Aa
alternatives to AA
I am an atheist and a nonsmoker. Everything I've read about AA indicates higher powers and lots of smoke. The thought of "higher powers" and smoke-filled rooms turns me completely off. I don't believe in higher powers and refuse to subject my lungs to cigarette smoke. What are some of the other rehab alternatives? I have finally accepted the fact that I am a "problem drinker" and need to do something about it. My maternal grandmother was an alcoholic. My maternal aunt died from alcoholism. My mother has periodically had over-drinking problems. As have I. I quit drinking for 4 months last winter and ended up drinking more when I quit quitting. I need some kind of support for quitting that doesn't involve religion or high cost (I have Blue Shield).
I'm at that crossroad of trying to decide if I'm stuck with no alcohol forever or whether I can relearn to drink sensibly. I suspect I'm stuck quitting. Alcoholism seems to strike later in life in my family. Grandma was at least in her 40's, as was mom, and me when I started drinking too much. Aunt started in her thirties.
I'm at that crossroad of trying to decide if I'm stuck with no alcohol forever or whether I can relearn to drink sensibly. I suspect I'm stuck quitting. Alcoholism seems to strike later in life in my family. Grandma was at least in her 40's, as was mom, and me when I started drinking too much. Aunt started in her thirties.
Tthere are lots of alternatives to AA. You can not go, relapse, go, never fully surrender and be more miserable than you were when you were drinking or you could choose to not take the suggestions and suffer thourgh being DRY not SOBER. Oh and you can close yourself off to someone in your future that you just might be able to help.
Take what you want and leave the rest. Act as if and pray to whomever or whatever for the WILLINGNESS to believe. We can't all be wrong.
I have faith in you. Don't quit 5 minutes before the miracle happens.
Take what you want and leave the rest. Act as if and pray to whomever or whatever for the WILLINGNESS to believe. We can't all be wrong.
I have faith in you. Don't quit 5 minutes before the miracle happens.
I;m in NYC and I know of NO MEETING in this state or Jersey or a lot others where they are allowed to smoke.
It never bothers you if you're in a bar now does it?
It never bothers you if you're in a bar now does it?
quote; " I don't believe in higher powers". well my friend i can tell you now the higher power is you "your electrical soul or whatever you want to call it. don't forget it's your consciousness that is going through the rough road of no hope or the way off the drink. you have the power to change it in an instant, anything in your life you need changed. it can be done but it takes a strong consciousness to tell the brain it needs a change.
Just for the heck of it I google up "nonsmoking AA meetings" I got 45,700 results.
What state do you live? Chances are there are a few in your state.
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=nonsmoking+AA+meetings&btnG=Google+Search
What state do you live? Chances are there are a few in your state.
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=nonsmoking+AA+meetings&btnG=Google+Search
That seems to be the sad fact of many people who don't take it seriously. It is an illness and will only get worse...not like it will heal itself...
Imagine having cancer and refusing chemo... chances are one won't live long....at least the chemo gives a chance but this time there does seem to be a way, that can halt the progression of the disease with even more certaintly.
I write stories and a few of my characters struggle with a similar issue. Some choose to live. Others just ignore their chances and end up with the inevetable...tis life. (even if in my case it's fiction.)
Imagine having cancer and refusing chemo... chances are one won't live long....at least the chemo gives a chance but this time there does seem to be a way, that can halt the progression of the disease with even more certaintly.
I write stories and a few of my characters struggle with a similar issue. Some choose to live. Others just ignore their chances and end up with the inevetable...tis life. (even if in my case it's fiction.)
I suggest that you go out and do your own research. Don't assume anything. If you ask 100 people how to recover, you'll get almost 100 opinions! Bottom line - - experience it for yourself. Getting sober is difficult at best so go out and see what feels best for you...go with an open mind and humility.
If you are serious about your alcoholism and want to stop drinking, you'll cultivate some open-mindedness. Yes, you might want to check out what has been mentioned, the non-12 step modalities. However, I would urge you to CHECK OUT AA FOR YOURSELF.
