Anxiety and going out with friends

[4sophie]

I have a history o f anxiety/ p anic attacks. Finally made a decision to return to work . First two days very hard, but the third was a lot better. I today I'm off and cancel going out with my friend. Do I need to push myself to go out with friends? Will it ever get easier. Had a panic attack because I was afraid to go out. Any suggestion.

[sunset555]

Hi there! the only way possible is to basically KEEP on going if that makes sense hun? as like you Ive also suffered over the years and the only thing that kept me personally going was the old saying, "If the going gets tough, the tough gets going! etc/// and whilst Iknow how hard it is, it DOES get easier, in my experience and still to this day is the actual "ANTICIPATION" for that is the killer for us all believer it or not and once you get over this hurdle and being out in the company of your people, it DOES get easier, in fact a hell of a lot easer! try it in future ok? and let me know how you get on.. Sunset xx

[nursegirl6572]

Yes but he said I'm stuck. That I need to make decisions and take action.

I definitely can understand that and agree with it, to an extent.

If you've been exhibiting avoidant behavior due to anxiety for a while, significantly (usually called "agoraphobia"), then it's usually best to set smaller goals and work your way up.

When you say "out with your friends", what kind of outing are you talking about?  Bar hopping/clubbing/drinking, or something else?  If the first, I wouldn't personally advise that. Something about that atmosphere, even if YOU are not drinking, that induces anxiety in a lot of people...dark, crowded, etc.

Start with dinner, movies, shopping, etc.

[MattyTaylor]

Have you told your friends about your anxiety issues? You would be surprised how comforting they could be. Let them know about your anxiety and when you are out with them, if you get to feeling bad and have to return home, they will understand why. Start out slow like nursegirl said, maybe invite them over to your place for a night of movies? Something easy that can help you build up to bigger things.

[4sophie]

Yes but he said I'm stuck. That I need to make decisions and take action.
I want to go out with my friends but I get scared and never go

[nursegirl6572]

Pushing yourself to do things you are avoiding because of anxiety IS important, to an extent.  I wouldn't recommend pushing yourself to do things that may exacerbate your anxiety (like partying/drinking), and I also would recommend knowing your limits.  Meaning, if certain environments cause you great anxiety, like a concert...you may not be quite up to that kind of challenge just yet.  IN that case, it's best to start out slow, and work your way up to more anxiety-producing events.

What are you doing to address the anxiety?  Are you in therapy?