Adderall Use

[hopelesskid]

I began taking adderall for studying my freshman year at college.  Then I got a pretty nice prescription for them in October 2008 but did not take nearly as much as I was prescribed.  But now I have built up quite a dependency on them.  Before I would take 20mg XR a day early in the morning to study alll day then 30 now 40mg XR which is also beginning to lose its effects.  I am currently an undergraduate and will be taking the MCAT on September 4th.  I need to study a lot so I have turned to none other all mighty adderall.  During school, I would take it only on weekends or days when I am writing a big paper, or before an exam.  It really did help me out a lot and I don't know if I could have done as good as I did with out it.  

But now, I am studying everyday, all day.  So I use it every day, all day.  40mg XR first thing in the morning.  Then I study.  But lately its been doing a lot of damage on me.  Much more than before probably because I am taking so much more now without any breaks.  I feel really depressed, angry, muscles twitch, i get nervous, confused, anxious, blurry vision, heavy eyes, jaw pain (from grinding I guess), dry mouth and the list goes on and vary every time.  

I talked to my friends about it and they just says "so stop talking them!!!."  Of course I don't need to tell you how easy that sounds.  If I don't take them, I get no studying done.  My mind just keeps wondering off, I have zero motivation or desire.  I am under intense pressure to do really good on the MCATs or else I don't get into medical school.  I know, so what, I can try again, do some thing else blah blah blah.  But believe me when I say this, I can't.  So the only viable option I see for me is to keep taking them for the next two months, every day.  

  

[J T Junig, MD PhD]

First you need to realize that you already ARE like the other people on this forum.  People with addictions all see themselves as unique, but the illness is the same in everyone.

You won't die from amphetamine withdrawal.  You CAN die, incidentally, from amphetamine intoxication-- very suddenly.  The term is 'sudden death'-- it comes from an arrhythmia induced by the high adrenergic state.  If you get V fib, you know, I'm sure, what your odds of survival are going to be-- unless you are standing right next to the defibrillator unit in the local mall.  But by the time it is put on you, you will likely lose way too much brain to be a doctor.  I say this in case you need more reasons to stop what you are doing.

Send me an e-mail through my home page at fdlpsychiatry.com if you want, with 'adderall' in the subject line.  I get too many e-mails, but I will watch for it, and see what we can do.  The general choices will be to hole up somewhere for a couple weeks and get your brain back to normal (it will come back but it takes several weeks), vs a taper of a long-acting stimulant,l like vyvanse.  You may, of course, have a deeper addiction than you realize, with psychological cravings too great for you to overcome.  If that is the case, residential treatment is often indicated

Your name and e-mail are safe with me;  I would not (and could not) turn you in to a licensing board.  That would not be my role, or my right.

[Ella789]

I hope someone comes along soon who knows how to help you.   It sure does sound like you are building up a "tolorance" .  After awhile you need a little more and a little more.  Bummer,  
I understand that you need to study but you also need to get a handle on what's happening to you.   Please, search and read all you can about adderal.  What it is doing to your body and your mind.  Sleep is precious, and restful sleep is what helps heal you.  I know abt. tolerance with opiates but not much abt. adderal.  It would be great if you could wean yourself down,  don't know if you can possibly do that.  I'm sorry this is happening to you, I understand as I have two children in college and grades are crucial to them too.

Hope the Dr. here can offer some help.

Ella

[hopelesskid]

Just to finish what I was saying earlier (I went over the word limit):

But I really hate their side effects and REALLY don't want to end up like other users on here.  

I know, the solution I am looking for does not exists.  So I don't really know what to do.  Cant live with them, cant live without them.  Same old love-hate relationship that several other users experience.

If you can suggest something or whatever the would help, I would appreciate it.