In this day and age (at least in the US), most meetings are non-smoking (very few facilities where meetings can be held permit any smoking) and it is well-known by 12-steppers that you don't have to be religious to get and stay sober - and many atheists happily go to AA. It's free. There are a huge amount of meetings every day and night of the week (especially in more populated areas) that suit every sort of human diversity. Look online for a meeting list in your area - they're all listed. And no one specific person "runs" AA - everything is done by concensus. So each person has the opportunity to vote on the particulars of your meetings. Obviously, I favor AA for many reasons (I have seen many recover through 12 step programs) - - it would be much too difficult to elaborate here - Addictions are a complex issue - - you would be better off to go and see for yourself. Only your own personal experience will determine your personal outcome.
There are many types of meetings and every meeting has it's own personality - - so try a few different ones. There are women-only meetings and men-only meetings (suitable and safe for real open sharing), general open meetings where anyone can attend (non-alcoholics), and closed meetings just for people that have a desire to stop drinking (no visitors), gay and lesbian, many ethnic meetings, and even for people of different interests/circumstances (for example, doctors, actors, joggers/runners, mothers with kids, etc, etc).
Don't assume! See for yourself. Check all the modalities out while being honest with yourself. Your health and well-being are at risk - even your life.
Good luck.
If you are serious about your alcoholism and want to stop drinking, you'll cultivate some open-mindedness. Yes, you might want to check out what has been mentioned, the non-12 step modalities. However, I would urge you to CHECK OUT AA FOR YOURSELF.
In this day and age (at least in the US), most meetings are non-smoking (very few facilities where meetings can be held permit any smoking) and it is well-known by 12-steppers that you don't have to be religious to get and stay sober - and many atheists happily go to AA. It's free. There are a huge amount of meetings every day and night of the week (especially in more populated areas) that suit every sort of human diversity. Look online for a meeting list in your area - they're all listed. And no one specific person "runs" AA - everything is done by concensus. So each person has the opportunity to vote on the particulars of your meetings. Obviously, I favor AA for many reasons (I have seen many recover through 12 step programs) - - it would be much too difficult to elaborate here - Addictions are a complex issue - - you would be better off to go and see for yourself. Only your own personal experience will determine your personal outcome.
There are many types of meetings and every meeting has it's own personality - - so try a few different ones. There are women-only meetings and men-only meetings (suitable and safe for real open sharing), general open meetings where anyone can attend (non-alcoholics), and closed meetings just for people that have a desire to stop drinking (no visitors), gay and lesbian, many ethnic meetings, and even for people of different interests/circumstances (for example, doctors, actors, joggers/runners, mothers with kids, etc, etc).
Don't assume! See for yourself. Check all the modalities out while being honest with yourself. Your health and well-being are at risk - even your life.
Good luck.
You have my sympathies.
In my area, there is one meeting only designated for smokers, all of the others are non-smoking. It may be the same where you are.
Although there will be many that do so, claiming an anthropomorphic superbeing is not a requirement of AA. A sense of purely secular group consciousness works for many people. Fellowship - the company of others - is also a possibility. In addition, there are wholly materialistic techniques taught
at the meetings that many have found helpful.
In any case, since AA must appeal to a broad group of people you will probably not find a group that is not at least occasionally boring or repetitive
or irrelevant to you, but there may be enough there for someone who is truly
motivated to stop drinking - someone whose life is being ruined and/or is miserable - to find useful.
Good luck to you. Try a number of meetings before you reject it out of hand.
Bob
In my area, there is one meeting only designated for smokers, all of the others are non-smoking. It may be the same where you are.
Although there will be many that do so, claiming an anthropomorphic superbeing is not a requirement of AA. A sense of purely secular group consciousness works for many people. Fellowship - the company of others - is also a possibility. In addition, there are wholly materialistic techniques taught
at the meetings that many have found helpful.
In any case, since AA must appeal to a broad group of people you will probably not find a group that is not at least occasionally boring or repetitive
or irrelevant to you, but there may be enough there for someone who is truly
motivated to stop drinking - someone whose life is being ruined and/or is miserable - to find useful.
Good luck to you. Try a number of meetings before you reject it out of hand.
Bob
Heyh.. you dont like God and you hate smoke. So what? It isn't all about you, what you think and want. You are not the center of the universe. Shut up and go to an AA meeting (there are smokeless meetings around). I have felt the same as you and know what you're dealing with. Alcoholism is easy to hold back, the ways to do it are known and there are no excuses. Only wimps cannot stop drinking, wimps that cannot bow their own miserable will to the will of God. So, just get there and sit down at the AA meeting, that's all you have to do, you don't have to like higher power.
