Anxiety or Phobia or Obsession? All of them?

[mr_hope]

I have had an issue for the last 2 years since I had one encounter of handjob in massage parlour. After reading a lot on net, I was almost dumped that time and after getting 6 months test, I came back to my routine...

Now I'm always have the thinking of HIV and whatever I'm doing its getting onto my mind. Like I know there is no chance of HIV, but any encounter take me to that extent where I cant think else...how I can overcome it? pls guide

[Paxiled]

You're developing a phobia, an anxiety problem.  If you can't beat it and it's interfering with your life, therapy is the way to start in trying to get over it.  If it's not interfering that much with your life, you work on learning the facts and you work on living your life until your brain learns not to obsess over this.  But when we can't do this ourselves, that's what a good therapist can help with.  It's like any other phobia, like fear of flying -- you have to learn how to not let the irrational take over from the rational.  It can be hard and takes work, but hopefully you can work on it and get over it.  

[mr_hope]

i just recently have an encounter that is according to experts is zero risk but my mind is still occupying me and im planning to not visit my family untill again 3 months to wait for conclusive result of hiv.I know its not a risk but im getting it on my mind all the time.so do u think i should visit a therapist???it should be a psychologist?kindly guid to whome i should consult

[AnxiousNoMore]

You said that you can't accept the experts advice. Therefore, it is likely that you won't accept the test result either. If that happens you will have lived 3 months in agony and not solved your problem. The therapist is your best solution so it is good that you plan to go.
Have you stopped googling on the internet? Unless you stop, the therapist won't be able to help.

[mr_hope]

Dear i searched a lot and plus my roomates here have issue of sore throat amd fever from last 4 5 days and now im developing same symptoms of headache,fever,pain in eyes.i got answers including you and all said its not an issue plus even the ars sumptoms cannot come in 2 to 3 days...i booked ticket for my home country in 20 days now pls guide me how i should tackle it whether i should visit a therapist or else i should go to home country and engage with my wife to kill this fear.
for your info,
i just handjob the transgender with no seen fluid ofany kind and no visible cut on my hand plus he also rubbed my penis from cloth on..thats it

pls advise i ll do accordingly

[mr_hope]

one thing to add he didnt came or no precum i saw to my knowledge..what if precum or semen was there??

pls its my last question so answer me in detail

[Paxiled]

As far as your HIV risk, you've already learned the answer to that and we're only focusing on your anxiety here.  Yes, a psychologist who specializes in the treatment of anxiety.  And any help you can get from friends and family can't hurt, but the good thing about a professional is if they're good at it they will know tools to teach you to help you relax when you're obsessing.  I'm getting the feeling, though, that perhaps now that you mention your wife and the kind of sex you're engaging in that maybe there's some guilt in there?  Maybe a lot of guilt?  And maybe that's the true source of your obsessing over this?  Just asking.

[mr_hope]

yes true my worry is i should not give him anything that she doesnt know...im planning to reschedule my tour to have atleast on yest at 28 days like ab/ag for my comfort plus visit to therapist to cover it...

[specialmom]

Work on anxiety as that is the key to your problem. Health anxiety is real and plagues many and clearly you are amongst them.  Basically, you begin to be irrational in your thinking and over think and picture doom and gloom and it has nothing to do with your base fear (HIV) but rather all to do with your mental health.  You need to talk to a therapist about your mental health as that is the ticket to overcoming this.  Otherwise, no test will ever reassure you because your anxiety keeps you locked in on being irrational with your thinking.  Go to a doctor for anxiety, it's your best chance for feeling better.