Paranoid or is this incest?

[Tucker4275]

I've recently started seeing a man who lives with his 18 yr old daughter. They seem more like a married couple than anything else and it's begun to concern me.  Especially when the other night after making love he & I got on the topic of 3soms and he said he'd had one once at the house. For some reason I asked where his daughter was at the time and he said, with a straight face, "she was there too". When my eyes widened and I said "what?!" he paused a bit too long then smiled and said she was gone, out. But there was something about the way he said it that made me believe he was telling me the encounter was with her (and one of her friends?)... That he'd been testing my reaction. Especially since in the past he has answered things in much the same way only to act like it was a joke; but more often than not I find his "joke" answers are the truth - he always admits them later.
He & his daughter are very very close. She acts like his wife. Always calling to see when he'll be home.  It makes me uncomfortable although she doesn't seem to have any problem with our relationship. It's strange. Lately I wonder if I imagine it all or if they are sexual or have been in the past. Something about the way they interact screams "relationship" - although they are careful not to be too physical around me.
What signs of incest should I be looking for? Is there anything telltail that will confirm my assumptions?  Why would anyone mention their daughter when talking about who a sexual encounter was with? Isn't this odd? I don't want to find problems where there are none but don't want to be in this if it is what I fear. I'm afraid I already love him so even putting this out there is hard & seems like a betrayal. I just don't know if I should trust my instincts or not. Maybe I am paranoid??  Any advice is appreciated.

[wuttaday]

Hi. I'm a little bit new here. But.... I do agree with that we can CHOOSE, not be dictated to... whom we love. More power to ya, Tinker! Also, I just want to say that I do LOVE & ADORE you & I built character, not just good looks... many years ago.... I just hope someone appreciates it. And I do live in So.FL. But I love the ocean & the lifestyle. I just hope I meet someone who loves my character! I have been building my character for over 30 years. I have been told I am also good looking. BONUS! But..... when I don't have the physical good looks, I hope I have built enough character to meet the man whom I deserve!!!!!  

[hperske]

She said the man lives with his 18 yr old daughter,  not that the man is 18.

[Kayannaboo]

OK first and foremost RUN....fast! The 3sum thing should be more than enough for you. You do not want to get entangled in something like that, whether or not you have suspicions about incest or no.

The fact that his daughter acts like his wife is really not a big deal if it is ONLY based on the fact that she worries about his whereabouts etc. I am like that with my parents, both of them. I ask who, what, where and why. Its nothing except I am close with them. It all depends FOR ME on the type of relationship we all have and the kind of boundaries your parents set. My mom is an open book and my dad is all up in my grill and doesn't mind that I do the same to him so I ask questions whenever I wish.

However, the fact that he tells you his daughter was right there and his reaction and your reaction RAISES THE REDDEST FLAG THERE IS. NO ONE in their right mind would joke about their kids like that or even think about it. You will end up in some serious trouble if you continue with this man.

Anna

[allmymarbles]

I was once in a similar situation. I was young at the time and didn't quite understand what was going on, except that I knew something was odd. I spoke to an older man I knew and he explained things. Then, when I was older and more sophisticated, I ran across the same situation again. This time I did not need an explanation.

Your instincts should be your guide. You feel something kinky is going on. Assume it is.

[specialmom]

Well, why would you want to continue dating someone that you believe was testing the water to see what your reaction was to him having a threesome with his daughter and a friend???

Even if you just suspect he was trying to tell you that, it's weird.

This seems like a no brainer.  Move on and find a better guy.

[lynnePerucca]

I would go with my GUT instincts. Any father who would "joke" about a threesome with his daughter is sick. Also please remember (or understand) pedo's DO NOT distinguish their OWN bio children from others. RUN!