Contraceptive pill is making me crazy/anxious?!

[helpme1294]

I am 30, i was on Cilest for 10 years and then switched to Micrgynon. I literally feel like I have gone crazy and beyond the point of return. I have NO reason to be depressed or anxious, i have a wonderful husband and have an amazing house. But I worry constantly to the point of feeling exhausted alot of the time and hazy. My worry all stems around my husband, i am obsessed with his past and constantly worry he will leave me/cheat/fancy other women. I have felt like this for over 2 years now but I am really embarrassed about how I think so can't tell anyone (except you guys)! My husband has been great and so patient but has come to his wits end which is making me even more anxious. I dont know what to do. I think about just disappearing all the time. I hope its my pill, but i'm almost scared to stop taking it incase I found out it's just me. I feel insane. I feel i have no happiness left within my soul. I ALWAYS feel like I am the only person in the world who thinks this way. Do you think it could be the pill?? Please let me know if anyone feels the same. x

[helpme1294]

Just to update you I contacted a surgery and have booked myself in for CBT which they think will help. I hope it will although I am skeptical about it. I feel my thoughts are so strong nothing can alter them!

However, trying to think positive!

x

[nursegirl6572]

It really sounds like you could have either OCD or an anxiety disorder (in my humble non official opinion).  While the BCP may have contributed to your anxiety, or initially triggered it, I would bet you're kind of stuck with some anxiety at this point. That doesn't mean you can't get better, because you can.

IMO, First,  I would ask your doc about your options with the pill.  Could you maybe try to come off it completely?  Choose condoms or something else for BC and wean off the BCP to see if that makes a difference?  I think that's a logical starting place.  

I actually got pregnant with my daughter (1st child) while being on the pill religiously since age 15 (not missing any, no antibiotics, etc..I was truly one of the flukes), but anyway, I've NEVER gone back on an oral contraceptive since, I just didn't trust it.  We have used condoms all of these years, and while condoms aren't as fun, it's doable.  Just an example for you.

I would also recommend seeing a mental health professional for a thorough eval, either way, no matter what you do with the BCP.  You need to see what's going on and then develop a plan with the doc to address it.  Like I said, regardless of the role the pill played in this, it's definitely something that needs addressed at this point.  I would just HIGHLY doubt that these anxiety issues would go away 100% after discontinuing the pill.  They may improve a bit, but I would GUESS you have developed some chronic anxiety issues at this point.  JUST my unofficial opinion.

Let us know how you're doing and what you decide, okay?  Hang in there!!

[helpme1294]

Hi,

Thanks for your reply.

Growing up I was a happy child teenager. I went on the pill at 16 and was fine for many years. I started to notice a mild depression/anxiety in my mid 20's which coincided with a few other issues - my complexion became bad. I therefore put it down to my pill and went to my doctors who suggested Yasmin. I tried this for a month or two but felt really emotional so changed back to Cilest but it never felt right again. I felt really anxious all the time. It coincided with a bad relationship which I ultimately ended. I then came off the pill completely and this is when I met my now husband. After about 3 months I went back on to Cilest but I immediately started having intrusive thoughts, obsessions ALL about him. I don't worry about anything else. At first it was around the end of my pill packet but it was gradually spanning over more and more time. I therefore changed my pill to microgynon but it has continued.

I have had things happen in my life that may have contributed to my lack of trust but my thought process is just ridiculous. I literally spend my days stressing/obsessing and worrying. There is no fun left for me and I don't know how to address it.

If i was just an anxious person would i not be anxious about every other situation in my life? I'm really confused by the fact it's only him I stress about. I hate it. I love him so much and I am so lucky to have him because I have been a nightmare for so long now.

Thanks again, I really appreciate being able to be open and honest. My friends would just think i was ridiculous.

x

[nursegirl6572]

Hello and welcome!

I'm glad you started your own thread.  So many times, people's posts get lost in those old threads.

Let me ask you, did you have ANY history of anxiety before this med change?  Did you have the same kind of worries (about your hubby) before, just not as bad, or is this totally new?

You state this has been going on for two years, did the onset of the anxiety coincide with the new prescription?

Hopefully we can try to help you sort this out.  Your anxiety could have very well been triggered by the contraceptive, but one of the concerns could be that after this long, you've developed chronic anxiety, which can happen, regardless of the trigger.  Meaning, even if the pill was the cause or trigger, if you've developed chronic anxiety as a result of maybe not addressing it, it won't be as easy as discontinuing the med.  That would have had to happen back when you noticed the onset of the anxiety.

I'll look for your reply, hang in there, you're NOT alone!