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Avatar universal

Well...

A few months ago my mother went out of town, and I had been swimming with a friend. That night I was eating popcorn and had a chest pain, and my mind went immediatly to heart attack. Of course, I knew that I wasn't having one I'm 16 in perfect health. So panic attacks started from then on. Finally my mother came home and I guess I kept thinking what if they don't stop. So she took me to a minor emergancy room to prove nothing was wrong, they took blood and I was perfectly fine. So it's started getting better, then I had the follow up with the doctor, who prescribes meds wayyy to quickly and put me on a Antidepressent very low dose, but I read the side effects which everyone knows says if under the age of 18 you are more likely to get suicidal thought/attempts. And a few days later I read a story that was suppose to be a love story and the chick killed herself at the  end. Now I have never been suicidal before, and then all of a sudden I'm sitting in front of a book going " O my god what if I become suicidal". Well that continued for awhile, my mother took me to a therapist, and they took me off the meds because they thought that could be it. I've been off them for a few weeks now and I still can't help but think What if I do it....I mean when I'm with friends I'm fine most of the time. I know my family would be upset. But I'll get up in the morning and be fine and somebody on TV will say something like "Goodbye" or "Write a letter" ( they said something about people who are suicidal write letters, and I haven't but it's just a thing that goes through my mind.) I mean I don't want to be condisered suicidal but this seems like a whole lot of thinking for someone who's not. I'll go through things like If you hang yourself you'll look really silly. or If your sister finds you she'll never get over it. But things like that just scare me more ya know? I mean someone said the word gun yesterday and I go if you had one would you shoot yourself? I mean it was perfectly innocent mentioning, and I don't really can't even see myself killing myself but I can't get it out of my head can anyone help?
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Avatar universal
A fast heart rate can be due to anxiety (amongst other things).

When you are anemic or iron deficient you can get chest pain.  I have been iron deficient and have had chest pain and anxiety as symptoms.

Medication can help with the symptoms but make sure you follow it up with a good amount of therapy.  Therapy can help the underlying cause which can help eliminate the problem altogether.  Medication usually only masks the problem.

Your therapist sounds as though she is on to it.  As you're fit, young and healthy you should bounce back relatively quickly.  I hope that is the case anyway.

Sometimes it's a good idea to look around on the other forums, etc and get additional advice and support.  I liked the old doctor on the mental health expert forum, he often gave very good advice.  Looking through the archives on that forum may be helpful.
Sometimes just forgetting everything and focusing on your life and what your therapist is asking you to do can sometimes be helpful.  Just do what you feel is best for you.

Good luck with everything.
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Avatar universal
Well, they said that it could have been a spout of anemia due to feminine issues. But the blood test came out fine other than my really fast heart beat.

And we know it started out as anxiety, and yeah, I can admit that it's still some anxiety my therapist just recently came up with the obsessive thoughts idea, and we're going to try the medication for it.

Also thanks for the advice on the forums. It's much appreciated.
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Avatar universal
I was just thinking about your chest pain.  Could that have been due to swimming, do you think?

Most antidepressants now have black boxes (warn about suicide risk, especially in younger populations).

Some of your thinking seems to have become a little distorted (like your mind makes it out to be worse than it is).  You could almost look at it like swimming with really scratched goggles.  The picture, or perception, you get with and without the scratched goggles will be different although the picture is actually the same -just how you see it is different.

It sounds as though you are more anxious than depressed.  Medication for anxiety would likely work better.

Keep talking with your therapist and ask for help if you feel things are getting out of control or are overwhelming you.

There are also expert forums if you want to ask one of them a question about what is going on, etc.  The mental health -international expert forum would probably be a good one to try.  There is also an anxiety community forum and an obsessive compulsive behaviors community forum (I think).
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Avatar universal
Oh yeah I've talked about it and she's thinking about getting me on a new meds. that deals with obsessional thinking.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Have you spoken to your therapist about your thoughts and feelings?
I'm wondering if it's an obsession or obsessional thinking.  ??

I've lost my train of thought but it would be good to discuss these thoughts with your T.
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