RationalRecovery.org check it out. No God Stuff - No spirituality Stuff.
But, hey - don't lie to yourself - you are not a staunch nonsmoker if you smoke pot, dear!
It ruins your lungs, too! I could be wrong on that assumption but I just read a whole bunch of posts that looked like you were on the marijuana maintenance program.
And most AA meetings are nonsmoking these days due to all the tobacco-smoke free laws that are in place. I don't know what state you are in (and don't want to know) but here in the Georgia/Alabama area you can't smoke in ANY of the meetings!
And there ARE people in AA/NA/CA that don't smoke cigarettes. I know many of them.
And stop trying so hard to disprove there is a higher power. AA is not a place that you have to "defend" anything. You DO however have to learn some tolerance and most of the old timers will love you until you can love yourself and will tolerate you until you learn to tolerate others.
Hope all Goes Well
But, hey - don't lie to yourself - you are not a staunch nonsmoker if you smoke pot, dear!
It ruins your lungs, too! I could be wrong on that assumption but I just read a whole bunch of posts that looked like you were on the marijuana maintenance program.
And most AA meetings are nonsmoking these days due to all the tobacco-smoke free laws that are in place. I don't know what state you are in (and don't want to know) but here in the Georgia/Alabama area you can't smoke in ANY of the meetings!
And there ARE people in AA/NA/CA that don't smoke cigarettes. I know many of them.
And stop trying so hard to disprove there is a higher power. AA is not a place that you have to "defend" anything. You DO however have to learn some tolerance and most of the old timers will love you until you can love yourself and will tolerate you until you learn to tolerate others.
Hope all Goes Well
COMMUNITY LEADER
bless u girl for working/loving the elderly!takes a special person!my mom is 90 and has Lewy Body Dementia.in assisted living for alzheimers folks.i go c her b-weekly and i always tell the good staff ppl who care 4 her how much i appreciate them!she is in a very good facility....always glitches but we're on top of them and work it out!
amen to everything you said...
i work with the elderly and it is so wonderful, yet heartbreaking, because the average time span i have with them ranges 2-3 years...
you learn to help them, laugh with them, cry with them, cry as they leave this world but know that your life is so much more enriched by having been touched by theirs...
alot of hurting people are out there in this world, but i'm going to take it one person at a time...
cyberhug 2u
i work with the elderly and it is so wonderful, yet heartbreaking, because the average time span i have with them ranges 2-3 years...
you learn to help them, laugh with them, cry with them, cry as they leave this world but know that your life is so much more enriched by having been touched by theirs...
alot of hurting people are out there in this world, but i'm going to take it one person at a time...
cyberhug 2u
COMMUNITY LEADER
The Unitarians are helpful ppl......whether it b AA church RR SOS..there r many roads to recovery!i am substance abuse counselor dayjob...sober/clean 24 years....coming up on 25 and i will c 25!i honor whatever healthy sober/clean paths my folks take to make necessary changes in their lives!ah u lil gals can pack it away!woman oh woman.....i am 5'8 and thinner back in the drunken day and could float away just like u 2!such a better life this sober/clean one!Cyberhugs 2 u both!
i was an alcoholic by the age of 18...
i drank gin straight from the bottle as soon as i woke up straight through the day until the night when i would just pass out, then do the whole thing over again the next day, and the next...
finally, oneday in a drunken stupor, i staggered to my dresser, and looked myself in the mirror, with pains in my liver so bad that i knew that this was it, either i stop the drinking and live, or continue and die...
i chose to live...
you can do this...
i was only 5"1 and weighed 108lbs...
it won't be easy, life just isn't like that, but you can do it...
i can be around people who drink, and it doesn't bother me at all, because i laid that down along time ago, and never looked back...
good luck...
i drank gin straight from the bottle as soon as i woke up straight through the day until the night when i would just pass out, then do the whole thing over again the next day, and the next...
finally, oneday in a drunken stupor, i staggered to my dresser, and looked myself in the mirror, with pains in my liver so bad that i knew that this was it, either i stop the drinking and live, or continue and die...
i chose to live...
you can do this...
i was only 5"1 and weighed 108lbs...
it won't be easy, life just isn't like that, but you can do it...
i can be around people who drink, and it doesn't bother me at all, because i laid that down along time ago, and never looked back...
good luck...
