Loads of mental problems.

[bloodknife92]

Ok, where do i start?
I've been in love with a beautiful girl whom of which i've known for a while now, a few years, but she lives in New Zealand, and i live in Australia. i have absolutely no way to go and see her because im irresponsible when it comes to saving money(i just blew what i had saved on something that just isnt worth it) so i cant fly over there, and i couldnt fly her over here because her dad just wouldnt let me, which is understandable. we had a relationship, it lasted... a month? we were never happy during such period, always arguing and she was always hurting BECAUSE i wasnt there with her, i was hurting too, but nothing like what she felt. About a month before our relationship was when we fell in love, and then was when i began feeling the burning desire to be with her. a lot of the time in which i have loved her, i have had quite a few moments in which i want to give up, not off myself, just cause serious damage. some days i want to jump in front of a car or bus, others... I've recently heard that some anti-biotics can, well, yeah... and we happen to have a lot of anti-biotics in the cupboards in the bathroom. about a week after we finally broke up, we started drifting apart. at the moment i think she just sees me as a friend, probly a close one, i dont know, im quite dumb when it comes to reading and understanding people more than 1000 kms away(i do want to be a psychologist should i live past 20). today i looked up amnesia, and how i could atain such an issue. I was(not that i'd attempt to get it) wondering of any safe ways to get amnesia. I just... i want to forget everything, i want to forget her, and i want to forget anything happened between us... as heartless as it sounds, its something im considering, more so than serious damage.

[butterpecanr]

dude pray pray pray.ask jesus to rebuke any negativ thoughts that you have. he will fix
it

[drifter0213]

speak to a doctor before you hurt yourself :)