I've been doing this for years, in and out of the hospital, and I just can't do it anymore... I've absolutely had enough. I have no energy to fight it anymore, I'm tired of them coming to get me and putting me there and trying useless attempts to stabelize me. And now the hospitalizations are getting closer together, which means life outside inbetween just *****. I may sound like a quitter but actually if you knew me, I've lasted quite a long time here thru an enormous amount of pain, pain that just never stops, and in fact just keeps getting worse. I really don't understand what I've done to be punished so badly here, but I can't take it anymore...