Thanks folks. I'm going to look into the local organizations and see if I can find a reasonable fit. I'm not good around a lot of people, and I'm more comfortable around women than men (I almost married a closet alcoholic and I simply don't trust alcoholic men, sorry). I'm thinking the local Unitarian Fellowship might be able to help me too.
My history: went through a two week drinking binge when I was 19. Quit alcohol the first time then until I was maybe 24. Then many years of occasional drinking, mostly wine. As I approached my 40's my amount crept up. In my mid 40's I started being able to finish a bottle of wine by myself, occasionally got completely smashed on tequila and had a couple of blackouts. I quit wine and all hard alcohol, and switched to beer. Started slow, with one beer. Stayed on a strict 2 beer limit for a couple of years (I'm one of those people who counts drinks at parties and bars) and then edged up to three. This last winter I decided that I was drinking too much so I quit for about 3 months. When I started again, I started at 3 beers, and now drink 3 beers every day with many days it being 4 beers. So here I am. That is too much for a 5'2" woman to consume every day. I'm definitely losing control and can no longer CHOOSE to drink one, two, or three beers.
The good part is that I never drink and drive, nor do I get into a car with somebody who has been drinking.
My history: went through a two week drinking binge when I was 19. Quit alcohol the first time then until I was maybe 24. Then many years of occasional drinking, mostly wine. As I approached my 40's my amount crept up. In my mid 40's I started being able to finish a bottle of wine by myself, occasionally got completely smashed on tequila and had a couple of blackouts. I quit wine and all hard alcohol, and switched to beer. Started slow, with one beer. Stayed on a strict 2 beer limit for a couple of years (I'm one of those people who counts drinks at parties and bars) and then edged up to three. This last winter I decided that I was drinking too much so I quit for about 3 months. When I started again, I started at 3 beers, and now drink 3 beers every day with many days it being 4 beers. So here I am. That is too much for a 5'2" woman to consume every day. I'm definitely losing control and can no longer CHOOSE to drink one, two, or three beers.
The good part is that I never drink and drive, nor do I get into a car with somebody who has been drinking.
that is great what you are going to do...
if you want to take this story i have shared with all who read it, and share it with your group go right ahead...
i wrestled my demons and won, and anyone, anyone, who truly wants to, can...
it all comes down to choices, not excuses, choices...
the world is full of choices, and i've made mine...
i am taking the tragidies from my life and trying to share them with others so that it may help someone, anyone, maybe just one person even... then, it's worth it...
mama says she is an atheist, well this is where i state my case, i am a christian, just trying to help people...
you go girl!!!
if you want to take this story i have shared with all who read it, and share it with your group go right ahead...
i wrestled my demons and won, and anyone, anyone, who truly wants to, can...
it all comes down to choices, not excuses, choices...
the world is full of choices, and i've made mine...
i am taking the tragidies from my life and trying to share them with others so that it may help someone, anyone, maybe just one person even... then, it's worth it...
mama says she is an atheist, well this is where i state my case, i am a christian, just trying to help people...
you go girl!!!
COMMUNITY LEADER
to mama-I went to AA/NA,Rational Recovery and Secular Orgs for Sobriety..i took the best from all of them....and if u want sobriety bad enuf u will do the same....sobriety requires that we alcoholics/addicts look deep in2 the depths of our flawed souls and take responsibility for our dirt and do our best on a daily basis not 2 repeat it.Many balk at doing this...oh yes What an order!I can't go thru with it...u can if u WANT 2! Katrina-I am damn lucky...so grateful that i never hurt anyone with the irresponsible drunk driving i did.....i could never live with myself if i did......23 was 2 young at the hands of drunken fool...so tragic and senseless!I bought the movie Clean and Sober 1988 with Michael Keaton who won an American film Critics Award for his role as Daryl Poynter.....awesome portrayal of a defiant drunk/addict who comes to grips with his demons.....gonna show it to my Adult Recovery Group 2 morrow......they have never seen it....for they are in their 20's and 30's.....it is a awesome poignant movie!
how very true what you said...
after all was said and done, the boyfriend finally moved out of state because he could not live with the guilt... but you can't run from yourself, you just take it with you...
i was my sister's oldest sister, i helped pick out the coffin, the grave stone, ect...
