incest is there a cure?

[spiritsoulmates]

a man that used to work for me, moved to Alaska, I have not heard or seen from him in over 3 years approximately, I did not know his wife real well, evidently they had 3 children together, a six-year-old boy, a 9-year-old girl, 11-year-old boy, I know her brother, the wife's brother real well, who is a good man, called me one night and asked if I had a trailer place for his sister and her children, it seems the father the gentleman that used to work for me, was molesting the daughter from the time she was 6 years old until she was 9 years old, the only reason the mother found out about it, was the 11-year-old boy was playing with himself, and the girl caught him his sister, and she said, “I do that to daddy all the time”. The mother then confronted the father, and he did not know how to react, he talked to his pastor about the situation, and the pastor recommended that he turned himself in to the authorities. When he did this, he was faced with 12 felony charges, his mother has a lot of money and hired the best attorney available, and he will do less than one year in prison in Alaska. His parole conditions are that he remained in Alaska for 12 years. The mother is going through or his wife, the 5 stages of death,  denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and finally acceptance. My brothers and I were left 23 acre RV trailer park in a small town with 32 rentals, I provided her with the trailer, the cost of 6 to 8000 who have refurbished, and gave it to her, had an old car  of hers fixed $1000, and I do not charge her any rant, I pay for everything, TV telephone I gave her a computer everything and anything she needs, she has a full-time job working as a bartender in a fairly upscale bar, she is 39 years old, she just went to Alaska with her father to get the remainder of her things that she wanted, my question is, and I have mentioned it to her it would break my heart if she went back with him. She said no way, and she also stated that the children could not see their father until they were 18 years of age. At 1st, after reading a couple of books on this subject, I rejected her staying here, because from what I understand, 95% or better of the wives know about this abuse. But she did take the children and move from Alaska to the Bay Area California. And that meant something to me, when I told her she could not stay here, her brother said her an her would be up here in a minute, I drilled her with every question I could think of, and she stated that I sounded like the authorities that question her. So I felt comfortable and letting her stay here. As a professional, I would like your thoughts on this situation. I have been clean and sober from drugs and alcohol for over 9 years, and very active in the program of alcoholics anonymous. I feel it is a similar disease, but I'm not sure, what I feel is that he should be sent home for judgment. I feel the only cure for this man if there is one, is that he starter program called  incest anonymous, and help others who have the same problem he has. And devoted his life to God and service in that program. My fear is that she will go back with them. Your opinion is greatly appreciated, thank you very much,

[overopiates]

         So u wanna put a bunch of pedophiles together to talk about the children they molest to each other as Well as talking about there urges to do so???Im sure a lot of molesters would enjoy the meetings because they could secretly get there twisted rocks off listening to each other.This is about as good and safe to do as getting convicted rapists together regularly.These r indiviuals who cause a lot of harm alone god forbid they team up .

[Jaquta]

It is natural to go through those stages of grieving.  People do it in their own time and in their own way.

I believe the mother was sincere in not knowing of the abuse as she sought help immediately on having concerns.

I don't believe that an incest anonymous program is appropriate.  This is child abuse and illegal.  I think that people who abuse others should be given the necessary treatment to help them recover and stop offending.  Many continue to do so once released from prison.  You may like to raise your concerns on the abuse community forum here at medhelp.  I'm sure others will have opinions they may be more willing to share.

I think the wife was sufficiently disgusted by her husbands actions.  I think that what she chooses to do with her life is her concern.  I doubt that she would take her children back into that environment and put them at risk.

Everybody has a story.  The wife, the husband, the children.  Sometimes it's difficult to offer any decent opinion without knowing all the history.  the children should be the priority and should be in therapy.

As the mother is working I wouldn't be supporting her 100%.  I think that she should be in a position to start taking some responsibility back.

If you have concerns then approach the wife or her brother who you have a good relationship with.