece birth without blinking.

[lagurl213]

I know what he is going through. I suffer from panic attacks as well due to military service overseas. It is very difficult to be there for someone when one is not well. In addition to his meds I highly suggest counseling for him alone. Talking about it will work wonders for him to at least be able to be supportive. I would suggest having someone on standby (a friend or family member) that you feel comfortable with. He definitly needs to take his meds more near your due date. My concern is if he will even be able to drive you. When I would go through my panic attacks I barley had energy or the desire to drive. It is really important that you have someone by your side that is supportive and 100%. Im afraid your husband will not be 100% when you are in labor. I know your due date is in 30 days. I hope your insurance covers counseling services like behavioral cognitive therapy. Have him get an appt asap. Let him know to do it for you and the baby. Hang in there and just listen and support him. It is difficult to live a normal life when one suffers from anxiety and panic attacks. He really needs to control this the healthy ways because meds will not help him in the future. He will need both meds and therapy. What will happen if there is an emergency and have to take your child to the doctor? He needs to take care of this for the sake of his family. I wish you guys the best and I hope he gets better. Blessings.

[AnnieBrooke]

The nurses will be a big help.  You can rely on them, especially if you husband needs to be carried out on a gurney.  Set up one friend to stand by in case that happens, and then just go in with your husband.