she died, i had a nervous breakdown, dad could barely keep it together, his baby was dead...
this wasn't just a story on the local news, in the newspaper, it was real, it was life, it happened...
nothing is worth that junk about just one more drink, i wrestled with that demon, but pulled myself together, threw out the bottles, and walked away never looking back...
thanks for careing...
after all was said and done, the boyfriend finally moved out of state because he could not live with the guilt... but you can't run from yourself, you just take it with you...
i was my sister's oldest sister, i helped pick out the coffin, the grave stone, ect...
she died, i had a nervous breakdown, dad could barely keep it together, his baby was dead...
this wasn't just a story on the local news, in the newspaper, it was real, it was life, it happened...
nothing is worth that junk about just one more drink, i wrestled with that demon, but pulled myself together, threw out the bottles, and walked away never looking back...
thanks for careing...
hello. i was reminded of a popular comic strip a few years back in which an alcoholic was struggling with the things he didn't like about meetings such as smoking and unfamiliar ideologies. his friend's response was "if the building you're in was on fire, you wouldn't complain about the rust on the fire escape".
not to make light of any of this, but when i saw that it made a lot of sense. i guess it all comes down to how badly we want to stay sober, without reservations. if i could still get wasted and cause no apparent harm to myself and others, i'd most likely still be playing around with it.
also to reiterate, i can't speak other locations, but here in the "tobacco capital" of the u.s. (n. carolina), it's hard to find smoking meetings anymore. and aa is not a religious program. it draws from principles found in most religions such as self-appraisal, honesty and unselfishness but does not require anyone to adhere to any dogmatic religious beliefs.
finally, another quick true story.
a local man, who was well known in the community as a problem drinker, frequently got arrested for being drunk and disorderly. as his consumption of booze progressed, he found himself in the county jail more often after offending other people. most of these incidents he would be unable to recall after sobering up. it was no big deal as he would simply be allowed to "sleep it off" in a cell and be released the next morning.
one morning, after awakening from one of these escapades, he called out to the deputy to let him out so he could go home. the officer walked up to the cell and with some reservation replied.
"you're not going anywhere. you killed someone last night". it was then that the man realized his life would never be the same, because of something he did in a blackout.
that could have been me, and still can be if i choose to disregard the fact that i can't safely ingest alcohol or any other fast acting psychotropic drugs.
best wishes to you all, gm
not to make light of any of this, but when i saw that it made a lot of sense. i guess it all comes down to how badly we want to stay sober, without reservations. if i could still get wasted and cause no apparent harm to myself and others, i'd most likely still be playing around with it.
also to reiterate, i can't speak other locations, but here in the "tobacco capital" of the u.s. (n. carolina), it's hard to find smoking meetings anymore. and aa is not a religious program. it draws from principles found in most religions such as self-appraisal, honesty and unselfishness but does not require anyone to adhere to any dogmatic religious beliefs.
finally, another quick true story.
a local man, who was well known in the community as a problem drinker, frequently got arrested for being drunk and disorderly. as his consumption of booze progressed, he found himself in the county jail more often after offending other people. most of these incidents he would be unable to recall after sobering up. it was no big deal as he would simply be allowed to "sleep it off" in a cell and be released the next morning.
one morning, after awakening from one of these escapades, he called out to the deputy to let him out so he could go home. the officer walked up to the cell and with some reservation replied.
"you're not going anywhere. you killed someone last night". it was then that the man realized his life would never be the same, because of something he did in a blackout.
that could have been me, and still can be if i choose to disregard the fact that i can't safely ingest alcohol or any other fast acting psychotropic drugs.
best wishes to you all, gm
COMMUNITY LEADER
Cyberhug 2 u dear!sigh!many times the alcoholic will read this and think...hmmmph..that will never be me!or i can control it!i am so sorry for ur families loss!
I HAVE A TRUE STORY TO TELL YOU, AND AFTER YOU READ THIS, IF THIS DOESN'T MAKE YOU REALLY WANT TO QUIT, I DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL...
IT WAS OCTOBER 1998, MY 23 YEAR OLD SISTER AND HER BOYFRIEND WENT TO A WINE TASTING PARTY...
HER BOYFRIEND WAS AN ALCOHOLIC, WHO JUST HAPPENED TO WORK FOR A LIQUOR COMPANY, NICE COMBINATION...
