mental abuse?????

[Joy_faith_hope]

so ive been with my boyfriend for 3 yrs now n I am now currently pregnant since I got pregnant he treats me diffrent and not in a goos way he acts controlling and tells me im fat and tells me he can be with any girl he wants then he tells me hes just playing what the hell! I think he just wants me to have low self esteem so he can jave power over me what do you think?

[DentureRepair]

I agree with ally and read above suggestions, but i really don't know if he is treating like you such a bad manner, why are you living with him, If you are pregnant it doesn't mean that you are dependent on himself. Be strong and self dependent, remember nobody can help yours, but you can. others only suggest you.

[Lusie0515]

Abuse is 50% more common when the woman is pregnant than when she is not pregnant.  For some reason the man feels that the woman is paying more attention to her baby and her body.  He feels he needs more attention so he treats you poorly..

I'm a  Labor and Delivery RN and see this often..  :(

Make sure you have a good support system around you.. and find a safehouse you can go to if you feel threatned..

[lucky7480]

I so understand and relate to you and when I read someone say you create your self esteem. That is partially true but when you love someone and all you hear is how disappointing you are to him and I mean all the time. After awhile with a broken heart you start believing it. I don't care what people say about me but when my husband. Says he can get better ect.. It stings. You want your man to think and say your beautiful. It's a mans job to protect you and really I don't my husband loves me and it's only been three years. This is why today I am reaching out because I love myself and want to be loved and feel like I am all he sees.

[margypops]

See I think you have to protect your children and if he is verbally abusive to them it will affect them all their lives ..So although you can take it you have to think of the children .Many women feel they can change their man , but more often than not they cant do that and life becomes very uncomfortable, you will walk on egg shells .Will he seek some help in therapy ?

[Loopyleesa]

I'm in exactly the same boat. But my partner has autistic spectrum and is rather challenging. We already have to daughters and im 6 months pregnant. So tough at times. I know exactly what your saying. Me and our daughters can't do right from wrong. I get the courage to leave then he comes running back and turns it to make me the bad party. I'm in limbo. I love him but I hate him and how he treats all of us.
If its whilst you been pregnant give it a little time and talk to him, might bring you closer together at the end. Some things work out but you have to give it time.

[allmymarbles]

Abuse is a two-way street. The abuser seeks someone who can be abused. If, early on, you stand up for yourself, this can break the cycle. She is having his baby. Trying to save the union is worthwhile, but she has to assert herself.

[cheshchesh819]

Tell him to go look for someone else who will put up with his crap,tell him you may be putting on weight,but once his child is born you will get back to your original size,where as he will always be a controlling self centred pig.

[bassboy]

I was married to a woman that treated me the exact same way, always belittling me & putting me down and saying "its a joke"  well you have to stand up for yourself. Never fear someone you love, if you do, you should probably give the relationship a break. I ended up divorcing after finding out that I was being treated like crap due to her pill addiction. I tried to get her help for 2 years but with 5 children in my home, it was time for a separation ending in divorce. Hope my advice & story inspires you to be independent & happy.
Its your life so take control, plus the job thing sounds like a perfect way to get more respect from your partner.

[Joy_faith_hope]

Thats very true and I dont work right now because my pregnancy is a lil complicated and my doctor suggested that I dont work but I  have a barber stylist licence and I will work as soon as possible thanks for your comments :)

[allmymarbles]

He thinks that because you are pregnant you are now dependent on him, won't run off, and he can do with you as he likes. Do you have a job? If not, get one. that would show financial independence. Bullies back off when a woman is independent.

[Kayannaboo]

Agree with Ally, self esteem is something that has to do with SELF. Let him know his 'jokes' are not funny and that they hurt your feelings. If he doesn't stop then its up to you to decide if you can deal with him or not.





xoxoxoxo Anna

[allmymarbles]

No one can give you low self esteem. That is something you develop all by yourself. To know if you have low self esteem, if you put up with his behavior, you do, and if you don't, you don't.