Aa
Guilt
Hi -
I made two mistakes in my life, had protected intercourse with two prostitutes. I am completely overwhelmed with guilt and can't get over it. It will never happen again. I keep thinking, what if i got a disease what would my life be like. It's borderline depression inside but not outside. How have some of you dealt with these types of situations ? Thanks in advance for your help
I made two mistakes in my life, had protected intercourse with two prostitutes. I am completely overwhelmed with guilt and can't get over it. It will never happen again. I keep thinking, what if i got a disease what would my life be like. It's borderline depression inside but not outside. How have some of you dealt with these types of situations ? Thanks in advance for your help
And since you ARE a NORMAL person who actually cares about "stuff," you probably never WILL totally get over the guilt. But you WILL eventually find a small box in your heart or your head to keep it in...........the same box that holds all the floatsom & jetsom of our lives we prefer to keep tucked away.
And it is because you are an intelligent person that you find your mistake unacceptable..........but with that intelligence, you must accept that your mistake was utterly human. You aren't above making human mistakes, are you? You're not, like, Superman, are you?
And the point julie made should not have come as such a revelation to you.........men, (and women) have been going to sex workers for a very long time, back to Biblical times if I'm not mistaken (which I NEVER am! LOL) Did you honestly think YOU were the only one engaging in this pass-time?
And just FYI, I don't consider what you did as a "sin." We may hold vastly different religious or moral views, but I see it as pretty normal human behaviour and like julie said, you really must stop being so hard on yourself.
Stuff it in that box!
Peace
Greenlydia
And it is because you are an intelligent person that you find your mistake unacceptable..........but with that intelligence, you must accept that your mistake was utterly human. You aren't above making human mistakes, are you? You're not, like, Superman, are you?
And the point julie made should not have come as such a revelation to you.........men, (and women) have been going to sex workers for a very long time, back to Biblical times if I'm not mistaken (which I NEVER am! LOL) Did you honestly think YOU were the only one engaging in this pass-time?
And just FYI, I don't consider what you did as a "sin." We may hold vastly different religious or moral views, but I see it as pretty normal human behaviour and like julie said, you really must stop being so hard on yourself.
Stuff it in that box!
Peace
Greenlydia
Well Honestly- This posting has helped alot. I can't say that all the guilt is gone and I'm back to being a normal person. I'm disappointed in myself. I like to think of myself as an very intelligent person and for me to make a mistake like that is unacceptable. I constantly think of all the people on the phone that are depenedent on me. Well, I learned my lesson. It did help hearing a womens point of view, especially julie who pointed out that i'm not the only one committing this type of sin. Thanks again all for your help and advice
Yeah, greenlydia has given you some very good advice. Wow, if only i had made two big mistakes... not that i am undermining yours, not at all but i think in my 35 yrs on this planet i have made more than i dare to share.
And just to state that having intercourse with a prostitute isn't the ultimate sin. Millions of guys world wide have done this for numerous reasons. I feel you are being far too hard upon yourself... as greenlydia said you have told urself you will not do this again so treat this as your lesson learn't and now forgive yourself and move on.
We are only human, we make mistakes and if we learn from them then all the better.
And just to state that having intercourse with a prostitute isn't the ultimate sin. Millions of guys world wide have done this for numerous reasons. I feel you are being far too hard upon yourself... as greenlydia said you have told urself you will not do this again so treat this as your lesson learn't and now forgive yourself and move on.
We are only human, we make mistakes and if we learn from them then all the better.
So has your guilt lifted by making your original post? Or is it just a case that you will live with it? Just curious. We always like feedback about answers other members made and if it helped or hindered a situation.
Hi - I appreciate the words of wisdom. I think this is the last time I'll ever be discussing this. Thank You!
If you've only made two mistakes in your life, I hardly know what to say! You should be in some sort of world record book.
I don't have any real sage wisdom for how you, personally, can deal with the guilt you feel. As with so many things in life, we must all find our own paths to self-forgiveness. You made, what was for you, apparently a very large mistake. But you learned a very large lesson from it. Rather than dwell on your guilt, be grateful for the knowledge. You said yourself you will never do it again. So take the lesson to heart and let the rest of it go. Hanging onto the guilt is totally counter productive. Forgive yourself and move on.
As to all the "what if's" you're driving yourself crazy with..........let them go as well. What if you did? What if you took off the hair shirt you're making yourself wear? What if you simply accepted that you're human and you made a very human mistake? Do you think you're the only one who has done that?
You had protected sex and therefor are at zero risk for HIV.
If you're going to continue with all the "what if's," then go get yourself tested.
You ask how some of us deal with these types of situations..............the best way most of us have found to deal with any kind of "situation" is HEAD ON.
Getting yourself tested will answer your question about HIV. How you are going to deal with your guilt is entirely up to you. In my humble opinion, guilt over what you did is a complete waste of time. You feel you screwed up, you regret it, you've vowed it will never happen again, you learned a big lesson about yourself............tell yourself you're sorry and you accept your apology and get on with your life.
If you can't seem to do this, then I recommend therapy as there are issues far deeper than you've told us about.
Peace
Greenlydia
I don't have any real sage wisdom for how you, personally, can deal with the guilt you feel. As with so many things in life, we must all find our own paths to self-forgiveness. You made, what was for you, apparently a very large mistake. But you learned a very large lesson from it. Rather than dwell on your guilt, be grateful for the knowledge. You said yourself you will never do it again. So take the lesson to heart and let the rest of it go. Hanging onto the guilt is totally counter productive. Forgive yourself and move on.
As to all the "what if's" you're driving yourself crazy with..........let them go as well. What if you did? What if you took off the hair shirt you're making yourself wear? What if you simply accepted that you're human and you made a very human mistake? Do you think you're the only one who has done that?
You had protected sex and therefor are at zero risk for HIV.
If you're going to continue with all the "what if's," then go get yourself tested.
You ask how some of us deal with these types of situations..............the best way most of us have found to deal with any kind of "situation" is HEAD ON.
Getting yourself tested will answer your question about HIV. How you are going to deal with your guilt is entirely up to you. In my humble opinion, guilt over what you did is a complete waste of time. You feel you screwed up, you regret it, you've vowed it will never happen again, you learned a big lesson about yourself............tell yourself you're sorry and you accept your apology and get on with your life.
If you can't seem to do this, then I recommend therapy as there are issues far deeper than you've told us about.
Peace
Greenlydia
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