hello. sometimes the best thing to do is the hardest. there seems to be little doubt as to the existence of a problem, but the solution may require actions that are difficult. the fact of the matter is, your partner is on a suicide mission as long as he continues to drink if he's anything like i was when i began having 'life' problems (negative effects on work, finances, relationships). one of the worst things about addiction is the effects it has on those close to the afflicted person. it's usually the ones that love us that we hurt the most. as addicts (for me alcohol is no different from any other drug), we take others hostage by manipulation and making them feel guilty for not giving in to our pleas. once the line has been crossed, the drug becomes our motivation, our master, and our higher power. threats of suicide should be taken seriously, and referred to the proper authorities (i don't know about the uk, but in the us, suicidal people can be involuntarily committed for evaluation--as happened to me). as long as others made it easy for me to do what i wanted, i continued to self destruct, and almost succeeded. i would highly recommend contacting alcoholics anonymous and/or al-anon (both aa and al-anon have uk websites and meetings in your area) and share your situation with them. there you will find people who have been through the same problems (from both perspectives) and will be glad to help you both. there is a way out. take care---gm
as usual boogie is dispensing very sound been there advice!u would benefit urself to follow thru with his suggestions!