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I need a mental diagnostic for this.

     Everything seemed to fall apart when we moved to Texas in 2012, I was 12. There was an incident that would've tooken my mothers life had she not been strong enough. (I knew something bad was going on, why didn't I wake up and do something?) I heard what sounded like muffled screaming coming from the other room. Awakened from my dreams, I sat in bed with my eyes closed. It all happened so fast, momma came in the room bloody and woke me and my 2 younger brothers up to leave the area. The man that attacked my mother and tried to take her life was on the loose. He was no stranger, he was my mothers boyfriend at the time up until the incident and seemed like he was a promising role-model. He got aggressive after an argument they had over their relationship. He was trying to (And thank GOD, was unsuccessful) crush her wind pipe and leave us , kids, to find the outcome of something unexplainably horrifying.He got to her neck and started squeezing with no intention of letting go, they fell to the floor and she grabbed the iron from under the ironing board, swinging it back and forth he let up and was playing the victim because blood was involved. My mother told us what she said and did it for, us. "You will not take me away from my babies". All I can see 'til this day, is my momma, bloody with his blood, and shaking from a near death experience; what I didn't do and waht I could've done; how would I have moved on with my life had hers been tooken.
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973741 tn?1342342773
Sweetie, what could you have done at 12.  You were a baby still.  That is all severely traumatic.  It would be understandable to have many different reactions to that and have it affect you your whole life.  Post traumatic Stress syndrome is real an diagnosable and best, treatable. Yes, seek the help of a professional to determine how best to help you.  Therapy is highly recommended to work through this as well.  Let me know what you think of this sweetie.  
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