HE LOVED FAST CARS AND ALCOHOL...
THEY LEFT THE PARTY, STOPPED AT A FRIEND'S HOUSE, DRANK A BOTTLE OF WINE, AND HIT THE ROAD, HEADING HOME...
HER BOYFRIEND HAD A FAST MUSTANG, IT WAS A CLEAR FALL NIGHT...
MY SISTER THOUGHT AS LONG AS SHE WAS IN THE CAR, HE WOULD STAY IN CONTROL, BUT HE DIDN'T...
THEY ARE ON A COUNTRY ROAD, AND HE IS SPEEDING HEADING FOR THE CREST OF A HILL BEHIND ANOTHER CAR...
HE DECIDES TO PASS THE CAR IN FRONT, SPEEDING UP AT AN INCREDIBLE RATE OF SPEED...
AT THE CREST OF THE HILL, WHAT HE DOESN'T KNOW IS THAT THERE IS A HIDDEN DRIVEWAY JUST OVER THE HILL, AND THE CAR TO THAT HOUSE HAS NOW PULLED OUT INTO HIS LANE...
WHEN HE HITS THE CREST OF THE HILL, HE REALIZES HE HAS NOWHERE TO GO, TRIES TO SLOW DOWN, BUT NOW HE LOSES CONTROL OF THE CAR...
IT LEAVES THE ROAD GOING ABOUT 100MPH, HITS A DITCH, THEN THE CAR IS THROWN INTO THE AIR AND BEGINS ROLLING OVER AND OVER, UNTIL IT WRAPS ITSELP AROUND A TREE, ON MY SISTER'S SIDE OF THE CAR...
WHERE SHE WAS SITTING, THERE IS NOW NO SEAT, JUST THE TREE, AND SHE IS JAMMED UNDERNEATH THE DASHBOARD, CRUSHED TOTALLY FROM THE WAIST DOWN, WITH MASSIVE HEAD INJURIES...
HER BOYFRIEND CRAWLS OUT THE BACK WINDOW OF THE CAR, AND IS IN CRITICAL CONDITION...
OVER FIFTY VOLUNTEERS, PARAMEDCIS, DOCTORS, AMBULANCES AND A HELICOPTER ARE NOW ON THE SCENE...
MY SISTER'S RIGHT LEG IS ALMOST TOTALLY SEVERED AT THE KNEE, AND THE REST OF HER LEG SO INTWINED WITH METAL, THAT AFTER TWO AND ONE HALF HOURS, THE DOCTORS CUT HER LEG OFF AT THE HIP AND SHE GOES INTO A COMA...
WHILE THEY ARE AT THE SCENE, SHE IS LOSING BLOOD SO FAST, THAT THEY CAN'T KEEP REPLACING IT FAST ENOUGH...
THE HELICOPTER RUSHES HER TO A HOSPITAL, SHE DIES A HALF HOUR LATER...
HER BOYFRIEND LIVES AND RECOVERS...
OUR FAMILY HAS NEVER BEEN THE SAME SINCE THAT NIGHT...
HERE'S MY POINT, YOU HAVE A CHOICE TO GET ALCOHOL UNDER CONTROL AND LIVE, OR DRINK AND MAYBE END UP LIKE MY SISTER...
SHE WAS BEAUTIFUL, JUST STARTING OUT IN LIFE, EVERYTHING GOING FOR HER...
PLEASE, PLEASE, MAKE THE RIGHT CHOICE...
SHE DIDN'T...
I HAVEN'T BEEN TO HER GRAVE SINCE WE BURIED HER, IT'S JUST TOO PAINFUL..
I KEEP HER ALIVE IN MY HEART AND MY MEMORIES...
IF THIS STORY CAN HELP YOU OR ANYONE ELSE, IT'S WORTH THE TEARS STREAMING DOWN MY FACE...
IT WAS OCTOBER 1998, MY 23 YEAR OLD SISTER AND HER BOYFRIEND WENT TO A WINE TASTING PARTY...
HER BOYFRIEND WAS AN ALCOHOLIC, WHO JUST HAPPENED TO WORK FOR A LIQUOR COMPANY, NICE COMBINATION...
HE LOVED FAST CARS AND ALCOHOL...
THEY LEFT THE PARTY, STOPPED AT A FRIEND'S HOUSE, DRANK A BOTTLE OF WINE, AND HIT THE ROAD, HEADING HOME...
HER BOYFRIEND HAD A FAST MUSTANG, IT WAS A CLEAR FALL NIGHT...
MY SISTER THOUGHT AS LONG AS SHE WAS IN THE CAR, HE WOULD STAY IN CONTROL, BUT HE DIDN'T...
THEY ARE ON A COUNTRY ROAD, AND HE IS SPEEDING HEADING FOR THE CREST OF A HILL BEHIND ANOTHER CAR...
HE DECIDES TO PASS THE CAR IN FRONT, SPEEDING UP AT AN INCREDIBLE RATE OF SPEED...
AT THE CREST OF THE HILL, WHAT HE DOESN'T KNOW IS THAT THERE IS A HIDDEN DRIVEWAY JUST OVER THE HILL, AND THE CAR TO THAT HOUSE HAS NOW PULLED OUT INTO HIS LANE...
WHEN HE HITS THE CREST OF THE HILL, HE REALIZES HE HAS NOWHERE TO GO, TRIES TO SLOW DOWN, BUT NOW HE LOSES CONTROL OF THE CAR...
IT LEAVES THE ROAD GOING ABOUT 100MPH, HITS A DITCH, THEN THE CAR IS THROWN INTO THE AIR AND BEGINS ROLLING OVER AND OVER, UNTIL IT WRAPS ITSELP AROUND A TREE, ON MY SISTER'S SIDE OF THE CAR...
WHERE SHE WAS SITTING, THERE IS NOW NO SEAT, JUST THE TREE, AND SHE IS JAMMED UNDERNEATH THE DASHBOARD, CRUSHED TOTALLY FROM THE WAIST DOWN, WITH MASSIVE HEAD INJURIES...
HER BOYFRIEND CRAWLS OUT THE BACK WINDOW OF THE CAR, AND IS IN CRITICAL CONDITION...
OVER FIFTY VOLUNTEERS, PARAMEDCIS, DOCTORS, AMBULANCES AND A HELICOPTER ARE NOW ON THE SCENE...
MY SISTER'S RIGHT LEG IS ALMOST TOTALLY SEVERED AT THE KNEE, AND THE REST OF HER LEG SO INTWINED WITH METAL, THAT AFTER TWO AND ONE HALF HOURS, THE DOCTORS CUT HER LEG OFF AT THE HIP AND SHE GOES INTO A COMA...
WHILE THEY ARE AT THE SCENE, SHE IS LOSING BLOOD SO FAST, THAT THEY CAN'T KEEP REPLACING IT FAST ENOUGH...
THE HELICOPTER RUSHES HER TO A HOSPITAL, SHE DIES A HALF HOUR LATER...
HER BOYFRIEND LIVES AND RECOVERS...
OUR FAMILY HAS NEVER BEEN THE SAME SINCE THAT NIGHT...
HERE'S MY POINT, YOU HAVE A CHOICE TO GET ALCOHOL UNDER CONTROL AND LIVE, OR DRINK AND MAYBE END UP LIKE MY SISTER...
SHE WAS BEAUTIFUL, JUST STARTING OUT IN LIFE, EVERYTHING GOING FOR HER...
PLEASE, PLEASE, MAKE THE RIGHT CHOICE...
SHE DIDN'T...
I HAVEN'T BEEN TO HER GRAVE SINCE WE BURIED HER, IT'S JUST TOO PAINFUL..
I KEEP HER ALIVE IN MY HEART AND MY MEMORIES...
IF THIS STORY CAN HELP YOU OR ANYONE ELSE, IT'S WORTH THE TEARS STREAMING DOWN MY FACE...
It's sounds like you might be at the stage where you "want to want to quit" rather than at the stage where you will go to any lengths to stop drinking. AA by no means "preaches" religion, and there are many "no smoking" groups or meetings, so if you're ready to stop drinking, then don't let being non-religious and a non-smoker stop you. In fact, if you'll just go to AA, I think you'll find that you were looking for reasons not to stop drinking -- that's what we all experienced at one time. I wish you the best and hope you will begin the process of getting sober and staying sober...whatever it takes. The perfect setting to getting sober isn't likely to be out there. Your worst day in sober will be far better than your best day drinking, if you'll just pick yourself up and get to a meeting......
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